I wanted to melt into nothing. I swallowed through the tight knot of tears and shame in my throat and squeezing the life out of my lungs. “It’s fine,” I said, practically running out of the entrance area.
The cool evening air coasted over me as I stepped outside, easing the hot shame pressing against my skin. When I reached my SUV, I started to get in, but then noticed it seemed to be listing slightly to one side. Glancing back, I saw one of my tires was flat.
“f**k,” I muttered to myself. I needed a minute, so I climbed in my SUV and leaned my forehead against the steering wheel. “Dammit.” I bounced my forehead lightly on the padded edge of the steering wheel, feeling one tear, another, and then another roll in rapid succession down my cheeks.
I was over Joel, but I wasn’t over my stup
