Blue Plaid

Risks

In which Stella has a defining moment.

“Good morning, beautiful.”

Those weren’t words that I’d ever woken up until about two weeks ago, the exact time I started sleeping with Tyson. I hadn’t really thought much about what a relationship with Tyson would be like because mostly, I had just wanted to get in his pants, but it turned out the s*x was just a nice side benefit to the rest of it.

I still wasn’t entirely sure what we were because it wasn’t as though we’d ever had a conversation which defined our relationship, but I hadn’t pushed the issue either, because putting a label on it was quite frankly terrifying. It would make it real and I was rather enjoying this honeymoon like phase.

Blinking my eyes to adjust to the light, I slowly turned my head to the side to see Tyson standing next to the bed with his black boxer briefs riding low on his hips and his fingers curled around a mug of what I assumed was tea.

“Hey,” I groaned, keeping my head against the pillow. “How long have you been up?”

“Like half an hour,” he shrugged, bringing the mug to his lips. “I heard Cooper on the monitor so I went to go feed him.”

“Thanks, babe,” I sighed, my eyes immediately widening with horror as I realized what I had said. ‘Babe’ was the kind of endearment you used on a boyfriend and I didn’t want Tyson to think that I would automatically assume that just because we slept together, we were boyfriend and girlfriend. So I diverted his attention as quickly as possible. “Is he done with his breakfast?”

The smirk on Tyson’s lips as he nodded indicated he had heard my slip of the tongue, but he didn’t comment, his gaze drifting out to the common area. “Yep. Wanna say hi?”

Before I could respond, Tyson was already calling out to our son through the open doorway. “Hey, Coop! Come say good morning to your mumma.”

Now that we’d had multiple encounters sans clothing, Tyson had gotten into the habit of walking around the apartment in just his boxers, and although I had no objection to that because his body was actually pretty glorious, the fact that I was currently very, very naked beneath the sheets was a bit horrifying. So before something could slip and I ended up scarring Cooper for life, I bolted upright and pulled the navy cotton sheets up over my breasts, clamping them down under my armpits just as Cooper toddled into the room, a bright smile on his face, his blue eyes wide with joy.

“Mama, mama!” he called out, racing towards the edge of the bed, “Goo maawning.”

“Hey, baby,” I smiled, my voice coming out breathy because my heart was racing. Making sure the sheet was securely wrapped around me, I leaned back against the headboard to keep it held tight and held out my arms. “Come give me some love.”

He wasn’t actually tall enough to climb onto the bed himself and Tyson snickered as he recognized that I couldn’t lean forward to help Cooper without flashing him in the process, so he wrapped one arm around Cooper’s middle and lifted him effortlessly atop the mattress, sending the eighteen-month old crawling towards me.

I had just about enough time inhale deeply before he swung his arms around my neck and fell against my chest. After I had successfully cradled him in my arms, I smiled widely. “Hey, Coop…do you know what today is? It’s Christmas Eve!”

“Cwisma!” he repeated excitedly, clapping his hands together.

“Yeah!” Tyson grinned, plopping down on the edge of the bed and bringing his tea cup to his lips. “And guess what? We’re gonna see Auntie Dani tonight!”

“Yay!” Cooper squealed again, his blue eyes lighting as he smiled at Tyson. He had grown quite fond of Dani and vice versa, to the point where sometimes she even offered to babysit Cooper with us having to ask.

Pressing a quick kiss to his cheek, I lowered my voice for my next request. “Hey, buddy, will you do me a favor? Will you go keep your daddy company while he eats so mama can get ready?”

Understanding why I didn’t want to stay in the position for an extended amount of time, Tyson smirked as he pushed himself off the bed and held his arms open. “Come on, Coop. Come here.”

Cooper squirmed out of my arms, crawling towards the edge of the bed, where Tyson quickly scooped him up and turned to carry him out of the room, dropping one eye in a wink in my direction before he closed the door behind him.

I chuckled to myself once I was alone, throwing off the covers and stumbling towards the bathroom to shower and get ready for the day. The fact that I currently lived in a world where waking up naked in Tyson Kingsley’s bed was a regular occurrence was still difficult to wrap my head around.

If I was being honest with myself, it probably would have happened eventually. Even if we hadn’t ended up liking each other, our relationship had been wrought with so much tension that it would have, at some point, led to letting it out in the form of angry s*x. But the fact that we were in a s****l relationship that was entirely based in mutual respect and adoration for each other was something I had never expected.

After showering and getting dressed for the day, deciding to stick to leggings and sweater and dressing up for Dani’s party later, I walked into the kitchen to allow Tyson to get ready as well, sitting on the floor beside Cooper and watching him stack blocks on top of each other as I scooped cereal into my mouth.

