This will be deleted soon - The Wrong Hope *Complete and Free*

15. Coffee

Sally-Anne

Year: 1983, Summer

It had been a long day. Wait night? Ok, no, scratch that, long 32 years. I mean I don’t sleep right? So it’s just one endless stretch of time. I felt exhausted especially after the time I had spent with Guy. I couldn’t blame him for the way he was with me, after all I am a monster, but that didn’t stop it all from making me feel drained. Mostly I wanted to just put it all behind me, Guy was just doing his best to make the world a safer place and in a short while making the world a better place would include killing me. When we left in the car I tried to switch off and get some kind of rest but it didn’t really help. Instead it was like I had blinked and opened my eyes in a new place: time seemed to work strangely and it didn’t make sense. Some moments lasted an age and other times hours flew by.

Right now I was stood in the middle of a diner watching Guy walk away from me and trying to stop myself from panicking. The place looked like it would have been a really neat hangout when it was new but now it looked mostly tired and sad; which was pretty much how I felt. Booths with ribbed red seats and rectangular metal edged tables were in a line across the long window looking out over the parking lot, but the red was faded and ripped in some places. The floor was black and white chequers, the pattern was repeated in smaller squares on a waist height strip around the room going across the front of the counter. Tall barstools were all along the front of the counter, they matched the tables and booths with their red tops and metal edges but again they were faded and torn. The menu above the counter looked like it had seen better days too, one of the panels was cracked and the pictures of food had lost their lustre becoming light damaged and orangey. Jo stayed at the counter watching Guy walk away, as soon as he was no longer visible she turned to me.

“Is your name really Sally-Anne?” Jo asked in a hushed voice. I nodded, I didn’t have a lot of air left to speak with and didn’t really want to have to breathe again. I was too scared that I might want to kill Jo and I couldn’t believe Guy had left me alone!

“Are you in trouble Sally-Anne?” She asked with urgency. I shook my head. It was and wasn’t a lie. I was in trouble, my whole life was trouble at this point but I wasn’t in the kind of trouble that I thought she was implying, at least none that I wasn’t begging for. Sure I was being taken across the State by a man that I was going to give my apparent inheritance to and then let murder me but that was more of a ‘life choice’ than ‘trouble’.

“You don’t look so hot Hun, are you sure you don’t want me to call for some help?” Jo said slowly and pointedly. I had thought the back and forth between her and Guy had sorted everything out but clearly Jo had other ideas. I was going to have to do something and quickly or everything was going to get messy. The voice in the back of my mind whispered I could kill her, that it would be easy, that her hot fresh blood on my tongue would be divine. I was horrified that I'd even had the thought. While I stood there having this existential crisis Jo started to turn away from me and walk toward the phone. I had to do something and fast. Something that didn’t involve her dying, but dying was the answer; just not her, me.

“Cancer,” I croaked “I have cancer.”

Jo stopped just shy of the phone, her fingers outstretched. Relief coursed through me that was until she turned, shoes squeaking and looked at me with large brown emotion filled eyes. Jo lifted the countertop and quickstepped over to me, arms outstretched. Oh no, no, no, no! This was bad. I looked down. Don’t breathe, don’t breathe I repeated to myself. My lips trembled as I pressed them together.

“Oh Hun, don’t cry!” Jo wrapped her arms around me, I could feel the heat of her body and hear her heart thumping steadily, the voice in my head whispered viciously for her blood, a violent demanding rasp. “Come on and sit down.” She ushered me to the stools at the counter, rubbing my back soothingly. Jo was being so kind, I had to keep it together, I couldn’t lose control – I knew what happened when I lost control; the memory of my mother’s eyes wide and fearful filling with shadows as the life slipped from her burned white hot. Jo pulled some napkins from the holder and pushed them in front of me with a supportive squeeze of my shoulder, playing the part I picked one up and dabbed at my dry eyes.

“Let me fix that coffee for ya Hun.” Jo squeezed my shoulder one last time before scurrying back behind the counter, shoes squeaking as she went. I felt somewhat safer with the counter top between us, the physical barrier easier to trust than myself control. Jo poured a large to-go cup of steaming black coffee for me from the pot before putting the creased bills Guy had left on the counter in the register and running the order to the kitchen.

