Being Me
By a route obscure and lonely,
Haunted by ill angels only,
Where an Eidolon, named NIGHT,
On a black throne reigns upright,
I have wandered home but newly
From this ultimate dim Thule. ~Dream-Land
Edgar Allan Poe ~
-----
In the depths of the water, her body floated. Her n*****s hardened in the cold air, her mind in a familiar haze. The warmth that surrounded her brought a tantalizing sensation to her lower half, the heat burrowed between her legs. The rocky bath beads lay undissolved scraping her rear end. Josey’s eyes were closed to the world.
She pushed her hand into the crevice of her thighs, wiggled her fingers in her slit. She silently moaned in the darkness. She had never known love nor a man’s touch. She yearned for it. The water slouched and splashed around her as she sought gratification.
Over the past couple of months, she found herself touching herself more often. When she wasn’t embroiled in an hellish nightmare, she dreamt of caressing a man’s body, having his length in her hands or her mouth. She didn’t understand her fascination because Nethersigh didn’t allow students to read about s*x, it wasn’t even shown on television. They were expected to figure it all out once they were married.
Her body started to tremble as she climaxed, then reality kicked in,
“When did I get here? How long have I been in this tub?”She pondered. At that moment, she came to the stark realization that she had lost track of time and space. Her eyes shook back and forth under their lids.
The deep lustful tingling she felt became faint like a distant memory. A failed attempt to open her eyes only increased her anxieties. The subtle smell of copper surrounded her. Fear encased her.
“Am I breathing?” She thought to herself.
She opened her mouth to scream but no sound came out. Her mind was scrambling to find a solution to the madness. The light jazz music that was once playing in her bedroom had risen several decibels.
All she could do was flail around in the tub in a state of panic. Unable to grip the sides, her body slid around in the solution.
“Open your eyes,damn it!” She screamed within, attempting to free herself from her mental prison.
When they finally opened, she saw the tub was filled with a thick red solution. Her erratic movements had pushed the goo onto the bathroom floor. The music in her bedroom changed once more, becoming louder and faster, causing her heart beat to speed up. The lights above the mirrors beamed, as if the sun was powering them.
“Somebody help me!” She mouthed her scream, her voice lost to the realm that fortified her. All she could do was strain in a feeble effort to reach the light. Her fingers dimmed, while the brilliance of the light increased.
“Wake up! Wake up Josey!” Her mother called to her while her dad stroked her hair. Josey’s eyes opened onto the real world. Her nightmare was finally over.
“What’s going on? What happened?” She spat out in a confused manner. The terror she felt from her dream still lingered on her heart. Her lips trembled. She could not help but cry out in frustration.
Holding her tighter. They rocked back and forth as her mother’s tears soaked her gown.
She took deep breath, choking back her terror.
“You were screaming so loud." her voice trembled.
They held each other for what felt like hours, waiting for the fear to pass, only to be shaken once more by the violent ringing of her alarm.
Her dad took several deep breaths, closing his eyes on the moment.
"Honey, are you well enough for school? I can make you another appointment with Dr. Keller?"He asked with a worried look on his face, slowly opening his eyes back up.
"I'm okay. I promise." Josey sought to reassure them and herself.
After her parents gave her one more hug for the road, they left her room. Their concern was plastered vividly all over their faces.
She had been having nightmares that could challenge any horror movie, for the past 2 weeks. Doctor Keller insisted that it was stress.
‘College life can be more stressful when you enter it at a very young age’ He had said at their last meeting.
Josey was a 20 year old university student. She was already working on her PHd in interdimensional analytics. The thought of Doctor Keller’s statement made her shrug her shoulders.
After she pinched herself multiple times.She pushed herself out of bed and commenced raiding her closet. She didn’t put much effort or thought into her outfits because she was very aware of her physical differences. Most of her bottoms had to be handmade.
Nethersigh was a place filled with slim, pale people. The sun shone only through the clouds. Whilst she was dark tan and boasted a beautiful set of purple and green eyes. Her black hair stood tall, if it was left untamed. The curls were large and when straightened, touched the back of her knees.
Her father would always say that their ancestral kingdom was small and filled with people like him and her. Their hair was considered sacred and should never be cut or touched by others. His words always left her wondering, “Then why are we here?”
She quickly threw on a t-shirt, mid length skirt and flats. She took a good look in the mirror and pulled her hair back into a big ponytail.
“My shirt is a little snug but I look pretty good” She smiled and winked at herself in the mirror. She then applied lip gloss to her thick lips.
“I may be different but I love who I am.” She said in an attempt to hype herself up for the day.
