Alpha's Spoiled Princess - Burgov Series VI

9. Cilia

I swayed to the music with a generous glass of sangria in my hand, starting singing only when the chorus came in. For all the s**t I remember, the song's lyrics were never the thing.

This was another Thursday, my chosen day for self-pity. That's right, I gave him one day a week of occupying my thoughts, even though he doesn't even deserve that much, and it took me many, many bottles of Rioja to understand that.

I took another long swing, allowing the lyrics blazing from the speaker to consume me. It felt like this woman lived through my life. It's almost sad how many scumbags there are, just waiting to use women and stomp on their hearts on the way of our lives.

But f**k it, the chorus is here, and I get to actually sing alongside her, even though my voice is able to kill birds on nearby trees.

Here I am, once again.

I'm torn into pieces

Can't deny it, can't pretend

Just thought you were the one

Broken up, deep inside

But you won't get to see the tears I cry

Behind these hazel eyes

I screamed from the top of my lungs, allowing a single tear to slip down my cheek. He isn't here, so it's a free game. At least for today.

But before the verse could start, my music suddenly got turned off. I spun on my heel, startled by the sudden silence just to come face to face with smiling dark eyes.

"Tus ojos no son color avellana. Lo sabes, si?" (Your eyes aren't hazel. You know that, right?) - Alejandro said, crossing his arms with a playful smirk.

"No me asustes, Lalo!" (Don't scare me, Lalo.) - I said, gripping my chest.

He chuckled and sauntered to my phone, where, without so much as a question, he started shuffling through my playlist.

"Que haces?" (What are you doing?) - I asked, but he only glanced my way with mischief in his almost black eyes.

"Buscando alho mas bailable." (Looking for something more danceable.) - he said with his blinding smile, pressing play and outstretching his hand for me.

I recognized Ed Sheeran's Shape of you and threw my head back and laughed, especially when Alejandro started swaying his hips coming closer to me. He snatched my sangria off my hand and placed it on the dresser's top and he left me an option to object, grabbing my hand and twirling me around.

What is it about those Latinos that they move like a dream? It's like they were born with looser joints and Salsa already in their blood. Even Lalo, who barely went through puberty, can move like a professional dancer, making it hard to keep up with him. But at least he had me laughing with each misstep I made trying to keep up with him. He was everywhere, next to me, in front of me, behind me, pulling me in and pushing away all perfectly in sync with the rhythm, until the song came to an end and I was panting hard.

Still keeping me in his arms, he brushed the dried tear off my cheek and grinned.

"That's better." - he said with a thick accent.

"We can speak Spanish if you prefer." - I offered, catching my breath.

"Naa, Papa says I need to practice, and what better person to do it with than you?" - he said with a wink and leaned down to kiss my hand.

He's a charmer. Very dangerous at that. And I know there will be hearts broken all around the European packs, when he comes of age and settles with some nice girl who can feel the rhythm better than I do.

"What brings you here, Lalo?" - I asked.

"I volunteered to check up on you." - he said with a shrug, and went back to the living room's entrance, where he left groceries that I hadn't noticed before. - "And I brought this."

"My savior!" - I exclaimed theatrically, putting my hand on my forehead, and he started laughing, going to the kitchen where I followed him.

It wasn't an everyday occurrence that I had company. Most of the time, I was left to my own thoughts in the summer home of the de la Cerda family on Cabrera Island, with a rocky coast, turquoise sea and sun as my only companions.

After I called Alpha Ramiro, Letitia's father, he went above and beyond to bring me to his pack. In a matter of two hours since the call, I boarded the private plane he chartered and I was on my way across the Atlantic. Once he saw me, Ramiro embraced me, letting me cry my eyes out before I told him pieces and bits of what happened and that, plainly speaking, I needed a place to stay and think, away from my brother, away from my family, away from my mate.

Lettie's father is a hard-headed man, he's as stubborn as any Alpha, but somehow woman's tears are his only kryptonite and he was simply unable to leave me to my own fate. Besides, he has had a soft spot for me ever since I stopped my brother from attacking his pack, pointing out that they could either fight, with both of them losing in the end, no matter if it was going to be their lives or Lettie's love. I showed them they could go their separate ways as winners, my brother with his mate, and Ramiro with a new contract for all the natural riches they'd been harvesting and a happy daughter who would be treated as a queen. I also promised Ramiro to stay by Letitia's side all throughout her first months in the Dark Woods, helping her with transition into her new role, keeping him posted all through it.

