The Fledgling

FOUR

Kneeling down at the altar where my mothers ashes are is what I have been doing all morning today. Instead of being ready for laters curnest, I have nothing but an empty stomach. I should be hungry right now, but I felt nothing but full, maybe it is a result of being so numb all night and all day. I did not sleep since the Jade brought her to the Station and burn her body to ashes. I have been praying that her soul will be in peace, that she would not scare me at night while I am sleeping. I am afraid of the dark actually, I do not sleep with no shade of light near or beside me. I look up when Jaime walk towards me. I did not even heard him entering our home. He is staring at me with pity on his eyes. He is wearing a white jumpsuit and his hair is in a slick back style. He is already prepared for the Curnest, while I am still wearing what I am wearing yesterday. “Guessing from your state, you did not eat or even move a little bit from that space.” Well, he guess right. I did not. He sat down beside me and give his prayer and respect for my mom. “You have to eat… And get prepared for the Curnest… Or else, you will end up in the Jade’s arms.” If you did not obey or even followed the rule during Curnest, you have nothing against the Jade at that moment, they will force you to be at the curnest, or worst, they will imprison you. Looking at him, you could tell that he really is concerned about my situation right now. “Then maybe it is good, then I wouldn't have to go to that Curnest… I don’t even know what will they do to us once you got accepted.” I am scared. Today is my first time being part of the Curnest… I don’t know the process, but Jaime told me to not be scared, their test for our health is not even painful, or you will feel a thing… Well, that is the test, but what if you got to be chosen and you become an experiment, I am sure that is painful. But I trusted myself and my instinct, I wouldn’t be selected, not only to what I did yesterday but to what my situation right now.

He called my name… Jessup, and get my hand and gave me a golden coin. I look at it and an image of a Raven is what is in the coin. “Where’d you get that?” Raven symbolizes change, a symbol of hope, a symbol that a new day will come for tomorrow. “Dad gave it to me… I’m supposed to give it to my son, but… What would my son do with a coin? He is a two years old… While you… You can have it.” Sometimes I felt like Jaime is my father and I am really thankful for his presence, without him I don’t know what will I do. I thank him for the coin, enough for him to convince me to move. Well, even though I am confident enough that I will not be chosen to be an experiment, I got a thought that now, that my mother is dead, what is stopping me for wishing not to be in the Curnest? When I will be out here in the Quarter, stop being a farmer for the rest of my life and got the sickness that will kill me…

Now I know why my father killed himself.

Jaime help me take a bath… I just felt so numb that I can’t even move my arm to make myself covered in water. I just do not have the energy to do anything right now… If it is not Curnest today, I will be lying down on the bed all day and starve myself till I decided to hunt. He sings me a song, a song of a Fledgling…

The darkest nights, is where the stars go bright,

Hope is a flame that burns, where all the shadows turns.

In a place where greens, where bird go fly high,

It is where the hope begins.

Jaime put on my Jumpsuit to me and fixes my hair, brush it to my right side and make me look presentable. Never in my life I look good… I smiled to him and thank him. If I would have a brother, it would be him. Before we get to the Circle, where the Young are lined up, I walk again in the bathroom, and just like yesterday, I open a new batch of container, containing the pills that my father use to kill himself. I took a deep breathe before I took 13 pills and swab it onto my throat with the running water on the sink. Now I am ready.

Jaime and I head to the Circle where the young are already lined up signing their name up. Attendance is mandatory, not only to make sure that every young are here, but also to keep tabs to how many young are in every quarter, and how many young are turning to be an adult, how many will soon to die and how many will soon fled hope to the Manor. The man from the Manor greeted with a ‘Good Morning’ if only he knew that my morning is not good, when it is time for me to sign up my name, they ask my age and answered them with sixteen. They separate each file by age and gave me the folder of those who are age by sixteen. The pen felt foreign in my hand as I write my name on the form, wrote it beside the 232 number. I am the 232nd young in that list. They said Thank You before they let me passed the line. I said my good bye to Jaime when one of the assistant put me in a line reserved for only Sixteen years old. 232 is quite a long number, and I am not even the last… Only two will be chosen out of 300… only a slim of chance for me to be part of that two.

