The Unflinching Collection

Chapter 15

Elisabeth stood at the graveside, head down, lips moving in prayer. Beside her, the two young men, with their wives, and another older man, a farmhand. Their hands were clasped in front, eyes closed, the silence in that desolate place palpable.

They buried the old man, with the maid alongside. A simple wooden cross marked their respective places. Engraved into the wood were the dates of their death. Nothing more. No names, no epitaph. A further mound announced a previous death, two years earlier. Elisabeth assumed it must be the burial place of the young men"s mother. She didn"t ask, did not think it appropriate, not now with their grief so profound.

They trailed back to the house in silence and when they stepped inside, they all stopped and surveyed the mess. Shattered furniture, upturned tables and chairs, broken crockery, family heirlooms, and bullet holes in the walls, allowing shafts of brilliant sunlight to lance through the dusty air, a latticework of light.

Once Mason escaped with Newhart in the wagon, the young men, biting back their tears, gathered up the bodies of the dead, and set about digging the graves. Now, as Elisabeth looked on, they all set about clearing the debris. Their strength and dignity, in the face of such loss, moved her to tears. It was some moments before she joined them.

Much later, the older farmhand served up a thin gruel of beans and potatoes, tasteless, lukewarm. Nobody raised a voice of objection. No one spoke, the slurping of soup and munching of bread the only sounds. Grief was now part of their family.

In the cool of the late evening, one of the women motioned Elisabeth to join her out on the porch. They sat and looked out across the prairie, a myriad of stars twinkling across the blackness, in the distance a coyote making a plaintive howl. Elisabeth dabbed at her forehead with a kerchief, the heat oppressive, constant. The woman smiled. “My name is Ann.” She reached over and took Elisabeth"s hand in a smooth, firm grasp and Elisabeth smiled in return. “We are a simple family, with…” Ann stopped, biting her lip and her breathing juddered as she caught a sob in her throat. When she continued, her voice had lost its former confidence, the pain of her loss taking its toll. “I"m sorry, we were a simple family, living out here in the wild, tending our cattle. My husband Job and his brother Jacob, together with Sarah, his wife. And father Joseph, of course. A tower of strength he was, a man of virtue and wisdom. He was our guide, our rock. And now, he is gone.”

were“Those men,” said Elisabeth, quickly, trying to prevent the woman from breaking down over the enormity of what had happened, “they took me by the barrel of a g*n, left my own father for dead. For all I know, he is dead. They took me and they brutalized me, out on the prairie, every night. Mason, the one whom I tried to kill, he was the worst. A devil.”

is“God will bring down his wrath, sister. Have no fear.”

Elizabeth brought up her fists, clenched tight, the knuckles showing white under the skin, her voice trembling as she spoke, “Then why did He not strengthen my hand, my aim? I fired six shots, not one struck home.”

“There is always a purpose, sister. Do not fret yourself. Justice will be done.”

Elisabeth rested her head against the ranch house wall and closed her eyes briefly. She was no longer certain if justice would ever be done. Mason seemed invincible, protected by forces far stronger than anything Ann proclaimed. Nothing sent by God. Mason"s violations, excesses and brutality were not human. A beast, sent from hell to reap c*****e and suffering to all who crossed his path. That was how she saw him, and she could think of no reason why her thoughts might be wrong. “Justice will be served when I see him dead, in the ground, his heart torn out.”

Ann placed her hand on Elisabeth"s knee and squeezed. “We are all suffering right now. It will pass. We shall never forget, but the pain will leave and then we will look upon the world with a clearer vision. You"re grieving, sister, as we all are. Give it time.”

Elisabeth ground her teeth, accepting the wisdom of this woman"s words, but not liking what she heard. Her hatred for Mason was the one thing which forced her to survive, to greet each new day with a renewed desire to kill him. All through his constant pounding, those rough hands pawing at her flesh, his slack lips rolling over her mouth, his flanks heaving and thrusting, the image of his death gave her the strength to suffer him. Even when revulsion turned to acceptance, and she would hold him, touch him, reciprocate, the thought of killing him never left her. Now, with him gone from her life, those thoughts grew stronger still. “My grief will only cease once he is dead.”

Another squeeze and Ann sat back to study the stars for herself. “This was a beautiful place once. Only yesterday in fact. Somehow, it seems like a lifetime ago.”

“Your family, this house and land, who are you? And how have you managed to survive out here?”

