Future Ex Fiancée

8. THE FEAR

Asmi~

Virat is confusing. That's what I thought the entire night when I felt his warmest lips on my skin.

My face was warm at that small touch and my stomach filled with butterflies.

But then, it was all wrong. He wasn't the man I was supposed to be attracted to. He was someone else's. And that conformed the next morning when I heard Virat talking to his alleged girlfriend over the phone planning their date. There was a pang in my heart when I heard him giving her a nickname. That was the moment I thought I'd lost him long ago.

Who was I kidding? He wasn't mine in the first place.

I sighed and stayed in my room the entire time, drowning myself in my work. It felt better, at least work's a good distraction. After my not so eventful but successful day pretending to be alright with Virat in a villa, I survived. My stomach flipped multiple times when he appeared in my room once in a while to check up on me, asking if I needed anything.

If only he knew. . .

In the afternoon, I was all ready in my white t-shirt and short dungaree for some shopping; I found Virat in the grand room talking on his phone as usual. Although the moment his eyes fell upon me, he stopped. He stopped talking and his parted lips were left open for a while. I gave him a tight-lipped smile and decided to walk past him.

And just then his voice stopped me. "You going somewhere?"

I nodded, "yeah. I've heard of that amazing street fair just across the hotel and maybe I'll watch the sunset later too." I gestured him my camera, giving it a little shake in my hands.

"Oh!"

I shrugged, "yeah. Ciao."

And I started to walk away. Until, "asmi wait." I hummed in askance.

"Will you be okay? I mean it's a different country —" I stopped him, letting him know that I'd be just fine. He nodded hesitantly, "I would have joined you. But Veronica is coming over. In the evening, I guess." He informed me and it just got worse.

"Yeah. I know." His brows rose at my response, "you don't talk that low." This time I didn't wait and left.

It was better that I won't have him for a while; especially when she'll be here.

∆∆∆

As the time passed, the beautiful street fair didn't lift my mood much. I called my friend Abhi and listened to his crazy stories back in NYC. Now that made me smile and attempt to watch the most beautiful sunset and one successful but many failed attempt to capture the beauty; I was on my way back.

Taking the sand path of the sea shore, I walked towards the villa while sipping on some iced green coffee. I dumped the empty cup in the trash and when I was almost close to the gate of the villa, I saw virat standing there.

Somehow, I smiled and took faster steps. I bought him a Bennie. I couldn't help but get a black one for him as he looked so good with those. Keeping all tension aside, me and Virat were always friends. I had accepted that but our changing relationship tags made things complicated. I sighed at the thought and decided not to mess up this friendship.

I walked and suddenly my steps halted when I saw someone hug him close from behind. Virat smiled and took off his shades, turning towards the other person. My heart thumped crazily and broke when I saw who that was.

Veronica.

I didn't even realize that I was barely a few feet away from the couple. And just when I decided to turn back, Virat looked over me. I could feel myself crumbling when I saw nothing in his eyes. I needed support. Physically and mentally. I bit on my lip trying not to sob over that heartbreaking sight. I've never had an idea why this man had the ability to make me go through all sorts of messed-up emotions. And at that moment, they were overloaded.

With one arm around her shoulder, Virat kept staring at me. Blankly.

One moment, it was as if his gaze was mocking me. At that moment, I realized I had lost this long time ago. His lips moved, mouthing my name. Almost, almost, I believed that he whispered my name. It seemed like when Veronica left his arms and turned. Her striking face shifted towards me. And I wished that the earth could swallow me. Then and there. She looked between me and Virat.

My mind was jammed. But then again I heard my name being called again and again. Getting louder every time. When I followed the voice, my eyes widened.

It was Kabir.

He was calling out to me, and waited his hands to get my attention. Before I broke into sobs and tears, I ran towards him, passing by the couple. Kabir's strong arms went around me and rubbed my back in a comforting caress; that was the moment when I burst into tears.

Oh how I was relieved to see him!

"Hey frankie, what happened?" His sweet voice asked as he kept holding me. I felt less abandoned.

"I never expected such a reaction." He trailed off rocking himself in a funny way, "since when you start to shed tears, hmm? Your voice is quite monstrous." Kabir chuckled, earning a slap on his arm.

