Safe Place to Fall

20

I could barely sleep a wink, I stayed up till almost 1AM unpacking and repacking my bag. Over and over again, I emptied it and refolded everything. Checked I had all the new underwear I bought and made sure about a thousand times I had Grayson’s gift. I began to overthink and started to freak myself out, what if he doesn't understand what I’m trying to say? 

I feel lightheaded and dizzy at the same time. I sit down on the edge of my bed. I text Hanna, hoping she will be awake. 

‘Meltdown over trip. You awake?’ 

‘What’s wrong?’ 

‘I’m nervous…’ 

‘Why, you guys are already doing everything.. Now you just have more privacy right?’ 

‘We haven’t… gone all the way.. We’ve barely done anything besides heavy petting..’ 

My phone starts to ring. 

“Hanna?” I whisper in the dark. 

“You're seriously telling me you’ve been dating this man for six months and you haven’t done anything with him??” 

“We’ve only officially been together for a few months Han.. you know that” 

“Okayyy.. But still… nothing?” 

“We have been taking things slow. Even Grayson said he’s not ready to go all the way” 

“Yeah right.. I bet he’s just waiting for his moment to pounce on you. Waiting for you to be helpless and defenseless and then take what he wants” 

“Han… why would you say that?” I feel sick by her words. She is never so harsh, I don’t understand what is going on. 

“Nevermind.. Just enjoy your trip. Stop overthinking it O… I gotta go” She hangs up the phone before I can say anything else. I put my phone on to charge and lay back on my bed. I close my eyes and finally drift off after what feels like hours. 

I wake up in a panic to my alarm blaring at me from across the room. I get up and turn it off, looking around. I gave myself plenty of time to have a nice long shower. I grab my clothing I preselected for the trip and head to the bathroom. I step into the shower and wash my hair, lathering my body in my vanilla body wash. I brush my teeth and get dressed slowly. I look at myself in the mirror, seeing how far I’ve come from a sickly bruised looking girl to a young woman. I’d go as far to say that I’m pretty. Even with my hair in a short pixie cut, my face is youthful and fresh looking. My pale creamy skin, smooth and soft. My breasts have really filled out, as well as my hips. It makes me feel a bit heavy but it doesn’t look bad. I think it’s because I was so skinny for so long, seeing meat on my bones now is still an adjustment. 

A gentle knock comes to the door. 

“Theo?” Emily calls out, “Grayson is here to pick you up” 

“I’ll be right out!” I say as I quickly pull my shirt on. I check my watch and see I spent way more time than I had thought showering. I open the door to see Grayson walking down the hall to my bedroom. I race forward to get ahead of him. I place my hands on my door frame to block him from coming in. 

“STOP!” I cry out. He raises his eyebrows at me questionably. 

“Oh?” He smiles, he is amused, crossing his arms over his chest. 

“Stay...right here” I order as I step backwards into the room and quickly zip my bag closed, after throwing my toothbrush and hairbrush in it. I push it onto the floor as I turn back to him, “Okay.. now you can come in” I say as I extend my hand out to him. He hurls forward and sweeps me off my feet, power slamming me onto my bed. He is gentle but I still scream out, in surprise. 

“What are you hiding from me?” He kisses my neck as he hovers on top of me. 

“Nothing” I giggle as I push him off of me. He sits beside me and pulls me into his lap. 

“Morning beautiful” He kisses me on the lips. I blush as he pulls away. 

“Morning Gray” I kiss the tip of his nose. He crawls off of me and sits at the foot of the bed. 

“Is that all your stuff?” He nods to my duffel bag 

“Yep. I’m all set!” I nod at him. He leans down and hooks his arm through the bag, lifting it up.

“Light packer, don’t girls normally pack for a week, even if it’s only three days?” He teases me. 

I shrug and grab my sweater and scarf. We say goodbye to Emily before heading to the truck.  

“You sure you got everything? It’s a long drive” He says as he opens the door for me. 

“I think I do.. I can’t think of anything I may be missing” 

A few minutes later we are exiting town, on the highway. I feel my eyes start to droop, my lack of sleep catching up to me now. I rest my head on the seat and close my eyes. The heat from the vents feels nice. 

I can hear Grayson gently singing along to the radio, I open my eyes, yawning. 

“Hey sleepy head” He reaches his hand over, giving my thigh a small squeeze before returning it to the steering wheel. 

“Are we almost there?” I look out the window, all you can see is snow, everywhere white snow covers the land. 

“You’ve only been out for an hour.. We still have about 4 to go” 

“Holy, where are we going?” 

“I’m not telling you.. Just relax.. Go back to sleep. I’ll wake you when we get there” 

I feel like I should stay awake, it’s such a long drive. I want to be good company to him, he must be tired too. I straighten myself up and turn the radio up. 

