My Laughable Fate

4. Why I do what I do

HERC POV

I love what I do, always have. Even before joining the Werewolf army, I was a warrior for a small pack in the East, the Silver Lake Pack. When the western packs created a council, and they needed warriors for their army, I joined up. I had just turned twenty-six and had been rejected by my mate. I wasn’t running away in sorrow or anything pitiful like that. Being rejected confirmed the path I had chosen.

We hadn’t had time to bond or get to know one another. The shewolf was very clear about what she wanted in life, and I wasn’t it for her. Instead of getting upset, I agreed with her. Helena wanted a powerful wolf who was influential, like her grandfather, Elder Marcus. That’s not me. I’m a warrior who goes where he’s needed. Helena was not the type of shewolf to make accommodations.

Neither was I. There was never a question about what I would be when I grew up. It wasn’t as obvious as it is for a first-born Beta or anything like she was, but it felt like being a warrior was in my blood. Almost everyone who knows about my origin has offered their unsolicited opinion about the asshole rapist that forced his seed on a poor unwilling shewolf. My mother.

It was assumed he was a Rogue, though I have my doubts based on the little my mother recounted. She described him as being larger than an average wolf. The aura he imposed on her was so powerful that it scared her into submission. If he was a Rogue, he had to be a Sigma. A wolf of high-ranking blood that chose to live as a Rogue instead of fulfilling his potential. Either way, he's a waste of flesh.

Though him being a Rogue isn't what makes him rotting flesh. No, it was his despicable act of forcing himself on my mother when she had just turned old enough to shift that tainted him as a degenerate. As an average shewolf of omega ranking, she didn’t stand a chance against most male wolves. Aside from the description she gave of him, she refuses to speak of what happened that day.

That’s why I do what I do. To stop wolves and anyone with ill intentions from harming innocents. I couldn’t bring myself to stop doing that, even for my mate. Honestly... I didn't think I would have to. Shouldn't our life goals have been at least a little compatible if we were mates? Or shouldn't one of us have been compelled to follow the other?

There must be something wrong with me because, even though Helena and I rejected one another almost instantly, I should have felt more than disappointment. No wolf wants to go through a rejection after all. Where was the heartbreak, the yearning? Listening to the Backstreet boys’ full blast while ugly crying and wiping your snot all over your pillow session.

Three years have passed, and I’ve thought of her maybe three times. Every time, the first question that pops up is why her? Why did you pair me with her Moon Goddess? I didn’t ask why I wasn’t given a second chance because I doubted there was a shewolf that could understand why my job was important to me. One that was willing to accept my career and somehow fit right into my life.

Another mindfucking fact is that the last time I thought of Helena, I was comparing her to someone who I can’t stop having very dirty dreams about. She is nothing like Master Sargeant Leia who managed to give me a hard on with an erect n****e. When did I become some teenage upstart that shot his shot before he took his pants off? That’s what it looked like things were coming to anyway.

“I’d ask the Goddess to give me a new human.” Aries, my wolf, asserted. “I wasn’t the one panting like a wild beast when we walked in on her while she was getting dressed.” That will forever be engraved in fondest memories. “She was wearing white cotton but made it look like lace! Besides, you almost drooled.” He argued and he was right. Maybe what made her so hot was that I couldn’t have her. I can still enjoy seeing her in action.

Watching her berate and irritate the male population, minus me, is a reminder of why I don’t want to be the one giving orders or dealing with arrogant wolves who think they know better because they were born with a title. Why would I want to when I could just stand there and watch her f**k with everyone and smile while doing it? Though right now, her face doesn’t have the mirth it usually does. No… she looks confused and irritated. “Something wrong, Master Sargeant?” I asked, but I could tell she was speaking with her wolf.

Her pouty pink lips were pursed, and her eyebrows furrowed. One of her hands came up and pushed a strand of light brown hair out of her face. I always found it strange that her eyes and hair were almost the same light brown color. Dark golden. If anyone saw a picture of this shewolf, they would find her adorably sexy and almost hinoset looking. Although she is not short, she has a smaller frame that is toned.