When I backed away from his much needed embrace, he ruffled my hair. But looking at my tear-drenched face he pouted and opened his arms again, this time coming forward and wrapping me in his arms.

After some time, he asked me to go for a coffee and I agreed and walked side by side with him. But he wasn't quite at all and made weird jokes telling me why he needed a break and came to visit the Caribbean. "Damn, ruksaar is getting moody." My mouth just fell upon when he spoke like that about his girlfriend. But in return he just shrugged, "I just needed a break." I shook my head and decided not to think too much about his crazy a*s' mind. After a few minutes' walk, we entered a beach café.

Once we were seated, he started off, "by the way, I was joking. I am here to chill off. But—" he raised a finger dramatically, "we didn't break up. I love that woman for God's sake." A faint smile broke my lips. I didn't even realize it until Kabir reciprocated.

"I guess you don't want to talk about what just happened there." He trailed off in a careful tone, "who was the guy anyway?"

I bit down my lip but he only looked at me confusingly, "what! All I could see was his back. Is he someone I know? Did he do something to you Frankie? Just tell me and I'll beat the —" I raised my hand and stopped him from getting all raged up, he was already rolling his sleeves up.

"It's okay. I am alright now." I mumbled. I was just being stupid, f*****g naive.

"You sure, Frankie?"

I gave him a look, "don't call me that. My voice ain't anymore like Frankenstein." I scolded myself but he just laughed, holding his stomach.

"I know. Those golden days in the office when that god damn cough made you sound like a monster. I swear." I smacked him in return and we laughed for quite a long while.

I sensed Kabir was worried about me when he offered to walk back towards the villa. He didn't ask a lot of questions but just supported me. And that's what I needed at the moment. When I was near the villa, I bid my byes to him and thanked him for being there for me. But again he just cracked another lame joke and made me smile.

Just like that.

"Whatever is happening to you I don't know. I won't even ask until you tell me, but till then I just want you to take care of yourself. Most importantly, I don't want you to cry. Do you understand Frankie?" I nodded when he gave me a look before leaving. I turned back and opened the small gate of the villa which was connected to the shore.

And just when I stepped inside, I saw Virat sitting on the stairs near the pool.

The second he lifted his face, I gasped, looking at his red eyes. My sight halted at the sight but just then he stood up and walked in my direction slowly. Menacingly.

I took a step back when he was at arms length but he beat it and grabbed me harshly. His once warm gaze went cold on me as he began dragging me inside the villa; straight to his room, completely avoiding my discomfort.

Those barely lifted spirits were crushed when I took in his angry face.

For the first time ever, I saw him fuming like that and it was very scary. My heart thumped against my ribs and legs trembled when I stood in his room, facing him.

"Who was he?" Virat asked calmly, but there was a creepy quietness in his voice.

I breathed deeply and was tempted to just sit on the bed for a while. My legs were about to give up. I leaned to do the same, just then he yanked me back, grabbing me by the shoulders and made me face him.

"I'm talking to you dammit! Tell me who that guy was." His nails dug into my arms and I felt it. I felt the pain.

I bit on the insides of my lips as I kept casting my gaze down.

Oh God No.

The moment he once again hissed those words into my ears, I sputtered, "He was my friend." I whispered, almost panting before him.

I winced when his grip started hurting me, "you are hurting me virat." He didn't even flinch, "please." Still, his palms held me firmly.

Just then, I broke into tears when the pain intensified. Emotional and physical pain. It was just too much.

Suddenly, in one swift movement, his hands were off me. I felt him release a shaky breath while I sobbed quietly, this time paling my face. "Woah, why are you crying? s**t! I'm sorry asmi. Did I hurt you?" I kept my gaze hellwards, while tears fell down at my every blink.

Taking a sharp breath, I angrily slapped his hand away when he once again tried to reach for me.

I was convinced of one thing now and it proved to be true in my head.

"Talk to me please. Your silence kills me, asmi." I flinched when his warm fingers touched my cheek and soon, when his palms covered my jaw, I shivered.