“Not tired anymore?” 

I shake my head and smile at him, bopping my head to the song. We continue on like this for a while before I have to go to the bathroom. 

“Gray?” 

“What’s up babe?” 

“I have to pee” 

“I think there’s a gas station coming up.. Fifteen minutes?” 

“Okay” 

As promised there is a gas station coming up on the right side. I jump out of the truck and run inside, asking for the key to the washrooms. 

“Bathrooms are for customers only.” The attendant snaps at me, pointing to a sign. 

I run back to the truck, 

“That was fast,” Grayson comments.

“He won’t let me use the bathroom unless I buy something,” I say as I grab my purse. 

“Really? Well I’ll come in and get us some coffee then” He turns the truck off and gets out, he takes my hand as we walk inside. 

“Bathroom key please and thank you” He smiles at the attendant. 

“Bathrooms are for customers only, like I told her.” He looks at me pointedly. 

“We will buy something after you give her the key” Grayson raises his voice slightly, making the attendant flinch back slightly. He quickly reaches under his desk and grabs the key, tossing it to the counter in front of him. Grayson snatches it up and hands it to me. 

“That wasn’t so hard, was it?” Grayson asks him. He doesn’t answer, just glares at Grayson from afar. 

The bathroom is filthy, I quickly squat down and do my business, careful not to touch the toilet. I wash my hands and use a paper towel to turn the tap off and open the door. Grayson hands me a large hot cup of tea as he takes the key from me and goes into the bathroom himself. I see a display full of muffins and grab a cranberry orange one. Grayson comes back to me shaking his head. 

“That is a nasty bathroom” He tosses the key back onto the counter and pays for our drinks and my muffin. He holds my hand once more as we leave the gas station. Once in the truck we get settled in and get back onto the road.  

After what feels like six hours later we are finally pulling into a small town. Grayson takes a side road immediately and begins driving down a long dirt road, a small cabin at the end. 

“My dad bought this for my mom when they first got married. It was her favorite place to go for Christmas, I haven’t been here since she died” He says as he parks. 

“Wait here while I go inside to make sure there are no squatters, okay?” He gets out and grabs a baseball bat from behind the seat. I gulp down a wad of saliva now wedged in the back of my throat. Squatters? It doesn’t seem like the kind of place homeless people would be. I watch him as he walks slowly to the cabin, unlocking the door. His large stature disappearing inside. 

I look around the area, seeing no other houses anywhere near us. We are isolated, what do we do if something happens? 

I check my phone to see if I have a signal, of course there is none. I take a deep breath, trusting Grayson will keep us safe. A few minutes later Grayson comes out of the house, the baseball bat slung over his shoulder. He looks so sexy walking over to the truck. He opens my door, my stomach flips as he holds his hand out for me to take. I place my own hand in his and let him slide me out of the truck. I land in his arms. 

We walk back into the cabin, Grayson has grabbed a few bags from the back. 

“I’ll get the fire started and get some heat in here, then we can head into town for some food. By the time we get back it should be warm in here.. Sounds good?” 

“That sounds perfect, can I help you at all?” I place the bag I was carrying down and look around the small cabin. It is very homey, I love it. I wish I had grown up spending time in a place like this. 

“If you want you can unload the cooler into the fridge?”  He nods to the large cooler he had brought it, nodding towards the kitchen. I nod and go to pick it up, it’s too heavy for me to lift so I start to drag it towards the kitchen. Grayson comes up behind me and lifts it  onto the counter for me. 

“Sorry, I didn’t think about the weight” 

I start putting the food into the fridge while he builds a fire. I sit in a chair and watch Grayson work, the way he cuts the kindling and stacks it tells me he has done this hundreds of times. He works with precision and within minutes there is a fire crackling, generating heat. 

“Ready?” He stands, facing me, wiping his hands on his jeans. I just nod as I stare at him. He has a bit of soot on his cheek, I reach up and wipe it away. His hands find their way to my hips, pulling me close against him. Our breath lingers in the air as we linger our hands on each other’s bodies. Grayson’s fingers squeeze into my hips slightly as his breathing becomes staggered. I lean my head against his chest and listen to his heart beating rapidly. 

His stomach growls loudly, making me pull my head back and chuckle. 

“How about that breakfast?” I ask. I go to step away from Grayson but he leans down and pulls my face up to his. Our lips connect and excitement explodes inside me, inside my stomach a knot tightens. I shiver against his touch and his hands hold my face in place, he pulls back mistaking it for me being cold. He takes my hand and leads me out of the cabin. 

It’s a short drive to a small café, in the heart of town.