Curveball [BL] COMPLETED

16

Coach rubs at the stubble on his jaw. "Are you sure?"

"Positive." Juda nods.

Coach continues rubbing at his stubble, eyes scanning Juda's face. He's looking for something, a flicker of doubt possibly etched into Juda's face. There's not. "If you were anyone else, I'd tell you to think about it more. But you're not." Juda nods. "You understand offers like this are rare, right?"

Juda does, so he nods again. He's been doing that a lot. Nodding. "I do."

Coach tips his chin toward his office window, showing the entire baseball field where everyone else is practicing. "Does this have anything to do with the others?"

"You mean Nico and Carmen." It's not a question. "Yeah, a little. I probably would've taken the offer if it weren't for them. But I like playing baseball, it doesn't matter where. The Royals aren't the best team, and I can't picture myself in Kansas."

"They aren't the best team," Coach agrees. "But they're a Major team. You can eventually get traded into another team. And with your skill and a little experience on the Majors, you're gonna have a good chance having a say in which team."

Juda's ready to decline again, but Coach continues. "They have a training camp coming up." Juda pauses despite himself. "Two weeks out in Kansas. Other college and high school players just like you. Drafts aren't until July, I'm sure they won't pick anyone for the position for another few months." Coach gives him a heavy stare. "Just check it out. If you're sure you don't want it after that, I'll leave it be."

Juda doesn't need two weeks in Kansas to know he doesn't want the catcher position. Or it's not that he doesn't want it, but he values something more than the Majors right now. But it wouldn't hurt to see, would it? Two weeks isn't long. He'll be in and out of there, knowing with certainty that he made the right decision.

There's been doubt lingering in the back of his mind. Doubt he refuses to acknowledge. What if the Majors would be good for him? What if he really never gets an offer like this again? He could solidify his professional career within months.

"Two weeks," Coach repeats.

"What about our games? I can't just miss two weeks."

"You're not my only catcher, Juda. Vinny is on the first string for a reason."

"But Nico-"

"Nico? What does Nico have to do with this?" Juda grows quietly, instantly regretting his words. "Nico doesn't need you in order to play a good game, just like you don't need him. You're a hell of a battery, but baseball is an individual game just as much as it is a team one." Juda knows. He didn't mean to imply Nico needs him, but unease still settles in his chest. "You don't trust him by himself?"

"Of course I do. We just.. haven't played apart in a while."

"Maybe these two weeks will be good for you, then."

"Just two weeks in Kansas? No other conditions?" Juda asks.

"No other conditions," Coach confirms.

Juda leaves his office five minutes later, the weight of his answer left behind.

⚾️

Jax stares at Juda long and hard, cigarette trapped between his fingers as he blows out smoke in the other direction. Juda appreciates the small attempt to lessen the smell, but to a non-smoker like him, it's still strong. "So you went to California," he starts lowly, "went to the beach, went to the Angels stadium, an amusement park, and didn't f*****g invite me? You're a piece of s**t and I hope you rot in Hell."

Juda rolls his eyes with a smirk. "Should I have invited you to the after party too? There was a dress code." It was more the lack of clothes necessary to get into their trio.

"I didn't even know you were gone."

"You're an ass. I was gone for three days."

"And yet," Jax shrugs, "I had no idea. Know what pisses me off more, though? You went and got yourself shacked up without telling me. Have I not been your wingman this entire time? I'm incredibly hurt, Juda."

Juda's foot quietly scrapes against the sidewalk outside Jax's room. He didn't even mean to stop by, but he saw Jax taking a smoke break and jumped at the opportunity to prolong going back to his room.

"What's up with you?" Jax asks, eyes flicking to him. "You usually avoid me when I smoke."

"I needed to rub in how much fun my California trip was."

"You're so f*****g funny." His eyes roll. "Now seriously. What's up? Is this about what Coach wanted before you left? What did he even want?" Jax fakes a gasp, "Did he kick you off the team? I've been telling him for years-"

Juda wonders again why they're friends.