“We arrived some three years ago, together with a hundred other families, making our way across the trail to Utah. We had an idea we could start again, rebuild the life denied us back east. A life free from ignorance and hate. We"re Mormons, Elisabeth. When we saw this place, it was as if the Lord Himself, Our Heavenly Father, were pointing His finger, saying to us to stay and settle. So we did. With the help of our friends, we built this house, bought stock from the Pilcher ranch, went into partnership with him. He is a good man, a Christian man. Kind, honest and true. He helped us in so many ways. In return we helped graze his cattle, and protect this outlying part of his land from the excesses of the savages, many of whom we have tamed and brought to the true way of the Lord. We have lived in peace with them ever since.”

“And the other grave?” Elisabeth nodded her head towards the area of high ground where they"d laid the old man and the maid.

“Our mother, Mary. The pestilence took her less than a year after we settled. For months, all Joseph would do was sit and stare. No words could console him, despite all our best efforts. Then, one morning, he stood and announced his recovery. He took to repainting the entire house with such vigor, it was as if he were a young man once more. The Lord blesses us in so many ways, Elisabeth.” Ann smiled and in the darkness, her teeth glowed white. “We have spoken, my husband Job and I, and we are of the same desire – we wish you to join us, Elisabeth, be part of our family.”

For a moment, Elisabeth could not find her breath. She sat, unable to speak, Ann"s words bringing shock, surprise, even bewilderment. From being out on the open range, suffering weeks of hardship, brutality and fear, to this. Peace. An opportunity to rediscover something of what she once had. She did not know what to say, or even how to say it.

“Take your time. Think about our offer, Elisabeth. Do not rush to a decision now. But it is clear you have not lived well, that your heart is hard, your soul besmirched by hate, but with us, deliverance will be yours. So sleep, and in the morning when you awake and the sunlight brings with it all the hope and happiness of knowing you are home, give us your answer. It is our sincere wish for you to live with us, to share our love for one another and for Our Heavenly Father.”

“I know nothing about you or your faith.”

“You do not need to. We accept you for who you are and will never ask anything of you. All we desire is your love and acceptance.”

“You have those things already.”

She smiled. “We want you to be safe, Elisabeth, to put behind you all the dreadful things you have experienced.”

“I want for nothing less.”

“Then consider our offer, Elisabeth, and stay. Become one of our family.”

“No.” She did not react to Ann"s sharp intake of breath, but set her eyes across the plain. “I can"t do that, Ann. I"m not ready. Not even if I sleep and consider it for a hundred years.” She leaned across and squeezed Ann"s hand. “But I will work as your maid.”

“Elisabeth, we would never ask you to—”

“I know. You do not have to say it. I believe you. But, I cannot change who I am, not until that scoundrel lies dead in the ground. So, towards that end, I"ll stay here and help you in as many ways as I can.” She gave a short laugh as she remembered their evening meal. “I tasted that man"s soup. It was disgusting.”

“Ah, Peter? Yes, yes, I have to say…” She took up giggling, rocking forward, hand over her mouth, “Forgive me, but yes!”

“I"m a good cook. Father always used to say I"d missed my vocation, that I should head up a fancy restaurant.” Elisabeth smiled, shaking her head, images of her father looming up inside her head. She dabbed at her eye with the kerchief. “That man, the one who made the soup, who is he?”

“Peter is our farmhand. He tends to the cattle; the few sheep we have. He feeds the animals, takes them to the market when Mr. Pilcher calls for them, helps with bringing in supplies, repairs fences, all types of different things. He"s a rock and we would sorely miss him if he were not here.”

“Is he … Is he not one of you?”

“Of our faith?” Ann shook her head. “No. Neither was Suzanna, our maid. But they are blessed, as you are, Elisabeth. I can see it, otherwise I would not have invited you to stay. The rest of our family feel the same, and Peter too. So think on it, Elisabeth, please. Our wish for you to stay and be part of us is sincere.”

Elisabeth smiled and sat back in her chair, gazing into the distance. She had no doubt Ann was truthful, generous and good. Perhaps, living here with these people would allow her time to rediscover herself and, just possibly, give her a base where she could stay and wait for Father to return. “I don"t need to think on it, Ann. I"ve made my decision. If you will have me as your cook and maid, I will accept your generous offer.”

Ann gave a tiny scream of joy and threw her arms around Elisabeth. She held her with such love, such passion, that Elisabeth broke down and cried.