But when he reached for my hand again, a dull pain washed over me, giving those horrible flashes of cruelty. In a heartbeat, I took a step back to get away from his hold. To get away from his warm touch. He must have been calmed by now, but his once impulsive side made me repulse him.

Then and there.

"Asmi. Baby, what —" I raised my palm asking him to stop, refraining him from coming closer.

This time I looked right into his eyes and spoke as bitterly as I could. I knew I would regret saying this later but I said it anyway, "you all are the same."

His face immediately held confusion but there was a glimpse of pain in his eyes. Although he must have forgotten; I was hurt too. "Wha—what do you mean?" He asked. Confusion shone in his eyes, coming closer to me. He was more alert by now, paying attention to my every move.

"Don't make me say it again." I murmured breathless, tears still streaming down my face. When his fingers reached and wiped the moisture under my eyes, I blinked.

"Say it. I want to hear." He urged, tipping my chin up.

They aren't the same asmi. Boys of this generation are gentle and considerate.

I shook my head when those words said by mumma rang in my ears. It didn't go quite well with my mind.

Virat had done the same, right? They are all the same. What if he'd also — "Asmi, it was an act of impulse. I didn't mean to hurt you okay?" His voice was low and deep, coaxing me to believe him. But not this time.

"It always starts with an impulse." I blurt, looking directly into his eyes this time.

Virat's brown orbs widen at the bitterness in my voice. A small frown began to appear above his left brow. Just when I looked away after giving him a little glance, he sighed loudly beside me.

Virat took hold of my arm and jerked my body towards him. To face him. "Get one thing clear in your tiny head, I hate being compared." His hot breath harshly hissed in my ear as I stood there unflinchingly as he trailed off, "and definitely not the one you compare me with right now." That breathy deep voice shivered my entire self and hair at my nape stood up. "I've apologized already, I won't repeat myself." With that he left my hand rather harshly and took a step back.

My heart dropped when he left the room, leaving me alone.

Once the room filled with silence and the quiet sound of my breath, I broke into quiet sobs, slumping down the floor.

After a while, I wiped my tear-stained cheeks with the back of my hands, and got up, slowly rubbing my palms over my shorts. Just when I realized I wasn't in my room but Virat's, I quickly went downstairs and entered my room.

.

I plopped on the bed and rested my eyes for a while.

By the time I opened my eyes, the moon was up too shining brightly as he was in happy mood. And here I wasn't.

At all.

A small star shone beside the moon, bringing a faint smile on my face, remembering someone I'd lost over time until sleep eloped me once again.

Virat~

I've screwed up again.

Badly.

When I saw that disappointment followed by some unknown fear in her eyes, there was a shot of unbearable churn in my stomach.

But how could I stop when she disappeared like that with another guy? Who the f**k was he anyway? The way he hugged Asmi, I don't know how and why, but I wanted to break his face. Asmi was my responsibility, here in the west western Indies at least. He was no one to take her away like that. Take her away from me. My lips pursed at the mere reminiscence.

When I dragged Asmi once she was back, I couldn't help but feel her soft skin. Her warmth eloped me so like her scent, it was faint yet almost addictive, luring me to breathe more. Breathe her more. I was dazed yet angry. I was angry at her for leaving me hanging like that. But Asmi was so close to me now, so f*****g close, her face was almost touching my chest as if she wasn't staring at me.

At that moment, all I had was to lean in and — "f**k!" I swore and threw my head back. Reaching for my face, I tried to rub away the frustration. I groaned loudly as I thought of the same moment again and again. But when I calmed down a little, I thought to myself.

With whom she was comparing me to?

The question rammed into my head repeatedly. And I just couldn't stop it.

All this time I had known Asmi, I am dead sure she wasn't in a relationship. Set aside being in a abusive one. She had told me herself.

Breaking my thoughts, my iPhone beeped with Veronica's text.

Hey, we have an after-shoot wrap up party. Want to join me there, babe?

I wasn't in the mood at all. I replied the same in sweeter words and tossed the device on the mattress beside me.

Asmi, f**k. You are a hell of a job. Her thoughts to me the entire time as I mourned over my stupidity over and over again, until I decided to get up and let her face my sorry a*s.