Chasing Rebels

Chapter 5

Boxes filled our small living room. They were mostly just picture frames Frank insisted on keeping to have a reminder of something he thought was worth remembering.

We moved just three days ago so the house was an unkempt mess. Neither of us really bothered to unpack. It gets tiring after the third move. Most days, we expected to up and leave within a month so unpacking wasn't a priority of ours.

Dumping my bag on the counter top in the kitchen, Mal greets me with a nod. He almost looked relieved to see me. "How's surviving the first day?"

Ecstatic that I manage to get out of there alive. Except, there was one particular brown eyed boy I can't seem to forget. If Beck was less on the asshat side, I would have swooned at how easy on the eyes his was. But, alas, nobody was that perfect.

"Harsh. God, it was worse than the last."

"Any good come out of it at least?" he asked as he popped a peanut butter jar open.

I smile proudly. "I made a friend."

He looked up surprised. "Oh?"

I can't exactly call Shay my friend since all she did was the bare minimum of what a decent human being should act. But still, I was grateful enough for doing what others didn't have the courage to do and that was stand in between me and Tyler. I've since then learned that Tyler Kregg wasn't just a bully at school. He was a full blown menace whose name no one dared to utter.

Just by that alone, I'm not sure if Shay was fearless or just plain stupid for standing up for a stranger.

"Yeah. Her name's Shay. Helped me out with a couple of things."

Mal placed the butter knife down, his attention solely on me now. "What couple of things?" he asked with a twinge of worry on his tone.

Shit. I can't exactly tell him that Shay kept my injury a secret. If Mal knew I had become sloppy, he isn't going to let it slide. And I doubt telling on Beck Asher was a good idea. I should be laying low, keeping my head down. But this school was different than the others. It was like a shark tank with malign attitude instead of jaws.

I used to not get picked on at school because they were afraid of Mal, but now that he's not by my side anymore, I was fair game. I had to defend myself somehow. But Mal won't take that into account.

"Directions, mostly," the lie rolls off my tongue with ease.

Mal snorts. "And that constitutes to being a friend? You're more gullible than I thought."

I throw him a look. "Don't be mean."

"I'm not. I'm just saying being friendly is different than being a friend."

But that doesn't mean she could be. How great would that be?

Mal furrowed his brows and I sit up straight. "What happened to your flannel?"

I froze. I didn't think he'd notice I was wearing Shay's sweater. "What?"

"Lift up your shirt."

I roll my eyes. "Dude, if you're a p*****t then just say that."

Luckily, he lets it go. "Ass."

"Degenerate." I hop on the counter and snatched a sandwich from his plate. "So, listen. I have an idea I know you can't refuse." He frowns from the robbery but doesn't say anything. "There's this guy at school who's an even bigger ass than you. We still have some paint left, right? Or at least kept the cannisters."

Mal's gaze avoided mine.

"Where did you leave the paint cans? The school's going to freak the f**k out. I'll even take a video for you."

"Listen, about that—"

"I already have his locker combination. Of course, it was a b***h to follow him like a fuckin' groupie lurking in the shadows. But the lengths we have to go through to gain satisfaction, right?"

I get off the counter and make for the stairs. The paint cans must still be in his room.

"Vie, wait." He darts a hand out in my direction.

But I quickly move away before he could catch me. "Come on, it'll be fun."

This time when I jog up the stairs he doesn't stop me.

So we both run up to his room, him chasing me. When I arrive, his belongings were all still packed inside boxes. Scanning the whole room, it looked like he never  even started unpacking at all.

I laugh. "Uh, aren't you too old to need help unpacking?" I joke, but Mal didn't find it funny.

He kept his head down low not meeting my eyes. Something's definitely wrong.

"Mal, why haven't you unpacked, yet?"

Ice cold chill went down my spine and I'm tempted to bolt to the front door so I wouldn't have to hear it coming directly from his lips.

"I was supposed to tell you before but I didn't know how." His tone sounded dejected.

My heart starts pounding. "Mal, better cut to the fuckin' chase."

"I got accepted at Brown University."

