Howl With Me

My life wasn't perfect like his or hers instead my life was completely different, it was never perfect. Everything started when I was born, everything ended when I was born. Unexpectedly mom died while giving birth to me, to this day the doctors neevr figured out why she died because everything was normal. She was healthy and so was I until I grew older. Dad A person who is supposed to love you. A person who is supposed to catch you when you fall. A person who is every kids role model. A person that teaches you what good and bad. A person who will protect you. But life wasnt that simple for me, from all his heart he hated me, he despised my soul. Instead of protecting me he hurt me, he was destined to be my dad. I still couldn't change the fact I love him more than anyone else He never taught me anything expect for one thing I learned past 16 years of my life 'You are useless and one will ever love you'. ~•~ 12 years old Anna POV: I felt really weak because the drug I injected few hours begin to wear off, I really needed another one. I pressed my palm over my head and gently laid down next to the river. The cold wind drifted right across, the sand which sadly landed on my face. I wiped it off and looked up at the sky, today night was quite cold compared to the past week. For the first time I felt my self shivering in my clothes, I wouldn't call them clothes. It was just a long white ragged drees I loved to wear when I harm myself, I never cleaned it or even washed my blood away. I somehow just loved wearing this, it reminded me of my mom how she left me alone in my messed up life. I turned around and laid on my stomach, curiously I looked at the water flowing around. I dipped my hand inside and moved it up and down the cold water. I wasn't wasting my time in the forest I was waiting for the bells to ring, they only ring once in a day just a second after midnight. Till then I had prohibited myself to even touch the blade I have placed over the rock. I let out a small whimper because it was getting really cold, the snow was falling down. The water was freezing and so was I but I had to complete my mission or else mom won't ever forgive me for not harming my self. It is always cold out here in lanercost, this town is pretty big and out of civilisation. I have been born and raised here my entire life so I know everything about this place. From the creepiest alleys and to the abandoned schools I went everywhere but I seem to only fit in the forest. The forest is quite large, it covers most of the town up. In the night no one comes here because some people have sighted lions, wolves, bears and a lot of other wild animals. I am not scared of anything expect my father, I don't want to lose him like my mother. My eyes widen as I got up from the ground, a loud 'ting' pierced through my ears as another second passed the echoes begin to whisper around the forest. Plastering a huge smile on my face I ran towards the rock I had kept my stuff which also includes my mother's memento which was a lovely diamond necklace. I placed that at the corner as I laid by the stone, I grabbed the blade and looked at my reflection but I couldn't see anything because it was to dark and I was sitting in the middle of the forest. I was withdrawn from my thoughts when I felt a drop of rain right above my nose, I creased my eyes brows together and puffed out a sigh. It can't rain, I havent even started. I pull my sleeves up, just a inch below my elbow. I stare at the marks I have created, they look beautiful also they were arranged correctly but one looked out of place because it was when dad smashed the beer bottle in my hand. I placed the blade above my hand, I looked around my arm to see if there were any empty spaces where I could cut because these marks heal in my month, I have started cutting my self when I was eight I don't have a single mark from that day because they heal. Which I totally hate, I don't like when they vanish away that's why I started doing deep marks. A tear slip down my cold cheeks as I cut my arm, I made two cut before pulling the razor and drawing a long line in between of all the cuts. I don't want them to be organised anymore. After 30 cuts I was satisfied, I threw the blade in the river. One day if I ever go down I will see thousands of blades but I don't really care. I lay down on the rock while staring at my hand. It was red and smeared with my blood. A satisfying smiled appear in my lips. I closed my eyes and waited for the sleep to invade me. 2 HOURS LATER I felt him, his fingers caressing my dried skin. I nodded as he continued to caress my face, with my eyes closed I couldn't see anything but I was enjoying every second of it. This was way much better than drugs or cutting. Confusingly I opened my eyed to see my new addiction but I was dragged back to my senses. I gasped as I looked into his sparking green eyes, a muscular man kneeling right front of me. I opened my mouth to scream but he immediately place his cold hand over my mouth. His hand was way much colder than the snow. I bought my hands up to move his hand away but he tightly caught my both arms. Now I got really panicked out so I begin to cry, his looked down my arms to see all the blood. I tried to pull away but his hands were to strong, more stronger than dads. "Stop struggling, I am not going to hurt you." He said as he kneeled down my face, I closed my eyes tightly as tears slipped down my cheeks. What is going to do? He looks much stronger than dad. "Don't cry, I will move my hand but you promise me not to scream." He whispered as he wiped my tears away, I nodded as I looked at him. I have to go home before dad know that I am gone, he will be back in a hour and if I don't go home he is going to do something. As his hands moved away from my face and arms I immediately got up pushing him back, I wiped my tears away and looked at my bloody arms. Before he could even be up I was running out of the woods, he yelled few words but I kept running. I knew he was behind me so I begin to run faster. My foot begin to start bleeding from the roots beneath, I ran until I saw a road. I looked back to see a shadow running I immediately knew that he was following me, surprisingly I jumped in the middle of the road. They were a lot of car passing by and I literally could feel my heart stopping especially because of the blood, I looked forward to see a station. It look like a gas station, I looked back to see nothing. No sign, but I know he is going to follow me so I ran to the gas station and walked to the ladies washroom. I closed the door behind and puffed in a deep sigh, turning around I saw myself in the mirror. I looked like a witch, with blood smudge all around my face and with he white dead clothing. I actually did look like one. I pulled the water tap up and washed all my blood away, I dried it off with some tissue papers and ran out of the washroom. I ran behind the gas station and into the forest once again, I had to reach home before dad knows I am gone. I run at my fastest speed but I know I am still slow because I am to weak, I stop in front of my house. A grin spreads across my face as I looked around to see all the lights of, with the help of a rope I go up back to my room. I run to my bed and laid down, I snuggle up with the heart cushion before drifting away into a deep sleep. Till the next morning I didn't knew I had lost my mother's last memento and I never knew that dad would leave this town forever, I just wished I could get the chain back but now it was to late. ~•~