I'll Come out Fighting

Chapter 6

Jayne

I eventually got home a little after 4am, I climbed straight into my bed after texting Jeff I was home safe. It’s a thing we do every night. He’s the only one I know that will still be awake at that time.

‘Stop. No. Please. Stop. Max. Stop, please.’

Shit. Another nightmare. Reaching over I check the time on my clock. Eleven am. Not too bad considering the time I got to bed. I suppose I better get up and get ready for lunch at Jay’s.

I head for the shower scrub my body clean, wash away my nightmare. Wash away my memories of that night. These nightmares don’t happen very often, normally when something has happened throughout the day or at work that reminds me of him or the way he used to be.  And well, it is coming up to the anniversary of that day. I need to get my head straight.

Once I’m ready I head to Jay’s place. He lives on the other side of town so it will take a good half hour to get there. I can’t wait to see my niece and nephews. It’s been too long since I saw them last.  When I pull up outside Jays, everyone is in the front yard playing about.

Jemma is the first to see me, she is 6 years old and the spitting image of her mother.  She squeals as I get out my car and comes running over to meet me at the gate.

“Auntie Jayne”  she shouts jumping up and down on the spot. Well, the whole street knows I’m here now.

“Hey sweetie pie” I say as I get through the gate and she jumps into my arms.  She is the cutest wee girl ever.  Soon her brother and cousin come running over and tackle me and I’m soon lying on the grass with three kids on top of me.

“Auntie Jayne, Uncle Jamie said you were nasty to him last night. Did he upset you again?”  Jeremy said as he helps me up.

“No, I was just tired last night buddy. Uncle Jamie could never upset me.” I tell him as I ruffle his hair

The kids soon leave after getting their secret presents from my bag, if their parents know they have sweets before lunch, I will get a telling off from them.  I head to the house as I see my brothers hanging about on the front porch.  I go up to Jamie and smack the back of his head

“Why are you telling the kids I was nasty to you last night?  You were the one who didn’t pay for your drinks, again”

“Hell, Jayne. Your hits are getting worse. That bloody hurt” he says rubbing his head. “I was just winding them up, Christ” he says as he gets another slap from Amanda, Jays wife

“Language Jamie. The kids will hear you and your big mouth”  I am bent over laughing as he continues to rub his head.  He walks away muttering under his breath. Something about crazy women and glad that he is single.

Lunch was good. I have actually missed my crazy family. We have made it a tradition to get together at special times like this, not to necessary reminisce about our parents, but to just get together and be happy.  The atmosphere is light, Jay telling us about the new site he’s working on, Jamie going on about his new designs that Ryder loves. I think he has a man crush on Ryder, he hasn’t stopped talking about him.  The kids telling us about school and the holidays coming up. Jackson has the biggest news though, he has a date next weekend with one of the new teachers who lives the town over.

We were all a little shocked about that, as he has shown no interest in dating for a long time, seemingly according to his son Jonah, the female teacher was flirting with Jackson and was making it way obvious, so Jonah slipped her Jackson’s number. For a 7 year old boy he is way too clever.

I soon have to say my goodbyes as I need to get back home and get ready for my shift at the club tonight. I’m not in until 7 but fancy a nap before heading to work.

As my brothers walk me to my car, the kids stay in to get extra ice cream.

“You doing alright?” Jackson is the first to ask.  I nod my head

“yeah, had a nightmare last night for the first time in ages. I will be fine. I’m working tonight so it will keep my mind of things.” I say as I hug each of my brothers bye.

“I’ll be round tonight, will stay with you tonight too, ok?” Jamie says as he holds my door open. 

“If you must. You have your key, drop your stuff off on the way to the club and stay away from that girl next door, she was doing my head asking for you the last time you stayed over.” I tell him, as I jab my finger into his chest, him rubbing at it as I climb into my car.

“Take care baby sis. Call us if you need us anytime ok?” Jay says, as always.  I nod my head waving goodbye and pulling away from his house and heading back to mine for a nap.