Igor wasn't happy. He already thought of Lettie as his and only his, with no regard to her father's fears. I, however, saw a frightened parent behind Ramiro's hard stare, and putting myself in his shoes, I wouldn't be too prone to letting go of my eldest daughter so easily either. So I tried making everyone happy, and in the process I formed something close to friendship or at least deeply rooted respect between me and Alpha de la Cerda.

We talked on occasion and I made sure to always remember his birthday and anniversaries, sending my regards and gifts. Such a simple sign of respect, but for a proud man like Ramiro, it meant the world. Especially when he saw that not all Orlovs were hot-headed cockscombs and barbarians. And so it went like this, with me sending him pretty trinkets or bottles of the best wine I found during my journey, and him telling me I should make a stop in his pack, which I sincerely planned to do, but maybe not like that.

I knew that if there was one person in this world who wouldn't be afraid to omit my visit in his home to my brother, it would be Ramiro. The two barely ever spoke anyway, and even if they did, it was because Leticia asked them to and neither dwelled for too long or split his soul to the other. Actually, if they managed a conversation without insults, it was considered a big success.

But even though Ramiro didn't think twice before taking me in, he correctly pointed out I couldn't stay in his Pack House if I wanted to keep my visit a secret from Igor. That's when he offered me their summer home. A secluded villa, away from the main continent, that my brother probably didn't even know about. A perfect place to give me time to think about my life.

The first two weeks were the worst. I cried non stop, with Letitia's siblings doing rounds around me, as if I were a fragile child.

After that, my sister-in-law flew over bringing Rodin with her. My brother, of course, didn't follow. He never does whenever she visits her family. So we had two days to catch up and for me to get acquainted with my nephew, who must be the cutest boy in the world and the only thing Igor has done perfectly in his life.

Leticia and I were always friendly, but after she became the second person to whom I confined my deepest heartaches, it felt like we were finally real sisters.

She told me that only time can mend a broken heart, and that I should take all the time that I need to feel strong again, before making a decision. And when asked how I would know that I'm strong enough, she said that the day will come when my heart no longer hurts and my eyes stay dry. And I think I'm getting there.

Alejandro has definitely been a highlight of my stay here, too. As the youngest of six and the only boy, he had his fair share of women's dramas, and he could find his way around it like a professional. The merry sixteen-year-old took it upon himself to come at least once a week and cheer me up with his jokes and sunny demeanor that were positively infectious. Lettie's brother picked me up from my worst, while my own was none the wiser in his lavish Palace on the other side of the continent. In moments like this, I wish I had been born into literally any other family than mine.

"I brought fruits, bread, coffee and Abuela sent her Gazpacho and roasted octopus for dinner." - Lalo said, unpacking the bags.

"I think I'm in love. If only you were ten years older." - I said teasingly, like we always do.

He looked back at me and grinned.

"Age is just a number, Reinita, and it doesn't ensure maturity." - he winked and I looked down at my hands.

"No, I guess it doesn't." - I admitted with a sigh.

I heard his footsteps getting closer and he tilted my head up until I was looking into his brown eyes, but thankfully not exactly the same shade as Sean's. Alejandro's were darker, almost completely black, and I was glad for that small difference. I was invaded with too many thoughts and memories of Sean as it is.

"Making a woman like you sad should be considered a crime." - he said - "That man is a fool."

"How do you know there is a man?" - I asked, forcing my lips to curl up, so that I could hide my true emotions behind this half-assed smile.

"I may be young, Cilia, but I'm not stupid." - he said - "Whenever there's a woman crying her eyes out, there's also a fucker responsible for it."

"How do you know you're not that fucker to someone?" - I asked challengingly, hoping it would get him off my back.

"Because my five sisters would have skinned me alive." - he grinned and stepped back, going for the cabinet to fetch an extra glass and pouring himself some of my sangria. - "And besides, as I said before, I'm not stupid. I can recognize a treasure when I see one, and you, Senorita Orlov, are the rarest gem of all. Men should be killing themselves for a second of your time, and those who are not, aren't worth it" - Lalo said, tipping his glass up and taking a sip.

