"Hurry up Cassandra." I murmur to myself as it as become an usual habit to miss first periods, which is totally unintentional.
Picking up my bag and slipping my phone which has just few contacts and one or two pictures of me on the days I wanted to give myself hope that my life can be better if I make myself happy.
"Granny, I'll see youuu." I shout, waving hurriedly as I run to the bus station which won't really help me get to school fast, but at least, I won't be as late as I will be without taking the bus.
"Lord, Lord please You have to help me get a bus fast." I keep murmuring to myself as I am running.
"You shouldn't run when you are already late, join me." A girl says patting the unoccupied space beside her.
"You can sit here while you wait for the bus." She adds with a small smile and I sit.
"Thanks." I mumble quietly.
"You aren't actually welcome, I wasn't talking to you. Miranda, come and sit. Strange girl stand up." She laughs and I stand up wearing my hoodie as I walk hastily away from both of them. There laughter can still be heard and I can't help the feeling of disgrace I feel.
I have questioned my existence so many times, wondered why I had not followed my parents to their friend's wedding and died with them in the accident.
Didn't people say those up are watching over you to protect you? Parents' tell their children in movies when they are about to die that they will always watch and protect their children, but that isn't true.
The seventeen year old me is left to suffer on earth.
"Hey! You will probably get dried by the sun and you're very late right now. You're a student of CHS, right? I'll drop you off I have some things to do at CHS." This hot guy with perfect hazel eyes and perfect pink lips says to me from the window of his SUV.
"Thank you." I murmur without looking at him much, I sit at the passengers seat avoiding the middle mirror.
Aren't you the most stupid girl right now for getting into a stranger's car?
I know I'm stupid, but I don't need you rubbing it in my face, now leave me alone and let me be!
Stranger danger, Cas.
Okay, mind leaving me alone now?!
"Here, get down or do you want to keep thinking all day long? If I were to be your teacher, I'll deal with you." He says cutting off the discussion between thoughts and myself.
"Thank you," I mumble quietly.
"See you around." He says with a wink and drive off.
Running with all my might, I finally get to class, losing first period which was English, second History and here I'm for the third which happens to be mathematics, my favorite subject.
"A very punctual student we have right here." Gretchen says loud enough for even a deaf person to hear and the whole class laughs.
"Pizza girl." Another guy says and they all laugh again.
"See me in my office after this class, Cassandra!" The maths teacher says to me, "now sit!" She adds with a ‘I don't know what your problem is’ type of look and walk out of the class.
I bow my head before looking for an empty sit.
Walking towards the only sit left which is at the back, my favorite position. I place my bag on the floor and sit without looking.
I feel my skirt getting soaked and my eyes diverts to the words scribbled on my desk.
Nerd, nerd.Pizza girl! We need pizza. It's our dead grandfather's birthday in class tomorrow.Ugly in glasses.Coffee girl.
Laughing emojis are also drawn.
Someone throws a piece of paper on my desk right in front of me.
Holding back the tears that's already blurring my sight, I open the paper to read its content.
Hey ugly skinny! How does it feel to have your skirt soaked with a small pint of 72 hours urine? I can imagine you smelling like a fish dung right now.
I read the content on the paper and tuck in the paper into my bag.
I won't give them what they want. I won't cry...
Picking up my bag, I move out the class hurriedly. I take extremely fast strides to the restroom.
Pushing open the door of one of the cubicles, I throw my bag on the basin and let go of the tears that have been threatening to fall.
Feeling irritation and slight pain in the pit of my tummy, I clench my tummy and stand up from where I was kneeling. I vomit my guts out into the toilet bow and rest my back against the titled wall of the cubicle.
I hate my life so much, I don't know the pleasure they derive in bullying.