“You know, I wish you weren’t my mate,” I say, once we’re out of earshot of the others.
I’d like to say it in front of everyone. I want everyone to know my true feelings about him. I want everyone to know what a coward James is. But I still won’t stoop that low.
For James, it’s not just his pride on the line. It’s also his place in the pack that’s at risk. And though I resent him for not choosing me, I still begrudgingly respect what he chose. I won’t take that from him.
“I wish I never met you,” I continue.
The words sound wrong. They feel clunky and awful on my lips. They feel like flimsy lies I’m saying to try to make myself feel better, but it’s true. James has caused me nothing but hurt and trouble.
I can see the hurt on his face as I fling these words at him. But he deserves it.