When I wake up a little after 5pm from yet another nightmare, I’m a bit of a nervous wreck. I haven’t felt this way for months.  I really was hopeful that all my therapy sessions would help me avoid this feeling.  It is really hard to explain.  The feeling that your are reliving the whole thing after nearly a year.  The way my body felt after it all. The way my mind was working over drive during the whole process.  The looks on my brothers faces when they saw me in the hospital. The looks the doctors gave me when I was discharged.  It just comes in floods through my nightmares.

Heading to the shower to try make myself feel some sort of normal.  I hear Jamie coming in and hollering that he has arrived.  Earlier than I thought he would have. He maybe has sensed how stressed I was at lunch. Again, Jamie and I are like two pees in a pod. He seems to read me like a book and knows exactly when I need him closer than normal.

Once I’m washed and changed, I head through to the lounge to find Jamie raiding my fridge moaning that there is nothing decent to eat.

“We can grab food on the way to the club and eat in the office” I tell him as I get my bag ready and pick up some of the paperwork I brought home to work on but didn’t actually get to it, since I went to lunch then straight for a nap when I got back.

“Sounds like a plan. I’ll phone Antonio and get something ready to collect.” He says as he fishes out his phone from his pocket.

We soon head out of my apartment and jump into my car. Jamie has never liked my car, he thinks it’s a piece of trash. I just happen to like the look of it, but I do agree its time for a change.  I have had it nearly four years, and change is always good.

I park the car at the back if the club, making sure it locked up and head around the front to the bar.  Jamie runs over to Antonio’s to get our food.  When I head inside I notice the bar is a little busier than normal but there is plenty staff to work away on their own.

Jeff is not in until later as he was doing a split shift to cover Graham this afternoon. I check the guys are ok before heading up to the office. Just as I head to the stairs, I notice Ryder sitting at the end of the bar with a bottle of beer and his phone in his hand.

“Ryder”  I hear Jamie shout as he heads over to us.  Ryder lifts his head with a dazzling smile on his face when he sees me standing just to the side of him.

“Hey Jamie, Jayne” he nods then sips his beer.

“You are a bit earlier than we planned” Jamie says as he hands me the bag of food from the Italians.  The smell making my mouth water.

“Yeah, my apartment is so boring so I thought I would head out early.” He says as he finishes his beer, ordering himself another and one for Jamie as well.

“You want to join us for some food, plenty here to feed the whole bar” Jamie offers as he points to the bag of food I’m holding.

“Yeah sounds good. If that’s ok with Jayne” he looks up to me, waiting on my reaction.

“Yeah sure. Come on up.” I say as I make my way up the stairs. Why on earth did Jamie do that? I mean I have no real problem with Ryder at all, just was kind of wanting to talk to Jamie about my other nightmare.

When we get into the office, I clear some space on the table beside the sofas and start opening up the containers.  The smell soon filling the room, an amazing aroma making my stomach rumble. Thankfully it was a quiet rumble, don’t want the sexy beast, Ryder hearing that.  Ok, where did that come from.

We all soon start tucking into the food. The chatter flowing nicely and before you know it its time for me to start my shift.  Just as I start to clear up the containers of food to put in the bin, one of the staff knock the door.

“Needing change in the VIP till, Jayne”  Bobby says as he peaks his head around the door.

“Ok, I’m on it.” I say as I head to the safe.  As I open up the safe, I come across that mobile phone that was left last night. The battery must have died as the screen is dark.

“Ryder, remember that mobile is still in here form last night. Can you contact your staff about it?” I ask him as I take out the change for Bobby. He nods in response, typing in his phone, setting a reminder. Making sure the safe is locked up again.  I tell them to tidy up as I nip up to VIP.

When I get back the guys are hanging about outside the office.  We make sure the office is locked at all times when no-one is inside, extra security.  I lock it up and head down to the main bar.  It is quiet just now but will soon start to get busy as the night goes on.

I leave Jamie and Ryder to entertain themselves as I head behind the bar to serve customers.  I notice that it doesn’t take long for them to catch the attention of groups of females that are hanging about the bar, which to be honest does not surprise me one little bit. I know my brother is a good looking guy, he has always had woman chasing him. And Ryder, well he is just s*x on legs. He may be a bit cheeky with his charm but with the time I have spent with him earlier, he seems like a genuine likeable guy.

