Feel of Her: A Lesbian Romance

Chapter 3

Chapter 3Christina hobbled into her apartment and literally collapsed on the sofa. Two weeks back at work had lifted her spirits and helped dispel the gloom that she had been living under. Everyone treated her like she was the same, no one ever mentioned the accident or her leg or offered to help her unless she obviously needed it.

She hadn’t seen much of Sandra. After their lunch, the young woman had become slightly distant. Christina was sure it was because of her stated attraction and she pondered what she should say to put Sandra at ease as she removed the prosthesis and sleeve. She immediately grabbed the thick red sock she wore over it and pulled it on, not even looking down.

Her stump had some nerve damage and besides the pain she often felt, it always seemed to be cold. Her mother had crocheted the sock for her and she wore it religiously. She didn’t think she would ever get comfortable without something over it.

She went to make coffee, her mind returning to her lovely boss and the problem of how to break the barrier that seemed to be forming between them. She couldn’t seem to find the words to let he beautiful girl know how flattered she had been. Not without encouraging her and Christina didn’t want to do that. Well, maybe she didn’t. She had to admit, Sandra was stunning and a wonderful companion. She had been having some strange dreams of coming home to her and vice versa. Some of them had been sweet and romantic, but some had been downright raunchy.

She found it easier to just hop around the kitchen. She had laid out the furniture so there was always a convenient hand hold and everything was arranged for ease of access. The counters had been lowered and wherever she needed her brother, Teddy had installed hand rails. She had just settled back in on the faux leather sofa when the door buzzer rang.

“Hello?” she responded as she pressed the intercom.

Christina was used to this, although she almost never got visitors, people always rang her by mistake, or her neighbors would ring if they locked themselves out.

“Christina?”

“Sandra?”

“Yes. I...I hope you don’t mind, but I was in the neighborhood…”

“Not at all, please come on up,” she replied, hitting the blue button to open the grill.

She was humming happily to herself when it suddenly dawned on her that this was very strange. She almost jumped out of her skin when she heard a knock on the door. She started to stand before she remembered she didn’t have her prosthesis on. Shrugging, she hoped over to the door and opened it.

Christina tried to speak, but her tongue kept stumbling over the words. Sandra was absolutely breathtaking. Instead of business attire, she wore a simple black dress, of raw silk. It had a fitted bodice and fell to just below her knee. Pearls highlighted it and high stiletto heels showed off her delicate ankles. Her hair was up and her makeup looked professionally done, almost like she had none on.

“I hope I’m not intruding,” she said softly.

Christina could only shake her head an open the door more. Sandra entered in a graceful swirl of silks brushing against the door and Christina’s hand.

“Can I get you something?” Christina asked, finally finding her voice.

“Anything, as long as it’s strong,” she replied as she sat on the sofa.

“Rum and coke?” Christina asked as she gingerly made her way into the kitchen.

“Rum, forget the coke, if you don’t mind.”

Christina fixed them both a drink, adding half a can of coke to hers, before sliding them across the counter and making her way around to the other side of her cutaway. She handed Sandra her drink and then took her own and carefully sat on the other end of the sofa.

Sandra killed half the tumbler in one gulp.

“Jeeze, go easy, that’s 101 proof.”

“I can take it.”

“Honey, what’s wrong?” Christina asked.

“Everything, nothing, f**k if I know,” Sandra replied.

“Well, that tells me a lot,” Christina said, with a faint smile.

She had hoped it would provoke a smile from Sandra, but the younger woman gave her a deeply penetrating stare.

“f**k, if I know,” she said at last, killing most of her drink.

Christina just waited. Apparently, the young woman was working up to something. After a few moments she turned to Christina and scooted closer to her, placing her hand on the older woman’s bare knee.

“I came here tonight to ask you out. I swear, you’re the most enigmatic woman I’ve ever met. Some girls you can tell they are, some you can tell they aren’t, but you…damned if I know. So I’ll just do this a less romantic way than I had planned. Christina, I think you’re hot, I’d love to take you out. Are you interested at all?” she said earnestly.

Christina was taken aback. She had considered that might be the reason Sandra was here, but had dismissed the idea. Now, here it was, and she didn’t know what to say. Truth be told, she didn’t know what she wanted either. Sandra was staring into her eyes and waiting impatiently for some response. Eventually Christina plucked up her courage and replied.

“No, I’m not interested in going out,” she said, watching the disappointment spread across Sandra’s pretty features.

“But,” she said quickly, before Sandra could respond, “But, I’d love to watch a movie with you, if you don’t mind staying in,” she finished, blushing deeply.