Oh, this boy was very smooth. I've met dozens of confident young Alphas during my endeavors, but none were as skilled at getting into women's pants as those with hot latino blood in their veins.

I know I shouldn't take this teenage flirt too seriously, but he pointed out one very important detail. Apparently, there are men able to see me as a prize, not an inconvenience, like Sean did.

My heart still sinks every time I think about what I heard. I've been over this in my head a thousand times, desperately wanting to find something to grab onto, something that would justify him. But he laid out his priorities quite clearly. He was going to deal with his life next to me, just to avoid problems and biffs within a family.

But that wasn't something noble to do. My mate shouldn't see me as the lesser evil. I want love and passion and a house filled with laughter, not forced smiles and obligatory s*x, no matter how great it is. And since my mate is unable to give me his love and devotion, I'm not going to settle for the scraps of his attention.

"You look like you were a thousand kilometers away." - Alejandro said, pulling me out of my own thoughts.

"If only." - I snorted.

"Then how about I refill your glass…" - he said, pouring the rest of the sangria pitcher into the glass I was holding. - "And reheat octopus, huh?"

"Someday you will make one lady very happy." - I smiled at the young guy, who didn't get shy, only grinned slyly.

"Just one word and it could be you, Cilia." - he said with a wink, making me laugh like there was no tomorrow.

"Call me in five years, and if I'm still single, then we can talk." - I said, taking my glass off the counter and going back to the living room, taking my favorite spot on the sofa, in front of the terrace door through which I could see the calming waves crashing onto the shore.

No matter where life takes me, I would definitely want to have a beach house to visit from time to time. There's something therapeutic in hearing the soft murmur of the sea and basking yourself in the sun. Maybe that's what I've been missing in the Dark Woods. It was too cold there. Literally and figuratively speaking.

My phone rang and I smiled to myself, seeing Markella's name. There weren't that many options, only she, Lettie and a few of de la Cerda family members had this number. I made it my point to disconnect myself from the world I left behind.

"Hey girl." - I answered.

"Hey yourself." - she answered, sounding exceptionally cheerful.

Markie and Orson had a good life and good relationship. It wasn't perfect, but at least they were on the same page facing everything that life throws their way together. Just like it should have been. And as I can see from my best friend's example, that's all it takes to make a girl happy.

"How's it rolling, preggo?" - I giggled.

"I'm no preggo anymore, honey."

"What?!" - I yelled, sitting up straight. - "You had a baby?"

"Yes. And I'm proud to announce that both me and Orson survived it. Although, your cousin was on his way to a near death experience." - Markie grumbled.

"Oh, do tell. You know I'm always up for small, innocent family shaming."

She giggled, before answering.

"Oh, you know him. He was overly excited, as per usual. And he thought that me being in labor was a best moment to push his ridiculous name ideas."

"Oh, no. Don't tell me you agreed to Person." - I said, covering my mouth in fear that my stupid cousin had scared his son before he even learned to walk..

"Oh f**k, no. But either way, he's on a different idea now."

"What…"

"Trust me, you don't wanna know." - she cut me off with an edge of her voice that said she didn't want to talk about it..

"Okay, if you say so." - I caved to have it her way. Knowing Orson, he chose another ridiculous name, as if he hated his child already. - "So why didn't I get the photo yet?"

"Because I'm still in the hospital, and the only ones I have on my phone are with my boobs in it, so I chose to spare you." - she said with a chuckle.

"Well, I've seen your boobs, so that's barely an excuse for me." - I pointed out.

"Fine." - she huffed - "I only now got my phone, and I didn't want to send it from Orson's number, because… You know why."

I sighed, placing my forehead against my knees. Yes, I did know, because he could unsuspectingly give it to Sean.

"I know." - I admitted sadly. - "So how do you feel?"

"Good. And I really hope my vajayjay heals properly. Orson almost cried when he saw the m******e the baby did."

"He's a baby himself." - I said, rolling my eyes. - "I wish I had been there with you, if only to put my cousin in his place." - I added, more solemnly.

Missing out was the only thing why I regretted being away. And moments like this, Markella having her first baby, was the exact thing I should have been present for.