After a little while the bar quietens down a little and I make my way out on the floor to collect empties and check on the DJ at the same time.  As I pass by Jamie at the end of the bar, he has a girl practically sitting on his lap.  I try not to get too involved with my brother and his antics but sometimes he needs to be told who to avoid.

Normally he is pretty good at seeing what the woman are like but tonight it just seems like his good girl radar is off.  The said girl that is trying her hardest and seems to be succeeding just so happens to be a cousin of my ex Max. Now, I have nothing against his family, but they weren’t exactly the nicest to deal with especially when he was sent to prison.

“ditch the b***h” I text him from the other side of the dance floor.

“Why? She is fit as f**k” he replies

“She may be, but she is a cousin of Max” I message back as I head over with the bucket of empties.

I go straight to the back room and fill the washer, taking through the clean glasses and stocking stacking the shelf.  I’m not even paying attention to what is going on around me until Jamie shouts my name.   I head over to him and he just hugs me. 

“Sorry, I didn’t realise that was her, she has changed since I saw her last” he whispers in my ear.

“Its fine. I just know what she is like. She will milk your bank dry if you let her anywhere near.”  I tell him shaking my head. 

We soon get past that and I leave him to enjoy the rest of his night. Knowing that Ryder is with Jamie, I don’t feel the need to constantly stand beside him and get busy working away.

Jeff soon comes in for his shift, which was perfect timing as it seems to have went absolutely crazy busy.  Throughout the whole night I see Ryder sneaking glances at me every so often. Not entirely sure if he even realises he is doing it, but the girl that is standing right beside him trying to get his attention clearly sees she is fighting a losing battle, as she storms off without even ordering a drink.

The next hour or so was crazy busy. I have no idea where these people all come from. Not that I am complaining it is always good to be this busy, helps my bank balance hugely.  I eventually get to grab myself a break and head up to the office to chill out.  Just as I unlock the door, I hear my name being called. I turn to see Ryder standing at the end of the corridor

“Everything alright?” I ask him as I push the door open.

“yeah and no.” he says.  Making me raise an eyebrow at his double answer.

“You want to come in?” I ask him. Slightly confused as to why he came up.  I know he won’t try anything funny as Jamie is downstairs and my whole security team.

“Yeah, thanks” he says as he walks into the office and wonders around aimlessly.  I close the door over and flick on the tv to check the cameras and make sure the staff are all ok.

“Your club is amazing. Is it always this busy?”  Ryder asks as he leans against the edge of the desk watching the camera with me.

“Yeah, Friday and Saturdays are the busiest. Thursday and Sundays can be a little crazy as well.” I say as I make myself a coffee. Need to stay awake for the rest of the shift.

“Do you ever get a night off?” he asks, almost in a whisper

“Monday night we are closed but the rest of the week I try and make sure the others have time off.” I say as I turn of the TV, satisfied that everyone is behaving.

“So, say someone wanted to ask you out on a date on a night the club is open. You could get someone to cover?” he questions.

“Never had to worry about that. I haven’t been on a date in over two years and no one has asked. Why?” I question him now.  I have a funny feeling he is testing the waters, but I could be wrong.

“I was trying to see if you would be able to get a night of so we could go out.” He asks almost hesitating.

“What? Like a date or with Jamie and the others?” I ask. I see him blush slightly, which is cute.

“A date?”

“Ryder. The thing is, I’m not in a place for dating right now. And if I’m honest probably won’t be in the near future.  I’m sure you will find out at some point, I had a hard time of it last year and I just don’t date not anymore anyway.” I tell him. And if I’m honest I am kind of regretting it. The look on his face making me feel bad.

“Right. Mia and Aaron both did say that my charms wouldn’t work but I thought I would give it a try. I just had to know for sure. OK. So, I’ll head back down now, I’ll see you later.” And then he was gone.

Why did I say no? Why haven’t I dated recently? I know I had a s**t time a year ago but why should I let that stop me from having some fun. I mean, I’m not scared of men or having s*x. I think because the town is so small everyone knew what had happened and no man from here has ever approached me since.