5. Blaine
1927 Words
5
BLAINE
At the quiet singing of the barista, nausea had set in my stomach. I’d been familiar with that song about the joy of the Lord—too much. The gorgeous girl who had waited on me stated the same way I’d felt at hearing the damn tune.
The mention of God made her want to puke.
I wondered over her story while sipping my coffee and striding back to the jobsite. Studied the image of her I’d taken in my mind while devouring the muffin she’d suggested I buy.
Delicious—and I expected she was too.
Big brown eyes with dark lashes, glossed lips, petite…everything Grey’s and my hookup from the night before hadn’t been.
Any other normal guy would have flirted, hell, even outright asked for her number when they felt the interest brew in their balls like mine had at the sight of her.
Not for the first time, I hated my insecurities, wished s**t had been different for me so I could open my damn mouth and be normal.
Once I ambled back the three blocks I’d walked earlier, I’d finished my break snack, and the slight kick of excitement I’d had collapsed in on itself. I picked up where I’d left off on the job, spreading sand to ready a new patio for pavers, but my head refused to focus on work.
I wondered if the coffee girl’s skin would be as smooth beneath my fingertips as it appeared. Would she be turned on by my calluses and rough hands? Or did she not prefer the hardworking type of man who didn’t have any softness left to offer at all?
Fuck.
I swiped my forearm over my sweating brow, lips pressed tightly together. As if I had anything to give such a woman other than my d**k and an o****m or two.
Since when did I even think about a woman?
Still frowning, I grabbed a few papers off the pallet. If Grey knew I’d considered asking a girl out, he’d have been all over my a*s until I relented, fought off my nervousness, and took life by the balls.
Had he been with me, he’d have done the deed himself, saving me from discomfort.
Jealousy should have itched beneath my skin at the idea of Grey touching the coffee girl—I’d seen her first—but the thought of him shoving his d**k down her throat while I sank into her slick p***y gave me a chub enough that I had to adjust myself before kneeling down to set in the next line of blocks.
I loved sharing women with Grey, even enjoyed watching him with them if I wasn’t in the mood to f**k. The man had magic hands, and according to the people he brought home, his d**k was just as gifted. Hell knew he could move his hips like a male stripper. Kind of hard to not notice when he made a woman all but cry beneath him.
Not that I would ever tell him. Like I’d said, he didn’t need any help in stroking his ego.
“Blaine!”
“Yeah?” I hollered back at Wyatt, my boss, having recognized his deep raspy voice without seeing him.
He rounded the house I labored behind, and I sank back on my haunches.
“What’s up?”
“How’s it going?” His head swiveled while taking in the patio I sweated over, his bright blue eyes hidden behind shades and his dark hair and scruff just as sweaty as mine.
“Good. The base didn’t need much fixing after I ripped out that old shit.” I motioned toward the pile of old pavers I’d cleared first thing that morning. “Just a bit of stone dust and the sand.”
Wyatt nodded, and I bent forward to put another new block in place. I didn’t mind my boss watching me work. He’d been the one to train me and trusted me enough to leave me on a job alone.
“I was checking in to see if you needed help, but it doesn’t look like Davidson calling in sick set you back.”
“Nope,” I said, tapping the block with a rubber mallet to settle it evenly with the one beside it. “He okay?”
“Asshole is hungover.”
I nodded, having heard that excuse before. My drunken right-hand man missed more Mondays than he showed up for. Wyatt had a soft spot for the guy. I’d never asked why since I wasn’t one to sit and shoot the s**t.
“Looks like you have a couple days here at most,” Wyatt said.
“Could be the entire week if Davidson doesn’t show up tomorrow though.”
“He promised he’d be here.”
“I’ll believe that when I see it,” I grumbled.
Wyatt made a noise of agreement under his breath. “I landed that contract for the Sunrise Condos buildings.”
“No s**t!” I sat back again, grinning up at him while squinting. “f*****g cool.”
“Right?” He grinned, flashing perfectly straight teeth I couldn’t help but envy.
There’d been no yearly dentist checkups when I’d been a kid, no option of an orthodontist to fix my crooked lower teeth.
Just another insecurity to add to the s**t in my life.
Grey had offered to pay, but I’d taken enough handouts from him in our nine years together.
“When do we start?” I asked, refusing to fall back into the trap like I’d done the night before and on my walk home from the cafe.
“They want two guys full time—and I was hoping you’d take on the management of the property.”
I blinked in the bright sunlight, sure I’d misheard. “Seriously?”