"About that… We're having a family dinner combined with Pack's celebrations. I hope you can be here."

I didn't know how to respond.

Of course, I wanted to be there for my best friend. No! My sister.

But was I ready to go back? Absolutely not.

"Markie…"

"Before you make an excuse, you need to know that Orson and I both hope you can be a Goddess-mother of our firstborn. So you have to be here."

"Oh, my Goddess, Markie! That's huge. You aren't choosing Uliana?" - I gasped.

"Cilia, I love Uliana, she's a wonderful girl, but you're the one for me. I wouldn't leave my pup to anyone else. Well, maybe Sasha, because damn, that woman can cook." - she said with no doubt in her voice. - "Please tell me you accept."

"Yes. Of course I do." - I nodded, because the moment called for it. - "But now you really can't give him some ridiculous name."

Markie started laughing hysterically.

"Trust me, I'm working on it." - she said, and I started wondering if it's possible to love the small pup I haven't even met, because it sure as hell felt like I was more than ready to slice anyone who dared to touch the little VanWoert.

"But there's one more thing." - Markie said more carefully, weighing her every word.

"Oh?"

"Orson chose Sean for our boy's Goddess-father. I know how you feel about him, but he did it while I was asleep and there's nothing I can do about it now…"

I stopped listening more or less after his name was dropped.

If I choose to go through with it, I will have to face him. It was sooner than I hoped it would happen, but either way, I knew this day was coming.

Should I back down?

Probably.

But then again, it's me who shares blood with this pup, and it's me who has a connection going even deeper with its mother. So no, I'm not going to back down.

"Markie, stop." - I cut her off. - "I don't care. I might comment on Orson's poor judgment, but that's it. And hopefully he'll freeze to death from his icy heart before the day comes." - she chuckled - "When is the party?"

"Next Saturday." - she said. - "But are you sure you're going to be fine?"

There was a deep concern in her voice, the one I loved her even more because of.

"I will. I just have to put on my b***h face and ignore him."

"He's coming over on the day of the party. So why won't you come sooner?" - she suggested, and I smiled.

It's a great feeling to have someone in your corner and Markella is the most loyal woman in the world.

"You know what, I think I will. But I have to go and think about my surprise. You know I hate coming over empty-handed." - I said with a wicked smirk forming on my face.

"Why does it feel like you aren't talking about designer onesies?" - she asked cautiously.

"Because I'm not."

"Should I purchase a kevlar vest or something?" - she asked.

"Don't be ridiculous. I'll be good. Mostly." - I said, with a smile forming on my lips.

"Fine. But no fire in a house with a newborn!" - she warned.

"Yes, Mama Wolf."

We ended our conversation and I sat alone for a couple of minutes thinking about what to do.

I for sure can't show Sean that he got the better of me. I not only have to look my best, but I need to prepare something big that will rub his nose till it's raw. I have to be above him.

Putting on a show is what I know best, even though I always despised it. But from what I know, Sean thinks that's my safe zone. But what should it be?

"Why do you look like you were about to set the world on fire?" - Alejandro's voice came from the doorway, where he stood with two plates in his hands.

"I have to go back to the States and meet Mr fucker" - I answered.

"Ah, so the world is safe, only one fool will burn." - he commented with a smile, coming closer and putting my plate in front of me. - "If you want, I could go with you, make him jealous and all."

"I love the way your brain works, Lalo, but that's not enough. He needs to know that, how you put it, others would kill to be in his place…"

And then the answer became obvious.

I jumped off my spot on the sofa, nearly knocking down the coffee table, if it wasn't for Alejandro's quick reflex, but I didn't care, my brain was already working on the highest gears.

I reached for my phone and I dialed the last, no, second to last number, I thought I wouldn't be calling any time soon. He answered even though he never did to unknown numbers, but I chose to blame it on my lucky day.

"I need a favor and before you say no, remember you owe everything you have to me." - I said in Russian and I waited for his response with bated breath.

"Hello Brother would be a better greeting, but I guess we're past that. What do you need, sister?" - Igor answered and I grinned, knowing that I would bring the ultimate ex revenge on poor Alpha Maslow.

And he thought he was a match for an Orlov.