Watching her eat with uninhibited pleasure excited me. She has no idea her government is full of crap about their food supplies. I saw what the leaders ate and it wasn't the garbage they fed us. They might package and save some of their crops, but the best selection goes to the entitled few. This was another reason I respected Marinah's father. He ate with his troops no matter how revolting the food was. The man also didn't have to lead his men on the battlefield. He could have sat in an office, taken reports, and given orders to be carried out by someone else. But he cared about his men, and the manner of his death showed his feelings went far beyond human compassion.
But now I'm wondering who exactly Marinah is and how dedicated she is to the Federation. There's no simple answer. I'm American. I grew up on a farm, was raised by my father, and had no idea what I was until my tenth birthday when he sat me down and explained the truth.
I listened, thinking it was a joke even though my father rarely made jokes. I didn't believe what he said until he stripped off his clothes and changed into a monster that you only see in horror films. Loving him didn't stop me from running away in fear. I placed my dresser in front of my bedroom door and refused to leave the room. He waited until I fell into an exhausted sleep and pushed open the door.
I carried so much fear those first weeks. Sadly, the fear slowly turned to anger. I wanted to be like the kids from school. I didn't want to be some alien species and hide from humans. I resented that he only told me the truth because it was time for me to be home schooled and leave my friends behind. My life turned from studying math and English to controlling my constantly changing monster to human body, meditating to suppress bursts of rage, and learning to hide my beast away.
I studied Shadow Warrior history with resentment-my childhood was shattered and the bright world of a young boy turned to an angry cage of shame. I didn't care where we came from and I hated my father for forcing something on me that I considered hideous. It was his fault that I carried a monster inside me. When puberty began and Beast started making an appearance, I hated myself more than anyone. I wasn't a superhero. I was a freak who had to curtail eating meat to keep the monster at bay. I was a growing boy and constantly in need of extra calories, which made me hungry all the time. Even today I have a thing about food. I never want to feel that gnawing hunger that stayed with me every waking hour when I was growing up.
From the time my father told me our secret to my teenage years, I couldn't talk with a civil tongue. I destroyed my room in one fit of rage and the kitchen in another. I ran away twice. The day my uncle arrived changed my life. My father could no longer handle my rebellion and thought his brother might be able to talk sense into me. Greystone did the opposite. He secretly taught me to embrace Beast. He believed we wouldn't be in hiding forever.
Through the years, Greystone had slowly changed the lives of young, dysfunctional Shadow Warriors. The older men like my father didn't agree. Even when bombs began destroying everything in their path and the first hellhounds attacked, my father continued farming and trying to remain what he was never designed for.
Greystone had been training Shadow Warriors as young as twelve. He'd prepared me to help him early on, and I excelled at teaching boys to fight and embrace their beasts. Men like my father finally came out of their self-imposed holes when it was clear humankind could not win the war against the hellhounds without our help. I didn't agree with sending the older men, who had hidden their inner beasts for generations, but I respected my uncle's decisions. They went off to war and the rest of us trained to survive no matter the outcome to humans.
We lost so many Shadow Warriors, but my uncle was right-our survival depended on our ability to adapt and always had. I didn't fight with humans until the last two years of the war. My father died soon after I joined the ranks of fighting Warriors. My uncle survived the main war only to die in the battle with humans when they tried to contain us. Saying I hate them is a mild understatement. There's no human word for how I feel.
I study the change in Marinah's expression and the words tumble out, "How badly do you want to live?" I don't wait for her response-the shock on her face is enough. "I don't trust the Federation and I have no idea why they sent you of all people to iron out our differences." She straightens in her chair and the gold flakes in her dark eyes intensify. I hold up my hand. "Hear me out." She sucks in a heavy breath and remains silent. "When it comes to fighting hellhounds, Shadow Warriors have the upper hand. We're good at killing them and we're stronger than humans."
"I won't argue that," she says.
I grunt because she has no idea what she's really talking about. "The Federation sent you for a reason. I'm assuming they asked you to spy on us, count our numbers, our weapons, and so on and I remember your father saying you were good with numbers." Pink slides up from her neck and enters her cheeks, I hold up my hand and stop her reply again. "Lying won't change my opinion."
She shakes her head. "I wasn't going to lie. You're right about all of it."
I'm thrown off guard, but she needs to know how her visit will go if she's lucky and follows the rules or unlucky and doesn't. "It's my job to kill you if you discover our secrets. I could lie and tell you we have none and both of us would know it's not true. You may not have a fighting bone in your body," I say, though I don't want to mention I could change that again. "But you are intelligent. We're keeping you away from our people. This facility," I wave a hand around us, "is all you're allowed to see for now." I lean in closer so she understands every word I say. "If you discover our secrets, it's my job to kill you and I will do it with relish. I don't like humans and my Shadow Warriors are all on the same page." I place my hand on the table and she watches as I make a fist. "Don't make me kill you. Who knows who they'll dream of sending to replace you."
She fidgets slightly, so I'm assuming I've made my warning clear.
Her head lifts and I see unexpected fire in her eyes. Through clenched teeth she speaks. "If death is all you have to threaten me with, be assured I didn't expect to survive this trip." I can hear the truth in her speech, but she isn't done. "Is this my room?"
"No."
"Do I have a room available or do you plan to put me back in the room that nearly killed me?"
I manage not to grin at her bravado. "I'll see you to your room. It's probably more comfortable than your quarters back home. Guards will be posted outside your door whenever you're inside and they will stay with you when you leave your room. You have free run of this floor and the bottom floor. The pool, which is on the basement level, is unavailable for you. There are places outside these walls I can take you when I'm not busy. You won't leave here without me. Not all of my warriors can be trusted with you and I've handpicked the ones inside our current walls. They may not like you, but they won't kill you without my permission. Understand, they'll never receive that order because I will handle the deed myself."
She shivers and grabs her arms in exaggerated fear. "You had me at killing me the first time. I'm tired and my stomach is full. Would it be possible to go to my room so the intimidation can stop?"
The woman has balls.