My Lonely Duke

I can't breathe

Hazel POV 

After my working hours are done, I drag myself back to my house. I feel great sense of relief since it is too near, I don’t know what I would have done if my workplace was far. 

I am slouching all over the way till I reach the front gate and quietly open it, then I remember that My Grandma must not be hope till now, so I continue to make all sorts of noises which are mainly coming from my feet being dragged across the road. 

I search for my keys and open the gate. I notice the change in environment immediately. It is warm and cozy and the house smells like spring. I inhale it for sometime before taking myself to the washroom. 

I know I am in need of a hot bath but I am too tired to even keep my eyes open for it. Still I wash my face and see my complexation in the mirror. The dust is still visible on my face with the tiring look. The dark circles which seemed light yesterday, seems to be visible again. 

I curse inwardly followed by crossing my finger. 

I bath seems like a good idea. 

I put the music on and fill the tub with warm water and some bath soaps. It seems bubbly and relaxing. 

Yeah this is what I need after such a first day at work. 

A ping on my phone gets my attention and I check it immediately. My Grandma has dropped a text that she would be late at home. 

Something around me changes suddenly. I feel like the air around me is sucked out. My throat feels tight and my chest starts to ache. I am trying to breath but I can’t. It’s like my brain doesn’t know how to breath. 

My heartbeat is fast and I am trying to breath as fast as possible. I placed my hand on my chest as it pains a lot. The pain is increasing every second and the air I am breathing in is staring to get less and less. For a minute I don’t notice anything around me but when I look up, everything looks faded. I wave my hand in front of my eyes so I could clear the blurry images but I can’t. 

In a few minutes it feels like I can’t breathe at all. i fall down on the ground. I bring my knees to my chest and hold them tightly. Rocking myself to and fro. I am not able to think anything, I want to scream out loud but I can’t. It looks like I have lost all my senses, my sense to see, to hear or to speak. 

I feel like I am going to faint, but I am trapped in between the state of consciousness and unconsciousness. 

After few minutes, I try to take deep breaths. My face is tear stained and I didn’t notice when I started crying. It felt like the world was ending. 

I lie in the hall, curled up. My body feels so weak now but I am glad that whatever it was it has passed. I don’t know if I will be able to get up from the floor soon, but I have to before my Grandma comes back. 

I don’t know what just happened. What I just felt but it was so scary. 

I am still crying and terrified. 

WHY?

I slowly pick myself up from the floor and reach the basin to wash my face. I threw water on my face for countless time. The cold water on my face is the only thing which is making me feel that I didn’t just imagine everything. 

I push one step after the other and move towards my room. I have lost my appetite, so I just move towards my bed to sleep. 

I don’t know if I should worry my Grandma with this, she looks relaxed but with her age, anything could happen. 

Maybe tomorrow would be a different day.