While observing what was happening around, the space are becoming tighter and tighter, hard for us to breathe properly. Well, I know to myself that my presentable looking self earlier turn to be not so presentable anymore. I also observe that everyone who is assisting us, have blonde hair, I did not see anyone, even a single one who has black or brown hair… Also they are wearing a blue jumpsuit.

After minutes, the line start moving and at the end of the line is where the young are being tested if you are healthy or not. There is a stage upstairs and full of medical wiring and monitors. Behind is a building where when you walk pass straight that building I am pretty sure you’ll end up at the capital of Quarter Two. If you are healthy, you will be sent inside the building where more testing are coming to make sure you are one of the four to be accepted in the experiment, if not, you will wlak right to exit the circle where more Jade are lined up. As I am waiting for my turn, every time I take a step forwards, my heart squeezes like a lemon, where I couldn’t breathe properly, where I felt like any moment, Ill be down. I could feel the warmth air especially wearing this white jumpsuit makes the surrounding more hotter and hotter that I could feel my sweat dripping down on my face. Even though the crowd is loud, I swear that the only thing I could hear right now, is the beat of my heart as I am seeing this line becoming shorter and shorter where I could see that I’m soon to be tested. I see some boys walk to their right, at the exit where the jade will assist them back to their house, and others are being welcome in that room behind the stage for more tests. And I hope I take a right turn…

When it is my turn, I could hear the sound of my steps as I am walking on the wooden stairs up to the stage. Once I arrived the stage, they sat me down in a white chair and grab my arm. They made me pluck my finger in a sharp metal that is connected to a monitor where it will decide my fate. I flinch when I pluck my finger in that sharp metal, my blood started dripping onto that metal, transferring my blood to a tube, connected with wires that I do not know the purpose of. After minutes of waiting, the longest feeling of waiting occurred in my life, an alarm blare where all of the nurses look to each other and panicked for a minute. With that sound blaring, it got everyone’s attention in that Circle where everyone is looking curiously what causing that alarm to activate. I am anxiously look at the crowd where everyone is staring at my direction, I am seating in the middle, here in this stage where I am pretty sure everyone has a good look at me. Whispers swirled around me, adding to my growing anxiety. The once quiet circle is now filled with hushed murmurs. the sun cast elongated shadows over us, contrasting sharply with the tension that thickened the atmosphere. But I wasn’t paying attention to the whispers, to the young, instead I care more about looking for Jaime who I can’t see from the crowd. After that center of attention moment, three Jade approached me, adorned in peculiar helmets for oxygen, wearing a leather jumpsuit, a long leather gloves, and long leather boots, all colored in scarlet red.

“Hey what is happening? Could someone explain it to me?” My voice trembled, barely audible over the pounding of my heart. Confusion is what is clouding up my head while I am being escorted out from where I was sitting. I look in the crowd and keep calling out for Jaime. It is already enough that my mother died, but this? It is too much for me to take. I continued shouting and demanding answers until they ushered me into a metal room with white walls.

The Jade left, and the metallic door shut behind me with an echoing finality. The smell of Chrysanthemum hung heavy in the sterile air, a disconcerting scent that intensified the disorientation. The room, painted stark white, seemed to amplify the palpable tension. The room was also icy, and everything is in white, the bed, the clock, the chairs, the floors, even the ceiling. Silence filled the room, and the only sound I am hearing is my own heavy breaths as I struggled to calm down. I couldn’t recognize this room, everything is new to me, I didn’t even see where they took me, they didn't enter me in the building back at the stage, they took me in right direction and couldn’t process what was happening for me to clearly remember where they took me after. I went to the Right turn like I wanted, but not at the right I was hoping for. I look back when I heard the door creaked open, an adult woman stepped in. Her blonde hair matched the others, she wears a white eye-liner with a flowy white dress. She smiled as she approached me. “Welcome,” she greeted. I asked her again, desperate for an explanation. Was I sick? Sick enough to be killed?

Her response left me feeling like I could slam myself against the walls in frustration. “No… In fact, it is the opposite my young… You’re here for the first time in decades. The last time as I could remember was when I was at your age, about 40 years ago. I’ve been waiting for this moment for so long. You're not sick, but you’re healthy enough to join our system. You are healthy enough to exceed the system of health, exceed our expectation… you are a gem my young, you are the future of the Capital.”