Sandra smiled radiantly and nodded.

“I’d love to, but I need to go down to the car and move it. Have you got a movie you want to watch or should I run down to the rental place?”

“I don’t have any I haven’t seen a million times.”

“Great, I’ll be back soon.”

“Video or Dvd?” She asked, pausing in the door.

“VHS, I’m old fashioned.”

After Sandra was gone, Christina made her way into the bedroom. She stopped before her dresser and looked at herself in the mirror.

“Have you any idea what you’re doing?” she asked her reflection melodramatically.

“No, and neither have you,” she replied.

A smile creased her face, raising little laugh lines around her eyes. She had never been classically beautiful, but she had been pretty in her younger days. Her long brown hair was still soft and showed only a few grays. Her body was fuller, more womanly and less girlish, but still attractive, except for the fact she had no leg.

“Oh, what are you doing?” she cried, throwing her hands up and burying her face in them.

When the buzzer rang, she almost decided not to touch it, but she rang Sandra up, realizing she had to see the girl again at work Monday. Sandra let herself into the apartment, and held up three tapes.

“I wasn’t sure what you were in the mood for,” she said with a grin.

“What’d you get?” Christina asked.

“Couple of chick flicks, how does a good romance grab you?”

The last thing Christina wanted was to watch someone meet the guy of her dreams and have everything work out. It wasn’t that she wished evil on others, but she just knew such a film would have her depressed before it was done.

“I’m not really…” she started before Sandra cut her off.

“You’re not in the mood to see people living happily ever after.”

“Well…” she stammered, feeling embarrassed.

“No problem. I also picked up a good murder mystery, how’s that work?”

“Great,” Christina said enthusiastically.

Sandra put the movie in and dimmed the lights. Christina was sitting on the sofa and Sandra, pulled her dress up, curled a leg under her and plopped down next to her. Christina couldn’t help but notice the brief flash of shapely stocking clad thighs and garters. From the plastic bag in her hand Sandra pulled out a bag of popcorn with the video place’s logo on it.

Christina nibbled on the popcorn and sipped her drink. She was touched that Sandra had anticipated her needs and didn’t seem at all judgmental about her not wanting to watch a romance. The movie had a creepy killer and lots of suspenseful scenes. Christina noticed they had slowly scooted closer to one another. During one particularly cheap “boo” shot, they both jumped and grabbed one another.

Christina let go immediately, but Sandra kept her arm around the older woman’s shoulders. She was staring intently at the television, so it could just be she was still spooked, but it didn’t feel that way to Christina. The soft strong arm and the warmth of Sandra’s body against her own provoked some serious introspection.

She hadn’t realized just how lonely she had been or how strong the inclination to just snuggle up and let Sandra hold her would be. On the other hand, she knew Sandra was gay and she was afraid it would be akin to leading her on. She loved the free spirited young woman, but she wasn’t sure she loved her in a physical way. What really bothered Christina was the fact she wasn’t sure. She had resigned herself to living alone for the rest of her life and entertaining feelings for Sandra was causing a lot of turmoil.

She couldn’t make herself hope that someone could love her despite her maimed leg. It just wasn’t fair to Sandra. She just couldn’t understand why Sandra seemed to have no problem with it. And that lead her back to wondering if maybe, just maybe, things could work out with her.

“You’ll never know, till you try,” she thought.

“What?” Sandra asked.

“Nothing!” Christina replied, embarrassed beyond words at having voiced that thought out loud.

Feeling trapped under Sandra’s intense gaze, she reacted instinctively and snuggled in close, lying her head on the girl’s shoulder and thus avoiding her eyes. Sandra smiled and returned to watching the movie. As the climax neared, Christina found herself snuggling in tighter and when the heroine opened the door to her home and the killer stepped out of the closet they both jumped. As the credits rolled, Sandra got up, threw the popcorn bag away, carried the glasses to the kitchen and then rewound the movie.

She put it back in the case and glanced at her watch.

“I guess I better be going. Would you mind returning the tapes?”

“No, not at all,” Christina replied.

“Great,” Sandra said as Christina stood with difficulty and saw her to the door.

“I…I had a great time,” The young woman said after some hesitation.

“So did I,” Christina replied quietly.

The moment was pregnant as they stared at each other. Christina felt herself trembling in a mix of expectation and fear. She wondered if Sandra would try to steal a goodnight kiss. Part of her was actually hoping she would, but she just smiled, gave Christina a big hug and left. Christina was kicking herself long after she had gone to bed for not taking the initiative and offering one. It had been the first night in two years where she could honestly say she had enjoyed herself.