Split

Chapter 4-1

Chapter 4

But night after night I read on, diving deeper and deeper into my memories. Nathan was still overseas and I had nothing better to do, so sitting all alone in our new condo, I flipped through the pages of my past, revisiting that wonderful, but confusing time of my life…

Dear Bump,

Dad is leaving for two months.

On account of a job in the Hudson Bay. I’m going to be responsible for the garbage and snow shoveling. Some of the cleaning, too, but mostly the scrubbing of the toilet bowl. Aunt Frannie is coming to stay with us until Christmas. Dad is leaving on a train, and he’s leaving on Tuesday. He said, “Take care of your ma and don’t let Aunt Frannie drink too much.”

I’ve never been on a train, but I’ve been on the subway a lot, so that counts for something.

Next week is Halloween. I’m going as a pirate. Boone is going as a mass murderer. He and Nick have been working on some sort of graveyard set. They plan on “having little kids s**t their E.T. costumes.” When I was there yesterday, they were trying out a home recipe for fake blood and human tissue. Mrs. Lund warned, “If one of you ends up blind because of this revolting mixture, don’t expect me to drive you around for the rest of your life.” But she stuck around the kitchen anyway. I think she was fascinated by the result.

I didn’t know this, but Nick is really good at arts and crafts. I tried not to watch him, but that’s like trying to keep my eyes on a book when the TV is on.

I noticed everything Nick picks up always looks so much more interesting in his fingers. He made a mask out of papier maché and used flour and water to create scar tissue. The mask is in the shape of a human face, except it has no mouth, just two slits for the eyes, and a pair of small holes for the nose. When Nick slipped it on, he looked terrifying. Then he tried on Johan’s old work clothes and walked around the house for an hour without saying a word. He’d stumble across the room and Helga would scream, swearing that whatever he broke, she’d take out of his savings. I played my worst game of chess ever. Every time I caught a glimpse of him out of the corner of my eye, I squirmed in my seat. I think Nick grew two inches since August. He must be close to six feet five now. His voice is just as deep as Johan’s. His shoulders are wider than the fridge. He’s colossal, and yet, there’s something delicate and refined about him.

It was his seventeenth birthday on August eight. Johan gave him a car. It doesn’t work, but they’re going to fix it up together. Nick knows a lot about cars and mechanical things.

I hope Mom and I don’t encounter problems, you know, on account of us living without Dad. I don’t know if Mom knows how to change a fuse. Dad showed me where he keeps his shotgun. It isn’t loaded, so it doesn’t matter that I don’t know how to use it. “Just to scare ‘em,” he said. “Aim and scream.”

Mom’s hair is growing back, but she’s still real skinny. I don’t like it when she hugs me because I can feel her bones on my stomach.

Aunt Frannie said, “I’m going to show you how to cook. If your mom knows you made it, she’ll have to eat it.”

I don’t mind learning how to cook. I just don’t want anyone knowing about it. If JF or his friends find out that I’m spending Sunday morning baking cookies, even Boone won’t be able to stop them from torturing me. They’ve started calling me a homo, and yes Bump, I know what a homo is.

Well, I’m pretty sure I know what it is.

Jesse Chao quit the math club. Can you believe him? “I kissed a girl on her privates,” he said.

But it’s a lie of course. Boone and JF cornered him during recess and demanded to know what it looked like. Jesse said it had a pair of lips and five small holes. Boone gave Jesse a wedgie, while JF slapped his ears pink.

Boone got detention again, but JF got off with a warning. No fair.