My heart leapt. A huge smile plastered itself on my face. I was overjoyed at his accomplishment. But the feeling of dread still hasn't disappeared so, I furrow my eyebrows. "That's thousands of miles away. I'm sorry you had to decline."

When he doesn't say anything, I follow up, "You declined, right?" He doesn't respond. Suddenly, the world felt so small. "Mal? Tell me you declined."

"I'm sorry, Vie. It's already taken care of. Arrangements have been made."

Arrangements have been made?

This really was happening. Mal was leaving.

No, Mal was leaving me.

"Have you forgotten—"

"Of course not."

"And you want to run around traipsing Rhode Island?" I asked, exasperated. You'd think Mal should know better.

"It's not your decision to make," he expressed quietly. I haven't seem him lack confidence before. Mal always seemed bigger than the room itself.

"The hell it's not! This involves us. You can't just leave."

He meets my eyes. "I never wanted to, okay? But Brown has been a dream of mine for so long, Vie. You can't ask me to give it up." I would have made a joke about how the only thing he was capable of dreaming was himself on a Hawaii beach surrounded by Wahine belly dancers but I don't think now's the time. "This had been eating me up inside for months."

I pull back. "Wait, you've been planning this all along?"

"I didn't want it to turn out like this."

"How long?"

"Since your sophomore year."

I close my eyes. He's been planning on applying to Brown all this time and never bothered to tell me?

Mal shook his head. "I didn't even think I'd get in."

"But you hoped for it otherwise you wouldn't have sent out an application." I swipe a hand through my hair. "When are you leaving?"

He takes a long pause and I look back inside his room. I bite the inside of my cheek. "Today," I assumed. Though, he doesn't correct me. "When were you planning on telling me? Or did you just think of upping and left?"

"Tell me how I could have told you without you reacting like this?"

"Sure as hell not the very day you leave."

"What do you want me to do, Vie, besides stay because I can't do that."

I would have hurled a glass vase at him if I knew this house wasn't just rented. "Why is it so easy for you to just leave?" I almost shout.

"Because it's not my fault we're in this mess in the first place!"

I blink. That sure as hell shut me up. Mal never pointed fingers even in the most dreary and hard days. I guess he desperately wanted Brown University.

I look away from him. "Okay. I guess that's pretty clear now."

"I didn't—" he stops himself. Somehow, I appreciate it. The last thing I wanted from him was to lie. "Just—grow up, Vie. Sometimes we have to make the hard decisions in life."

"It's not exactly easy growing up, in case you haven't noticed."

He nods. "But we had to."

Sadly, that was the truth. "But we had to," I agreed.

Then I realized, I was being selfish. Selfish for wanting him to stay and give up his dreams. I wasn't focusing on the bigger picture and that sent guilt travelling down my gut.

"Might be late, but . . . I'm happy for you."

"You don't seem like it."

I smile sadly. "Well, no s**t. Try having something blow up in your face like a s**t grenade." He laughed, which surprised me. "I truly am, Mal. I mean, wow. That's Brown University. That's like, Ivy League. How'd you manage that?"

I don't doubt Mal could get into a prestigious school by himself. He's smart when he actually makes an effort. I just wanted to focus on the side of his delinquent side so it wouldn't hurt to see him eventually having a life of his own without me because God knows I'm the only one holding him back.

"Believe it or not, I didn't cheat." He regards me solemnly. "Are you going to be okay?"

You. Not you and Dad.

I gave him a hug. "Be safe, please. Try not to forget us while you're there," I say jokingly to ease the spiking tension of the room but it came out seemingly bitter than what I intended.

"Vie, don't be lik—,"

"I—uh, forgot something at school. I better get it before the doors close. I figure you don't need any help with carrying your boxes to the car, yeah?" I was already out my brother's door before he could give a response.

I can't say him choosing to leave didn't hurt. I knew something as big as this would happen eventually. Mal couldn't always just stay by my side and protect me.

My feet have no clue where to go as they carried me out of the house. I couldn't will myself to look him in the eye without breaking.

Mal was the reason I could tolerate every move. Every change in lifestyle. What would I do now that he's not here?

My feet stop as soon as I get to an intersection.

There was one thing I could do to get my mind off this. And that involved Tyler Kregg.