Then again, Juda doesn't have many friends. And because of this, he quietly spills about the contract, the training camp, and his answer to all of it. Jax quickly grows serious, eyebrows raised in surprise by the time Juda finishes.

"A contact for the Majors? What the f**k, Juda? That's a huge deal." Jax taps his cigarette and Juda watches ashes slowly fall to the ground. "And you said no? Have you lost your mind?"

"Maybe." Juda huffs out a quiet laugh. "I know it's a big deal, but I'd rather stay here and finish these last two years."

Jax looks doubtful, "You're not gonna regret it? I mean, it's the Majors. There's no guarantee you'll be able to join right after college. You'll probably have to start on a Minor team."

Jax is probably right, but Juda still nods. "I know. I would've taken the contract if it wasn't for," his hand waves around and Jax nods in understanding, "them. But it's different now, I guess. We're dating~"

"You can date and still go to The Royals."

"Long distance?" Juda shakes his head. "It wouldn't work out with all our schedules."

Jax blows out another puff of smoke, slowly. "I don't know, man. You're gonna put a three day old relationship over a career you've been working toward all your life?" His wording ticks Juda off a bit, because Carmen and Nico aren't just a three day old relationship, and Jax should know this. "What about this training camp? You won't even check it out?"

"I thought about it, but still told Coach no at the end. There's no point checking it out if I'm just going to say no anyways."

"There's so many reasons why you should go, Juda. You don't wanna take the contract? That's fine, wait the two years until you graduate and see what happens. But you have a chance now to play with MLB players with no strings attached and you're not gonna take it?"

Of course Juda's imagined himself in the Majors. What baseball player hasn't?

Juda's thought about the training camp, too. He's thought about it much more than he's letting on, but he's secretly afraid if he heads down to Kansas and gets even the smallest glimpse at MLB, then he'll change his mind.

He tells Jax exactly this, explaining if he sees the difference between college and MLB, he'll compare them over and over until he's forced to acknowledge which one is better. Deep down, he knows it won't be college baseball.

Jax listens quietly. He listens as Juda rambles on, more than he means to, and he listens as Juda sighs and admits he doesn't actually know if he's making the right choice. "What do you think?" Juda eventually asks. "Is it dumb not to take the contract?"

"Honestly, yeah." Jax stubs out his cigarette and tosses it in the trash. "But I don't have a Nico and Carmen that would make me want to stay."

It's the most unhelpful thing he's ever said.

"Talk to them." Jax shrugs. "See what they think about it."

Juda has a vague idea what they think. They made it clear enough in California that he should think about it more. Part of him wishes they told him not to go. It would make the doubt he's feeling nearly invisible.

Juda nods his thanks while Jax looks ready to head back inside, but Jax's eyes flick to the side when there's a gentle scrape of someone's shoes. "Just on time~" Jax calls. "I was about to send him to bed. Take him off my hands, will you?"

Carmen laughs softly, promising he will. His smile looks a little forced as he holds an energy drink between his hands. It's unopened.

Jax opens his door and only gets a step in before he's throwing in one last dig. "Don't be too loud, alright? Juda thinks you're real pretty and you're in the honeymoon phase, I get it, I do. But other people live here-"

"Goodnight," Juda cuts off. Jax snickers as he closes the door.

Carmen bites at his lip, hiding a small smile. "So, you think I'm pretty, huh?"

Juda glances at him, suddenly bashful. "I mean.." His hand waves around, giving Carmen a small once over. "It's obvious. Isn't it?"

Carmen gives a little shrug and tips his head toward the field. "Can we talk?"

Talk, Juda's chest immediately tightens. He wracks his brain for something he could've done, anything that could've possibly pissed Carmen off. He doesn't look mad, so Juda isn't sure what he's feeling. "Sure," Juda agrees, following him out to the field. "Is Nico still showering?"

"He's in bed," Carmen answers, and it only makes Juda more nervous that Carmen's clearly avoiding having their talk in front of Nico.

