This will be deleted soon - The Wrong Hope *Complete and Free*

23. Feelings

Guy

Year: 1983 1st of August almost 3am Monday, Summer.

Shit. I cursed inwardly. This was just great, absolutely f*****g great. I’d tried to get her to calm down but quickly realised that wasn’t going to happen any time soon. Since we hit the driveway Sally-Anne had started spiralling into full panic, presumably because entering her family home was imminent and to be honest I didn’t blame her. Against my usual nature I felt oddly sympathetic.

Refreshed from a decent night's sleep at the motel, which was a shocker in itself, I'd found myself feeling more patient with my current travel companion. I hated to f*****g admit it but over the last 4 and a bit hours she had kinda grown on me. She was caring, curious and reasonably stubborn. As the miles had passed I found it harder and harder to hold on to the image of the blood sucking b***h that I knew she was and was getting tangled up in the sweet, interesting persona that was Sally-Anne. She still appeared surprisingly human, I would have thought that after 32 years holed up she would have been off her f*****g rocker but it appeared Doll was astoundingly sane.

Pretty astute too, I couldn’t believe that she had even thought to ask about the whole cancer thing. Christ I hadn’t even thought that she was f*****g listening in the pissing diner the way she cradled the coffee but apparently my little Doll was pretty good at paying attention. Really got me in the feels too.

I was starting to regret not taking her to the graveyard – it might have calmed her down, given her some peace so I could have some f*****g peace and quiet now. My reasoning for not going was honest enough, not that I knew if the place was gated or not, but also, I just couldn’t deal. I mean Jesus f*****g Christ it was too human of a thing to want to go and pay your respects and after our little heart to heart about dear old Dad I just couldn’t get that connected to her. My little Doll was going to have to die. Sure she had been good for now but she would lose connection to her humanity, she was an abomination and I would have to kill her; so as she had sobbed I had ignored her – telling myself I didn’t care and hardening my resolve. Ain’t no way I was shedding any tears over this Vamp b***h.

As I pulled up the house she started begging; the words broken with sobs and spilling out clumsily. It just royally f*****g pissed me off. Honest to f*****g God the crying, the begging I couldn’t bloody well stand it.

I stopped the car, throwing it in park. She was sobbing real hard now.

“Sally-Anne.” I said sharply but she didn’t acknowledge me “Sally-Anne f*****g pack it in or I swear to God I’ll drag you through the f*****g house and ...” f**k it, b***h wasn’t listening. I got out of the car, leaving the lights on, door wide open, and without hesitating marched around to the passenger side.

This was her fault, she knew I couldn’t stand the crying and she was f*****g doing it anyway just to piss me off. I wrenched the door open and grabbed her roughly around the arms. With more force than necessary I yanked Sally-Anne out of the car and threw her to the floor.

Her protests started anew and rage swirled in me. Why was she making me do this?

“Nooo!” The word came out filled with desolation and fear. “Kill me now, end it, you don’t know what I did, I can’t face it, I just can’t, please, it’s too much, I’m sorry, I’m ...” Her pathetic pleas tore at my heart and I hated it, I hated her, I couldn’t let her do this to me. It was all her fault for being so s**t, s**t at being a Brice and s**t at being a Vampire.

I already had my Grandfather's hunting knife in my hand. I wasn’t sure when I had retrieved it from the ankle holster. I felt consumed with rage and as I brought the knife down, it took everything to slam it through her hand and keep it there.

“Finally! Got your attention now, huh?” I looked into her beautiful green eyes, wild and wide. This could so easily get out of hand, I forced myself to focus on what I wanted. I wanted the vault. I wanted to own it. I kept the knife pressed down with my weight, if I moved it now I wouldn’t stop, I could almost see how her features would twist in surprise and pain if I drove it right into her chest.

“You are going to stop this right now. You are going to get up and go in the house with me because,” I took a deep breath before continuing, trying to keep my rage from overflowing, “I know what you did Sally-Anne and if you don’t do this then they would have all died for nothing. For nothing Sally-Anne. Don’t kid yourself into thinking all your suffering is a worthy atonement for what you have done. If you don’t do this, if you don’t give me the vault, then all the people out there that I’m not going to be able to help, their blood will be on your hands. Giving me the vault is the closest to redemption you will ever be.” My resolve to get what I wanted, how I wanted it, hardened with each word - sure I could kill her right now, the wards would cease. I was here, first on the scene and could fill up my car and be on my way but this was my golden opportunity and Holy Mother of God - I was going to win.

She whimpered and I knew she would obey but I wasn’t done, I wasn’t satisfied, I needed to dominate. I wrapped my hand around the back of her head, the knot of the bandanna hard on my palm, jerking her closer. It was cruel but she shouldn’t have upset me, she deserved it. The words tasted like acid as I whispered them right in her ear “And when I say ‘I know what you did’ I mean I know what you did. I’ve seen the police report, Sally-Anne . Peter? Was that his name? Beyond cruel, big sisters are meant to take care of their little brothers.” There had been photos in there too, black and white. I thought about taking her upstairs and showing her the crib. After 32 years it was still intact, but she was shaking under my hand and my anger was mostly spent.

“Get up!” I commanded, dragging her upright. It wasn’t difficult but my little Doll wasn’t being helpful either. I took the cuffs out of my jacket pocket, I hadn’t wanted to resort to this but Doll wasn’t playing the game. Still a tad pissed I closed the cuff a little tighter than necessary around her right wrist before fastening the other end around my left one.

I didn’t look at her as I pulled the knife out with one quick motion. If I looked I'd be swept up in the sadness of those green eyes and sure as s**t I wasn’t going to feel guilty when she was the one that had been acting up.

I did what I had to do.

She didn’t make a sound when I removed the knife, or when I pulled her over to the car, or when I wiped the dirty metal across the front of her shirt or even when I used my thumb to reopen the wound so I could pour water through it. It pleased me that she was submitting. I wasn’t sure why I felt the need to wash out her hand as it would heal well enough on its own, but I did, which in its own way annoyed the f**k out of me, little b***h was making me care.

I took a mouthful for myself before chucking the almost empty canteen in the back of the car.

Doll followed me round the car like a good Vamp as I sorted out the open doors and running engine. When it was sorted I pulled the flash light from the duffel bag that I'd grabbed when I got the canteen out. My plan was to fill it with the most valuable items once I had secured the vault and leave the rest for another time. I was probably going to have to see about buying the house and the land. The f*****g flash light didn’t come on when I flicked the switch so I gave it a hard slap shifting the batteries and it came to life.

A morsel of excitement fluttered in my gut as I looked at the house, only a few days prior I’d been here kicking up dirt, chatting to locals and not expecting to find much – especially considering the stream of self righteous Hunters that had come looking to claim the Brice legacy over the last 30 years but now it was all going to be MINE. Keeping the light to my feet I used the cuffs that connected us to get her attention. Doll looked blankly at me, emotionless and eerily still, she wasn’t breathing or blinking; I gave her a look. She better f*****g behave.

Leisurely I headed up to the front porch letting my intuition guide me. It might be only a few hours till sunrise but I felt like I had all the time in the world.