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(Johnnie) What the hell was I doing?! I can't believe I snuggled up with Caspian again..but this time willingly..oh my gosh..Anna is going to flip the hell out when I fill her in. Last night though..it was probably one of the best nights I've had in years. Caspian was just like his old self..we laughed and talked for hours..even though he was still pretty drunk..I even made him a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and he made me feed it to him. I had never seen him so carefree and happy..and then I began to wonder if getting all of that off of his chest was what he needed all of these years. Holding a secret like that in..I can understand why he was so hateful and pushed everyone away. It was like he became a shell of himself and only anger was left to fill him. I myself felt guilty a