They're far from the dorms but not quite at the field when Carmen's eyes flick to him. "I heard you talking to Jax," he admits quietly. "I didn't mean to listen, I was just looking for you."

Juda's chest tightens again. It's a weird feeling. One he's not used to feeling. "What did you hear?"

"Probably not everything, but enough." He stares at Juda, eyes curious. "Why didn't you tell me about the training camp, too? You found out this morning and haven't mentioned it at all."

"I didn't think there was a reason to," Juda says. "I already told Coach no."

"I heard you talking to Jax, Juda." Carmen frowns. "You told him you don't know if you're making the right decision. You said you were only staying because of us.." From his tone, Juda can only assume Carmen doesn't like this.

But Juda doesn't understand why. He's staying. He's gonna stay and make their dreams into reality, so why does Carmen seem upset with him? "Maybe I don't know for sure," Juda confesses, "but I'm serious about you guys, California, all of it. Going to the Majors would mess all of that up."

"Basing your future off a promise we made is stupid." Carmen tells him, frown still on his face. "Do you know how that sounds? Giving up the Majors for a relationship we just got into?"

There it is again. That annoyance pricking at Juda's mind. The other two years of friendship meant nothing? It suddenly disappears and is replaced with three days of dating? "We promised all of that before our relationship, Car."

"It doesn't matter when we promised it." Carmen sounds exasperated. "You'd take the contact if it weren't for me and Nico, right? You said it yourself-"

"Why does that matter? Who cares why I took it or why I didn't? It's the same answer either way-"

"I care," Carmen cuts him off. "Do you think that's supposed to make me feel good? I should be happy my boyfriend's throwing his dreams away for my sake?"

Juda's annoyance pricks again. "It's not for your sake, Carmen. I already told you in California, I like playing baseball. Whether it's in college or in the Majors, it doesn't matter." It's not entirely the truth, Juda knows.

"You really believe that? Seriously? It didn't sound like that when you were talking with Jax."

"Why were you listening anyways?" Juda suddenly asks. It's apparently the wrong thing to say, Juda can tell right away he should've kept the question to himself.

Carmen stares at him dully.

"Here." Carmen holds out his hand, offering Juda the drink.

Juda stares at it. "What's this?"

"It's for you," Carmen keeps giving him that unimpressed look.

"..Why are you suddenly giving me this?"

"Well, I don't know, Juda. Lets think and wonder why I was looking for you." Carmen shakes the drink, still insisting for him to take it. "I already told you I didn't mean to listen."

Juda doesn't take the drink, but he's sure as hell regretting ever asking that question. "Look- I don't really get why you're mad at me," he admits. "I thought.. isn't this what you guys wanted? All of us graduating together then going to the Majors?"

Carmen's hand drops to his side, still gripping the drink. "What do you want? You're not-" He struggles for the right words, "You're not supposed to base a decision that big on other people. So what do you want? You wanna graduate together and wait another two years to go the Majors? Maybe even more?"

Juda's quiet.

Carmen stares at him.

Carmen stares and stares and waits for Juda to agree. Juda's supposed to agree and remind Carmen that they're gonna graduate together, just like in their plan. They're gonna graduate, then they're heading straight for the Majors. No matter how long it takes, just like they promised.

But he doesn't.

"I don't know," Juda finally admits. His voice is quiet, troubled.

"Well," Carmen says, but his voice cuts off there.

They stand silently, a gentle breeze rustling by.

Carmen eventually turns to the side, no longer looking at Juda. "I'm gonna go inside."

Juda stares at him. "Okay."

"Just.." Carmen holds the drink tighter, "Just do what you want. Not me and not Nico. You probably.. meant well, basing your decision on us, but it makes me feel shitty. Like I'm tying you down here."

"That's not-"

"I know."

Juda watches him, wishing Carmen would turn around so they could finish talking. But they're done, aren't they? What's left to say? Juda doesn't know what he wants, and Carmen's said what he needs.

"I'm gonna.." Carmen gestures to the dorms, and he's walking away the next second, leaving Juda in a swarm of his own thoughts.