I Hate You... But I Lied

03 GUILT

3' GUILT

I didn't talk to him or did he to me for the rest of the day and my girl classmates kept on annoying me and asking questions about Ace the moment they knew that we were half brothers but I never entertained them.

Motherfucker! Why would they ask me!? Why won't they ask him personally.

When the bell rang for dismissal, I stood from my seat and walked out of the room immediately. I would never going ride back home with him and his car. I would rather walk to Dennis' school like I used to.

I walked to my locker and sorted my books. I only brought the ones I would be needing tonight for homeworks and stuffed it inside my bag before shutting the locker door close.

I was walking on the way to Dennis' school when a car honked behind me making me jump. I know that sound. The a-hole. I rolled my eyes and angrily walked faster while cursing Ace inside my head endlessly. I stopped walking when his car just over taked me and turned blocking my way and he almost hit me!

"What the hell are you doing!? Are you trying to hit me!?" I exclaimed then the passenger's seat window slid down and revealed his ugly face.

"Get inside." He said in a pissed off tune and he stared at me like he was really going to hit me if I wouldn't. I snorted before I went inside the passenger's seat then I leaned my back on the backrest in dislike and looked out at the window. I didn't want to see his face no matter how good looking he is.

What the hell!? He's not good looking!

I watched the window slid up, closing as the car slowly accelerates. Dennis' school was not that far from our school and I always wait for him near the guard house inside their school. Exactly, I saw Dennis laughing and running to my direction while a classmate chases him.

I chose to sit at the backseat and Dennis in the passenger seat, bacause I realized that I didn't want to sit beside him. I was only listening to the music in my earphones but I could still hear them talking like they've known each other for so long making me feel so out of place and the annoying thing was my eyes couldn't help but glance occassionally at the rear view mirror and often, I also caught Ace glancing at the mirror making out eyes met. Of course, I looked away immediately.

When we arrived, I was the first one to went out from the car and walked to the house silently. I turned around when I heard the car turned around only to see it went outside the gate. I looked at Dennis who was walking towards me.

"Where is he going?" I asked Dennis who just shrugged.

"I don't know. Maybe he have a date with a hot chick." He said and walked pass me. I glared at him then I glanced outside wondering but rolled my eyes before I went inside the house. Who cares.

After cooking for dinner, I heard dad's car. I run to the window to watch if dad's with Ace but he was alone. Ace haven't home yet and I didn't really care.

"Welcome home, dad." I said when dad entered the living room.

"How's school?" He said while he loosen his tie.

"Good. Same as usual." I smiled. I wanted to tell him about this morning but nevermind.

"How's Ace?" Dad asked.

"Um, he's fine, I guess. You can ask him." I said and turned around just to look back again. "Anyway, Ace haven't home yet. He went out after he dropped us here."

"I noticed his car isn't in the garage. Did you try calling him?" Dad glanced at his watch.

"What!? No way!" I exclaimed then realized I was over reacting. "I mean, I didn't call him and I won't. He's seventeen, he can take care of his own."

"Nineteen." Dad corrected.

"Oh." I paused. I thought we're on the same age or maybe a year older. "Noted."

Dad went to his room. Usually, he only change his office suit after we eat dinner. I climb upstairs to call Dennis for dinner when I saw dad, still in his suit, went out from his room and jogged to the front door.

"You eat dinner first." Dad said before he went outside.

Dad was sometimes like that, always in a hurry and we actually understood him because of his work but I didn't think it was work related. Maybe it was Ace? And it was making me feel uneasy and worried. We're brothers and even though he treats me differently, of course, I still worry for him. I grabbed my phone from my room and I was going to call Ace and realized that I didn't even have his number.

I ran to Dennis' room knocking his door and he never took long to open it.

"Do you have Ace's number?" I asked him and he automtically scolled his phone and handed it to me. I copied it and tapped call. "Dinner's ready." I said before placing my phone on my ear.

"Why are you calling him?" He asked as he closed his door behind him.

"Why. Can't I call him?" I raised a brow.

"Of course, you can." I heard him said when Ace's phone finally rung. After three rings Ace rejected the call making me feel pissed.

"Motherfucker. I will call you until you'll answer me." I murmured going through the history calls and called him again. I shooed Dennis to get down for dinner and he did.

"Yes?" I was surprised to hear a female voice from the other line and I could hear loud, noisy sounds. Wrong number? Maybe I mistyped one of the numbers.

"Sorry, wrong number." I said and I was about to remove my phone from my ear to end the call when I heard his voice.

"Give me that!" Ace said then the call ended.

I was surprised. He was with a girl. My lips quirked up annoyingly as I slipped my phone inside my pocket. Why did I worry about Ace anyway? I went downstairs to the kitchen and saw Dennis sitting in his place waiting for me. I sat on my place opposite to Dennis and we started eating.