Once Tyson emerged from his room, ready for the day, we decided it was much too cold to leave the apartment, so we alternated between watching Disney movies and playing with Cooper’s toys with a few snack breaks thrown in until it was time for us to get ready for the party.

It was the first formal occasion that Cooper would actually be awake for, so I was excited to dress him up in the Christmas outfit my mother had mailed me a week before. It consisted of elastic waisted blue jeans and a bright red sweater with snowflakes knitted into it and once Cooper was standing fully dressed in his room, I wanted to cry because he looked so adorable.

“Not bad, Coop,” Tyson said from where he was leaning against the door frame as I lifted Cooper into my arms. He had already changed into his party outfit of black skinny jeans, shiny black boots, and a white button up under a black zip up jacket and was now waiting for me to finish getting ready as well.

“He looks so cute, right?” I grinned, turning to hand the toddler to Tyson, pressing a kiss to his cheek before letting go of him completely.

“He does,” Tyson nodded, gathering Cooper into his arms and nuzzling his nose against the little boy’s cheeks before jutting out his lower lip in a pout. “What about me, though? Don’t I look cute?”

I rolled my eyes, placing a hand on Tyson’s crossed forearm and leaning in to kiss him quickly on the lips. “You always look cute, Kingsley.”

It was an annoyingly true fact because no matter how hard Tyson didn’t try, he always managed to look utterly delicious. I dropped one eye in a wink as I sashayed back to my room to finish getting dressed. I wasn’t sure how formal the party was, but I had an outfit I’d been dying to wear, so I decided that being a bit overdressed was always better than being underdressed.

After wiggling into my high waisted black pencil skirt and pulling on the hot pink bralet top, I slipped into black suede ankle booties before going to finish my makeup in the bathroom. Checking to make sure my eyeliner was black enough, I smudged on some nude lipstick before grabbing a black clutch and my leather jacket from the closet and stepping out into the living room to announce that we could leave.

It wasn’t until after I’d shrugged on the jacket that I lifted my gaze to meet Tyson’s, my eyebrows lifting in surprise when I found him holding Cooper in one arm, his eyes wide and his jaw completely slack. “What?”

“Damn,” he said, taking a step towards me.

My eyebrows furrowed in confusion as I reached back to tug my bedroom door shut. “What does that mean?”

Rather than respond, he took another two steps forward, cupped my cheek with his free hand and kissed me firmly on the lips, his gaze locking on mine when my eyes fluttered open afterwards, my heart racing and his lips kinking into a small smirk. “It means, damn, my girl looks amazing.”

I wasn’t sure what made my heart stop beating entirely, the look in his eyes or the fact that he’d just referred to me as ‘his girl’. Either way, I felt like I had just been hit by a semi-truck and I didn’t know what to say, so I just smiled and whispered my thanks and asked if he was ready to go.

Nodding, he lowered his hand from my cheek and gestured towards the door, and we walked down to Dani’s apartment in complete silence, me mentally wondering what the hell had just happened.

Dani was all smiles when she opened the door, ushering us in with hugs and kisses on cheeks before offering us alcoholic beverages. Since there was going to be no driving involved that evening, Tyson and I both agreed to some cider, allowing Cooper to join in on the holiday spirit by filling his sip cup with apple juice.

The other guests consisted of a few of our neighbors that we hadn’t really made an effort to get to know and some of the staff from the restaurant that Tyson used to work at and we soon settled into our own conversations after introductions were made.

“So Stella,” a girl named Helena that was a coworker of Dani’s said, plopping down next to me on the worn out red canvas couch. “Your boyfriend says you’re a model? How’d you get into that?”

My lips parted to answer the question before I fully processed what she had said, at which point, I blinked a couple times and furrowed my brow in confusion. “I’m sorry, my boyfriend?”

Turning her head, she nodded towards Tyson, who was standing beside the kitchen counter, talking animatedly to an old friend of his from Pavarotti’s, all the while keeping his peripheral vision locked on Cooper, who was quite content being the subject of adoration of all of the party guests.

“Oh, Ty’s not my boyfriend,” I replied automatically, my fingers tightening around the base of my cider bottle. It wasn’t until after the words left my mouth that I wondered if that statement was still true.

“Oh,” Helena blinked, apparently not filled in on the situation, which was understandable, seeing as she had only known Dani a few weeks, having come in to the restaurant after Tyson was fired. “I guess I assumed since Dani told me you two have a kid together.”

“Fair enough,” I smiled, my lips rounding over the rim of the cider bottle to take a swig.

“That’s cool, though,” she continued, her lips stretching into a small smile. “That you’re friends raising a kid together.”

“We’re not exactly just friends,” I admitted, not knowing why I felt the need to tell her that. Perhaps it was because the fact that I had no idea where I stood with Tyson was bothering me more than I was willing to let on.