“Yeah, man. You’ve proven your worth time and again. No one shows up like you, works their a*s off without complaint. f**k, if I had deeper pockets, I’d offer you another raise.”
Wyatt had given me one six months earlier, and I’d been beyond thankful for his generosity.
“You’re the hardest worker I have, Blaine. Wish I could clone the f**k out of you.”
Warmth swelled inside my chest at the words of praise. If the guy kept talking like that, I’d fall into platonic love with him like I was with Grey.
“I appreciate it,” I told him.
He dipped his head. “Same. I’ll let you know what’s up with Davidson in the am, but if he calls off again, I’ll make sure you’ve got a grunt to help you finish this by Friday.”
“Sounds good.”
“I put the business sign in the yard out front—sorry I didn’t replace yours from the last job.”
Part of our contracts allowed for us to put up advertisement signs in customer’s front yards, and the one I’d had in my company truck had gone missing.
“I need to order a couple more, so I’ll be sure to grab you a few.”
“Thanks.”
Wyatt ambled back the way he’d come, and I focused back on doing a good job to keep the positive reviews coming in for Lionel’s Landscaping. The busier Wyatt was, the more security I had.
Even if the new management position didn’t come with another pay raise, the knowledge that my boss trusted me to represent his family business made me smile all damn day.
When Grey got home later that night, he pulled up short, blinking at me where I stood in the kitchen, grinning like an i***t while making spaghetti.
“Did you go out and get laid all on your own?” he asked, his voice raised in disbelief at my rare display of jolliness.
“Wyatt’s offering me a management position—he landed that Sunrise Condo contract.”
“Get the f**k out.” Grey set down his briefcase and shrugged off his suit coat. “That’s f*****g awesome.”
The previous twenty-four hours had been a roller coaster, diving into s**t from the looks of the woman we’d shared, to chugging upward from the sight of coffee girl then cresting at the news from Wyatt.
An hour later, my brain rushed back downhill over the news Grey watched on TV behind me while I finished up our dinner dishes.
A young girl, barely legal, had filed charges of childhood r**e—against a well-known TV evangelist.
My stomach emptied right there on the floor, spaghetti, beer, and bile splattering over the marble tile.
“f**k!” Grey hopped off the couch, the TV shut down and the clicker tossed, clattering on the living room floor. “Sorry, Blaine—I didn’t change channels fast enough—f*****g hell.”
Another eruption gagged me, and I coughed, bent over with my hands on my knees.
Memories slammed into my brain, and I shook, eyes wide and staring at the reddened mess I’d made so I wouldn’t focus on the images in my head.
Grey laid his hand on my lower back, rubbing while offering me a wet paper towel. “Okay?”
I nodded, swallowing hard against another heave. Grabbing the towel, I blinked and straightened. After a quick swipe of the damp cloth over my face, Grey spun me, pulling me against him.
A shudder ripped through my body, and I sank into his embrace, my cheek on his shoulder, my arms limp at my sides.
It wasn’t the first time Grey had held me upright and offered his strength when mine left me.
“I’m so f*****g sorry,” he murmured, his breath hot on my hair.
“Not your fault.” My voice rasped from acid rawness.
“Go hop in the shower. I’ll clean this up.”
I pulled away, shaking my head, coolness sliding down over my front where his body had provided much-needed warmth. A deep yearning to take advantage of his heat swept through me, but I stayed steady. “No. I’ll do it.”
The stench of vomit clung to my nose long after I scrubbed the floor, and it took a hot shower and a thorough scouring of my teeth to erase the effects of past memories.
Fucking bottoming out in my head did me in every goddamn time.
Weakness continued to plague my knees, and no matter how much I tried to focus on the present, my thoughts wandered to my sister.
With dark hair and bright hazel-green eyes, she’d been a spitting image of our led-like-a-lamb mom—and in our leader’s sights when I’d left.
At thirteen, she’d been a budding beauty, and our dad had pushed her into our leader’s focus whenever he’d been able to.
I feared what had become of her, if she’d been soiled like I’d been. Used up and left a mere husk. Incapable of feeling good emotions for longer than fleeting moments.
Guilt rose to choke me as I lay in bed, my eyes clenched tight. Leaving her behind hadn’t been easy, but if I had stayed at the compound, I would have rested six feet beneath the soil long before my time. I’d been near the point of suicide when Grey offered to take me away from the only home I’d known.
Selfishly, I’d agreed.
And not a day didn’t go by that I didn’t mourn the only family member I’d loved—and left.
- Writer