Esthetically, she’s perfection. That means everything else should be a hot mess, right? Warriors don’t have the luxury of being a hot mess, not a good warrior anyway. While she has... anger issues and a very evil streak, she is also confident, intelligent, loyal, selfless, and courageous. Yet right now, she looks like the red-headed wolf knocked the wind out of her sails just by entering the room. Something was wrong, I could feel it.

“Master Sargent? You, okay?” I asked again and this time she turned her slightly widened eyes at me. My back stiffened and I prepared to take action, but before I could turn to face the other wolf in the room, who was awkwardly silent, her hand landed on my arm. “I’m fine. Let’s go, we have a lot of calls to make. Delta Oscar?” She squinted her eyes at him and sniffed the air discreetly, but I noticed.

“Yes… sorry I didn’t say anything but when I walked in, you looked like you saw a ghost.” The Delta chuckled nervously and whipped his forehead. Leia eyed him suspiciously, looking him over for something. She was making a man that looked like a barrel with legs sweat. “Weapons?” Aries thought. “He’s no threat to her. Not even with a weapon.” I reminded him of what our deceptively cute boss could do, and he grunted.

When the wolf stepped aside and let us through the door, I followed behind Leia. “I’m still reeling over the fact that your Alpha isn’t here to greet me.” Leia said slyly and followed him. That wasn’t what was bothering her though. I mean, it was, but she wouldn’t take that out on anyone but the Alpha and his father for being a douche out the gate. Oscar didn’t know that, and her icy tone made him falter.

“My apologies Master Sargeant Leia. We respect our Alpha’s decisions, but we are regretful that they have painted him or our pack in an unfavorable light.” He sounded sincere and a little charming. Nothing at all what I expected considering the former Alpha's attitude. That was probably why they sent him, which makes me wonder if the Beta and Gamma are douches too. We reached an office, and he opened the door for us.

I walked into the office to take stock of the room and Oscar watched. Then I pulled out my scanner and began checking the room for bugs and cameras. Whatever Master Sargeant Leia spoke about while in this room, whether it was with her family or our superiors, it would stay private. The death of thirteen wolves wasn’t going to be taken lightly and I was certain the Commanders were already plotting.

Leia and Oscar remained quiet while I checked the phone and computer. The Delta was clearly intimated by my boss. Even when she was acting off, she gave off that don’t f**k with me vibe. It made me want to f**k with her. “I bet she likes being put in her place and f****d roughly.” Aries said casually. He had never hidden how much he liked her. In fact, it surprised me at first.

All wolves want their mates, even after rejection, at least for a while. The longer you bond, the longer they mourn. In my case, Aries was upset for about a month. He thought we were both selfish and stupid humans who didn’t deserve mates. After that, he only brought Helana up the few times I hooked up with a shewolf. Then he stopped caring.

With boss lady, we both instantly became protective and loyal to her. Like the bond that high ranking members have with one another but... different. Cuz we want to eat her up. “She’d probably demand we do some downright dirty and naughty things to her.” I almost shivered after my comment to Aries but caught myself checking the same bookcase again. This place was clean.

Since I was satisfied, I gave Leia a nod, and she scanned her eyes over Oscar once more. This time he noticed, and the asshole blushed. “She can’t possibly think he’s attractive. He has freckles!” Aries argued. “Some chicks dig freckles.” I guessed with a grumble. Though I couldn’t believe Leia was one of them. Not that I knew what she liked, but I couldn’t picture her with the ginger.

For some reason, I thought she was more of a tall, dark and handsome kind of shewolf. “With long dark hair and green eyes?” Aries jeered. “I’ve caught her eyeing me.” I argued and he made a satisfied grunting sound. “I’ll give you some privacy.” Oscar blurted out bringing me back to reality. Then he turned to leave. My eyes widened when I noticed her eyes locked on his ass. Boss lady has no shame!