“I see,” she smirked, glancing towards Tyson. “That sounds complicated.”

“Tell me about it,” I muttered, taking another swig of cider.

“Look,” Helena said softly, leaning in so she could speak to me quietly. “I know we don’t really know each other and you didn’t ask for my advice, but trust me, when it comes to situations involving kids, the less complicated things are between the parents, the better. So you should probably just tell him how you feel.”

That was simple enough advice, but whether I would actually have the guts to take it was a different matter. I thanked her with a smile and steered the conversation in a new direction, talking to her easily until I noticed an hour later that Cooper seemed to be falling asleep in a party guest’s lap. Excusing myself from the couch, I tiptoed across the room to scoop him into my arms, thanking the guest for keeping him occupied as I gently lay his head to rest against my shoulder.

Tyson noticed my actions from the other side of the kitchen counter, lifting his eyebrows to silently ask me what I wanted to do. Chewing on my bottom lip as I thought because it was still a bit early to leave, I shifted Cooper against my chest so that I could hold him with one arm and tapped Dani on the shoulder to ask if I could let him sleep in her bed for a bit.

She immediately agreed and pointed me towards the correct room, and I shot her a grateful smile as I headed over, Tyson close at my heels. He closed the door behind us once we entered the room and flipped on the lights, smiling softly as he watched me lay Cooper in the middle of Dani’s bed.

“He’s wiped out,” Tyson laughed softly, handing me pillows to use as buffers to keep Cooper from rolling off the bed while he slept.

“It’s his first party,” I grinned, patting down the pillows. “I’m surprised he lasted this long.”

“Knowing us, it won’t be his last, though,” he replied, shoving his hands into the pockets of his jeans as I patted the pillows one last time and stood up straight.

“Probably not,” I chuckled, reaching out to touch his arm and keep him from stepping towards the door. “Hey, can I talk to you about something?”

“Sure,” he nodded. “What’s up?”

“Ok,” I began, keeping my gaze anywhere besides connected to his. “Keep in mind, that I’ve never really had this conversation with anyone, so it’s probably gonna come out sounding cliché or awkward.”

It was a surprisingly true statement. I had never really been in a relationship before. I’d had dates and guys that I hung out with, but I’d never had the whole defining the relationship talk with any of them, mostly because I hadn’t particularly cared.

But this was Tyson. And we whether or not we were a couple, we would forever be a part of each other’s lives and if Cooper had any shot of not being royally screwed up, then the two of us needed to get our s**t together fast.

“Alright…,” he said, his lips pursing in concern. “You’re kind of scaring me a little.”

“Well, you know what, Tyson,” I shot back, crossing my arms over my chest. “Maybe that’s because I’m terrified and confused and wondering what the hell is going on between us.”

“What do you mean?” he lifted his eyebrows in surprise.

“I mean,” I inhaled deeply. “What are we? Friends with benefits? f**k buddies? Boyfriend and girlfriend?”

“I thought that was pretty obvious.”

“Not to me.” I replied, wondering how he could possibly be so cool about all of this.

“Ok,” he nodded, blinking slowly. “So why don’t you tell me what you want and that’s what we’ll be.”

I gaped at him, wide eyed. “That simple?”

“Yep,” he replied, locking his gaze on mine. “Because I know exactly how I feel about you, Stella. And if you’re not on the same page, that’s fine and I’m okay with that. All I want is you.”

It was a strange feeling, to have the ball in my court and I recognized that what I said next would forever alter the course of my relationship with Tyson. Not defining it was safe, it meant that if things eventually ended, that we’d both just agree to move on and be adults. Which would happen if a romantic relationship between us ended as well, the difference being that if I told Tyson that I wanted a real relationship, the c*****e could be a pair of broken hearts.

But I had never been one to play it safe. And maybe it would end, because lord knows that the two of us couldn’t be in the same room without it somehow disintegrating into an argument, but I had made a promise to myself a long time ago that I didn’t want to live with any regrets. I was one hundred percent sure that if Tyson and I never gave it a try, it would be something that I always regretted.

So I lifted the corners of my lips into a small smile and took a step towards him, reaching out to scratch my fingers against his chest. “I want you too. Only you. And I don’t want you to be with anyone else.”

His lips stretched into a wide grin and he removed his fingers from his pockets to place his hands at my waist, pulling me in closer. “Sounds good to me.”

“Good,” I mimicked his smile, my palms flattening against his chest. “Where does that leave us? What does this mean?”

“It means,” he leaned in, his lips brushing lightly over mine. “That I’m your boyfriend now. How do you feel about that, St. Clare?”

Widening my smile, I kissed him firmly on the mouth, thinking that calling him my boyfriend was something I could definitely get used to, but of course not something I wanted him to know just yet, so I mumbled against his lips as we kissed. “I’ll let you know.”