43
1630 Words
14th November
Mathew opened the door Autumn slipped in sitting down he closed the door walking
over sitting opposite her. “My apologies for the other day Autumn. I was un-professional and it won’t happen again.”
“That’s fine.”
“Cool, so.. shall we begin?”
“Yeah.”
“So tell me, Autumn, did your friends always play pranks on you?”
“Sometimes. They thought it was funny, but we didn’t.”
’“Sounds to me like they made your life hell.”
“Sometimes, most of the time it was good.”
“Like when?”
“When we were alone. I think Rudgey thought that I was invading their territory so I had to go.”
“Didn’t you get on?”
“I tired for Caz, they were always together. We spent weekends with their friends so none of us thought I was keeping him away from his friends.”
“Sounds to me like he was an overprotective parent not a friend.”
“It often felt that way.”
“So they were jealous.”
“I guess.”
“Were they close?”
“They’d always been friends. I guess he thought I’d take him away.”
“Is that why you thought that you were to blame?”
“I guess, even though he was with Caz he thought Taylor should find someone who wasn’t me.”
“You can’t blame yourself Autumn this guy sounds like he wanted everything his way or not at all. He didn’t think anyone but him could be happy.”
“I guess.”
“We’re you ever happy?”
“Sometimes.”
“And the other times?”
“Alone.”
“You should’ve got out.”
“I tried. He said he loved me and he wasn’t going to loose me.”
“So he killed himself?”
She looked at him the question took her back it was so unlike him, so abrupt. “What?!”
He placed his hands on hers. “Seems a simple enough explanation to me Autumn. He wanted you and he felt that you were pushing him away so he thought it was the only way he could cope with you trying to call it a day by topping himself.”
“And my friends can you explain that?”
“His friends were foolish or just grieving the loss of their friend so they’d thought they’d take the easy way out to to join him. Your friends well they say love is blind.”
“And I thought you understood.”
“I do. I’m just trying to put it into perspective. For example one leads the rest follow, and they all fall.”
She pulled herself up storming walking across the room slamming the door behind her.
“Hey Autumn.”
“Not now Con.”
“But...”
“Just leave me the f**k alone Con!” She snappe angrily, storming away.
She sat on the grass smoking, she was so angry he was supposed to be helping her through it all. Had he got out of the wrong side of bed this morning?
She doubted her cigarette out taking the scissors out of her bag, edging it toward her wrist.
He grabbed her hand. “Don’t Autumn. It’s not the way.”
She looked at Connor, her eyes glazed. “Why not? I shouldn’t be here.”
He took the scissors off her putting them back into her bag zipping it up, sitting next to her.
“So are we calm now?”
“I hate this place, and I hate him.”
“You talking about Harding?”
“He bagged all of them down. All of my friends and he didn’t give a shit.”
“They have to come down hard on us every now and again Autumn to knock some sense into us. It is up to us if we accept it or not.”
She looked at him with tears in her eyes.
He placed his arms around her. “It will get better.”
“When Con? You always say it will, but when?’
“When you start believing that it will and start believing that you’re not to blame.”
She pulled away.
“I thought you said it was water proof?”
“It is.”
He placed his thumbs under her eyes wiping them. “Don’t get angry at him Autumn he’s just doing his job.”
“Did you ever get mad at Grayson?”
“I still do babe. I just short circuit and flip, he’s used to it. He knows how to calm me down, Harding is just learning and he’s got along way to go to earn your respect.”
She looked at him.
“We’ll get you through this Autumn if you let us in.’
“I’m trying.”
“There’s no rush okay.” He pressed his lips on hers, kissing her. He moved away. “Come on lets get to lesson.”
They pulled themselves up walking away from the fields back into the high school for their lessons.
They met at break and lunch her eyes still looked so angry would her last two lessons be any different.
Daniel sat next to Autumn, her eyes still glazed. “You okay Red?”
“I’m fine.” She snapped.
“Chill Red, it’s me not Harding.”
“I know I’m sorry. It’s just a bad day.”
“Why what did he say to you?”
“Slagged my friends off.”
“Oh.”
“Right class, get your books out.”
They all pulled their books out beginning the lesson. Autumns’ eyes were still glazed as the bell rang.
Autumn and Daniel left the room Daniel trying to keep up with her though she was still hobbling she was quick.
“Gee Red, slow down.”
“I just want to get out of here.”
“We will. Just slow down your ankle.”
“f**k my ankle.”
He grabbed her she stared through him. “Slow down and take it easy. What’s wrong with you?”
“I’ve had a bad day.”
’“Don’t take any notice of him red he probably aint had any.”
“With his attitude I ain’t surprised.”
“Ignore himfers, they were your friends not his. You knew them he didn’t. What right does he have to criticise?”
“None.”
“Exactly. Come on Con will be waiting.”
“I’m here.” He said placing his arm around her kissing her. “I called you I guess you didn’t hear me.”
“Sorry Con, Red was on speed dial.”
“It’s cool, come on let’s go.”
They all walked out of school heading home.
They stood at the end of the bridge
“I’ll meet you here tomorrow.”
“Okay.”
“Later Red.”
“Later Dan.”
“Night babe.”
“Night Con.”
They walked away Autumn sat near the lake lighting a cigarette.
“You okay Autumn? My brother can be such a d**k sometimes.”
She looked up, his dark hair short, his eyes glistened in the afternoon sun. “Sam.”
“So are you okay after Friday?’
“Yeah thanks.”
“I’m sorry about Taylor. I have no idea what he was thinking.”
“I don’t think he does sometimes.”
“You’re too good for him Autumn. You deserve better.”
“Maybe.”
“He needs to get rid of his friends if he wants to ever be happy with you. But, I guess we both know that’s never going to happen.”
“I guess.’
“How are you Autumn?” He asked, his dreads falling over his face.
“Gaz.”
“Well, are you okay?”
“I’m fine.”
“You looked like you were a million miles away.”
“Can’t say I noticed.”
He sat besides her. “So how’s the ankle holding up?”
“It’s swollen, again.”
“What have you been doing?”
“Nought.”
“You need to rest it, babe.”
“I know. I’ve just had a bad day.”
“I know babe. I hated school too.”
“Why are you here?”
“Apart from checking on you. I came to apologise for the other day. I got a little carried away.”
“You’re a guy I should’ve expected no less.’
“I called you to apologise and you’d gone.”
“Mom called me for supper.”
“So, are we okay?”
“I guess.”
“Good. I like you Autumn. I’d like to spend more time with you.’
“I don’t know, Gaz.’”
“Friday here.”
“You don’t give up do you?”
“Nope.’
“Don’t you work Friday’s?”
“I do, all weekend. I do the dead mans shift at the cemetery.”
She swallowed.
“You can join me. I’ll walk you home.”
“I don’t know.”
“Please Autumn, just give me a chance one’s all I’m asking for.”
“Fine.”
He smiled. He leaned forward kissing her cheek. “I’ll pick you up here okay same time.”
“Sure.”
“Later Autumn.”
“Yeah later, Gaz.”
He pulled himself up. “Rest that ankle.k
“I will.’
“Night, Autumn.”
“Gaz.”
He smiled walking away what had she just got herself into? She lit a cigarette watching the sun go down. She pulled herself up walking away.
- Writer