Now I was alone I wondered if I could risk a breath. I didn’t know how much her scent would linger but surely I could manage it? Guy must trust me or he wouldn’t have left me alone right. Right? AND I had taken in the scent of the diner earlier when he asked me if anything ‘smells good’. Mostly it had smelt like rot and hot fat with just a few bright notes, Guy, Jo and coffee. I hadn’t liked coffee when I was human but the smell was familiar, in fact it smelt better than I remembered which gave me an idea. I popped the lid off and lent over the cup taking a deep breath. The deep aromatic aroma was warm and comforting blocking out the tantalising flavours that emanated from Guy and Jo. I wrapped my hands around the cup and brought it to my lips for a cautious sip. Rich and delectable with a heat that made me moan appreciatively, the coffee surprised me with its palatability. It was the first hot thing I had consumed since... I shut it out. The thought, whilst it wrenched at my heart painfully, stirred a desire that made it difficult to stay in my seat sipping slowly at the liquid that suddenly felt too thin on my tongue.

“Need a refill Hun?” I jumped at the sound of her voice. I'd been so wrapped up in my own thoughts and revelling in the heat of the coffee seeping through my body I hadn’t noticed her return.

“Please.” I said quietly, pushing the empty cup towards her. I couldn’t remember finishing it. I glanced across the diner, Guy wasn’t back yet, an errant thought was worming its way through my mind. What if he wasn’t coming back? What if he had abandoned me like, like Ricky? I gulped.

“So where you heading this time of night?” Jo pried pouring the refill, steam looping and dancing in the air.

“Specialist appointment out of State.” I replied thinking on my feet. Jo gave me a concerned look.

“And you have to travel overnight? Your Dad should have planned it better. You need rest in your condition, not being dragged across State in the dead of night.” She shook her head disapprovingly.

“The specialist had a cancelation, so it's last minute and he’s not my Dad.” I said adding to the lie, but for some reason I couldn’t stomach her thinking Guy was my Dad. “Legal Guardian, my parents are dead.” I took a big mouthful of coffee, letting it sit in my mouth for a moment before swallowing. Whilst comforting it did nothing to soothe the thirst.

“Oh Hun, sorry to hear that.” Her voice laden with emotion Jo put her hand on mine for a moment before reaching over and running it across my shaved head. “Does it bother you Hun? Ya miss your hair?”

Honestly I hadn’t really thought about it till now. It had been inconsequential; I didn’t even know if it would grow back – not that there would be time for that. I hoped that by this time tomorrow I would be gone.

“A little.” I said honestly.

“Well I hope you don’t mind me taking liberties but I thought it might so I got you this from the back.” Jo held up a deep blue Paisley print bandana. Without waiting for me to reply she hurried round the counter once again, stopping behind me to tie the bandana so it covered my head. “There you go!”

“Looks good on you Sally-Anne.” Guy called from the other end of the diner. I gave him a weak smile before thanking Jo.

“No need to thank me Hun.” She ran a hand over my cheek before walking back behind the counter, out of the corner of my eye I saw Guy stiffen slightly. So he didn’t completely trust me. Why had he left me alone then with this completely breakable, kind woman?

“Order up in 15.” She said to Guy with a glance at the clock, before pouring him a large black coffee. Guy sat down reaching for the coffee and sliding the restroom key towards Jo.

“Remind me Guy, what time is the cancer specialist appointment? It came through so last minute I can’t remember.” I tried to be casual while filling him in on the lies I'd told. He gave me an approving smile.

“Don’t worry Sally-Anne, we will be there in plenty of time.” He said before mouthing ‘good job’. Jo was busy washing out the coffee pot and setting up a fresh filter.

I sat quietly drinking my coffee while Jo busied herself at the counter putting more napkins in the holder, cleaning the counter, wiping down the condiment bottles and such while casually questioning Guy about my condition and treatment plan. He answered back knowledgeably and with a positivity that gave Jo hope that I would recover.

When the food was ready Jo brought Guy’s out on a plate and put a to-go box in front of me.

“Seems as you got the time, I thought it would be nicer for you than eating in the car and I got the cook to make you a little something for the road just encase.” She said to Guy and me with a smile. I, for one, was very grateful. The smell of the food was pungent and repulsive; in the car it would be inescapable even with the windows open.

“Alright then, ‘ppreciate the thoughtfulness.” Guy said begrudgingly before tucking into his meal. I nursed my third refill as Jo continued to make herself busy; the whole time trying desperately not to think about how thirsty I actually was.