I didn't know why it really pissed me off thinking he rejected and ended my call. He could really get inside my nerve so easily. I chopped my food angrily into pieces. I would never get worried of him again.

"Why are you so rude at Ace?" Dennis asked making me snap my head to look at him.

"Excuse me?" I lifted a brow. "I'm just being rude because he treats me more rudely and you know me Dennis, I always treat people the way how they treated me." I pointed my fork to him.

"But he's nice to me."

"Ask him why! Maybe he's just—" I paused when I remembered why Ace left his mom's place. I sighed and looked outside when I heard dad and Ace's car outside.

I stood when dad went inside while rubbing his forehead. He always do that when he's stressed over something or angry and pissed off.

"Dad, where have you been?" I asked and dad started pacing in the living room, back and forth.

"Ask your brother who can't even open the f*****g door!" Dad exclaimed. I walked to the double doors and opened it. Ace was standing in front of me with his dishevelled clothes and hair. He looked like he just woken up but he smell like alcohol. Ace walked passed me wobbling to the stairs.

"How did you get inside that place?" Dad said trying to calm himself. "Did you fake your age to be a member of that club!? Because I know twenty-one is the required age to be in that kind of place and if I'm not mistaken you're still nineteen. I can't believe Agnes just let you do what ever you want to!"

"Shut up!" Ace exclaimed and I just wanted to punch him right there. We haven't talked that way to dad, ever and he had the guts to talk to him like that. "You don't care! This is how I live my f*****g life so mind your own boring business!"

"You don't talk like that to my dad!" I exclaimed angrily clenching my hands to fist and walked to Ace when dad held my arm making me glance at him. "Dad."

Dad sighed and slowly shaking his head no. I glared at Ace and he also glared back at me and I didn't know but somewhere in his glare, I could see a glimpse of sadness and pain. I didn't know if I was making it or I was just seeing things and it made me feel guilty. Ace turned and we watched him climb the stairs up until he disappeared to our sight. Dad patted my shoulder before he went inside his room.

I looked at Dennis who was popping his head at the kitchen. He looked worried. I went back to the kitchen to clean up and Ace's hurt face kept on replaying in my mind and it was f*****g eating me. I went to dad's room and gave him a tray of food for dinner and a glass of water before I went to my room.

I didn't have the mood to read and study this night. I scratched my head harshly with my two hands and stood up from the chair, went outside and glanced at Ace's door. I walked silently and stopped in front of the door and my mind wavered if I should knock and talk to him which I really wanted to do that time or walk back to my room and sleep. But it would be pointless to talk to him in his state.

I leaned my back at the wall beside Ace's door thinking until I slid down stooping on the floor. Ace was wrong for going out just to screw someone and get drunk and I was sure he wouldn't be coming back home if dad didn't come and dragged him out from that place and Ace was also wrong for shouting to our dad. Maybe that was the reason why her mom didn't stop him from going away from her house. I bet she felt relieve the moment Ace stepped out of her place.

I was about to stand and walk back to my room when Dennis saw me.

"What are doing there?" He asked and I placed my index finger to my lips shh-ing him but he was Dennis and he never do shhh's. "Why, are you camping there?" I rolled my eyes and stood up beckoning him.

We both went down to the kitchen and I searched for Ibuprofen while Dennis fetched for a glass of water.

"Why did Ace went out and get drunk?" Dennis asked as he grabbed an empty glass from the divider.

I glanced at him then looked back from searching the meds, reading the names. "How the hell would I know."

"Do you think he like to live here? With us?" Dennis said as he poured water in the glass.

"What do you think?" I asked him back.

"Maybe." He said.

"Maybe?" I repeat and shrugged when Dennis nodded.

We climb back and the plan was Dennis would bring the water and meds inside because they're the 'close brothers'.

Dennis knocked a couple of times but no one answered, of course, I was pretty sure Ace was fast asleep. I twisted the knob and it wasn't even locked. I glanced at Dennis who smiled so widely. Dennis went inside and popped his head out whispering "he's asleep."

I also went inside the room and there he was. The drunken mighty Ace sleeping on his bed with his hands spreading widely from side to side, shirtless and his pants were half way down on his legs. Maybe he fell asleep before he completely removed his pants. I roamed my eyes to his average body. Mine's better I think, he's just tall. . . but seriously, the truth was his body's better than mine. What am I thinking!

"Ain't he cold? We should dress him up." Dennis said.

"No. He's sleeping without clothes." I said and pulled his pants all the way down and fold it.

"Why?" Dennis frowned.

"He's comfortable sleeping without clothes on, that's just it." I said feeling tired of Dennis' questions. I grabbed the comforter that was crushed by Ace and Dennis also helped pulling it so we could cover him.

After we placed the comforter on top of him and Dennis place the glass of water and meds at the study table, we both went to our separate rooms after we both said our good nights.

I removed my short and hang it on my chair before I laid on my bed thinking.