Nethersigh was a wealthy province in the country of Lichter . The buildings extended high into the clouds like high tech mountains. Most of the residents had drivers.There was an abnormal amount of hatred for the people of Sambofah. Josey and her father were descendants of Sambofah. The island kingdom was filled with beautiful jewels. The land basically sprouted currency. But since they were a proud people, they considered their land sacred and determined it should remain untouched by foreigners. In order to get there, outsiders would have to have ancestral rights. Therefore there was no trading, nor tourism. The people of Sambofah were also thought to be evil because of their genetic differences. Josey’s dad was only allowed to live in Nethersigh because of his research and subsequently his brain, per her mother.
Like most mornings, she lightly skipped to school, engulfed in her own thoughts. When she snapped out of her day dream, she was in front of the campus. Their family manor was only 5 blocks from the school.
"Josey! Wait for me!", Leon called out to her.
Leon was one of two people in the physical realm engineering department that interacted with her. She was not allowed to talk to him first, just in case the driver was still around. They tried their best to avoid drama. He didn't want to believe that people avoided her because of where she was from but it was quite apparent.
"Can I walk with you?"Leon asked with a toothy grin.
"Of course you can, my fellow nerd. Who am I to deny your access to bask in my-"
"Okay, let me stop you before you trip head first over your ego!" Leon bursted into laughter.
"You are hilarious, Josey!" he continued. His loud giggles and snorts, drew unwanted attention in their direction.
They walked to the classroom still enjoying their morning laugh. Their class only had two females out of twenty-seven students.Sheila, the other female, was the daughter of a Duke. She did not communicate with Josey. [Which is fine with me.]
"Leon! Josey!" Collin interrupted her thoughts to show them that he saved them some seats toward the front. Their seating was 'first come' seating but students rarely sat at the front. So Collin was just embarrassing in a good way. Collin and Leon were both small built with glasses that fit their astute faces.Their personalities were fun but they did not cut corners when it came to their education. It had been three years since they met. All of them were graduating in the third carrion.[**carrion is the start of the summer months]
Class time flew by. As soon as the bell rang, Leon, Collin and Josey hurried to the library. After classes let out, the chances of being pushed around increased. Consequently, they never congregated in the halls or eating areas. While making their mad dash, Josey turned to check on Collin's pace because he was starting to slow down. At that moment, she was knocked off her feet. The few books she was holding went flying into the air. As her rear end throbbed and stars flickered in her vision, she sat on the ground stunned. The students in the vicinity started to laugh at her.
“ Their lack of decorum angers me. “ She muttered to herself. Her friends were already picking up her stuff, so they could get back on track.
"Are you alright, my lady?" A sweet voice sung to her. Her focus guide by his voice, cleared by his sexy smile.
"Yeeesss." She sang. Her eyes were checking every corner, every curve of his body. This man had a brawny build but he wasn’t very tall. His hair was shaved down on both sides of his head, leaving long locs scattered in the middle. He had two piercings in his right ear.His pale skin bared darkness around brilliant yellow and orange eyes. Josey sat entranced. The vivid sounds of the wind blowing and birds chirping in the distance, made the moment feel unreal.
She wanted to see him naked. She wanted to feel his skin against hers. Everything about him made her think, "Mine."
Her heart beat increased, her palms began to sweat. She inhaled him and exhaled a feeling that was new and exciting.
"I am so sorry! I am in a rush though! Please accept my apology, love!" He yelled as he ran off towards the genetics building.
"I don't think I have ever seen him in this area before", Josey said under her breath.
****
“Dang it! I am going to be late! But who was that beautiful girl though.” Cofer mumbled to himself.
Before he could sit at his desk, the Director of Genetics called for him,
"Cofer, get in my office now!"
"I am coming!" He yelled back. As he gathered his research notes and ran into the office, he couldn't stop seeing a mental picture of her.
He quickly entered and took his seat next to Willingham. The director talked about upcoming events but he was unable to focus after bumping into someone he could only dream to be his future wife.
“I wondered where SHE is from. Not here obviously. Her exotic nature was unorthodox and would have been under scrutiny the moment she was born. NeSighers take pride in their lack of vibrant skin tones, which is fine but anything different must be reviewed, understood and documented. Even then, one may still meet those who can't see your beauty because they are blinded by ignorance. All I know is the current that surged down my spine, when I touched her hand, gave me life. Her eyes reminded me of lilyfillies that only grow in the mountains. The long purple leaf plant with a sparkling green stem had definitely met its match with her. I couldn't help notice the slight jiggle her supple breasts did, when she hit the ground. Oh Wow. That's in poor taste. I could've hurt her”,
Cofer bounced his pin between his fingers as his mental ramblings, disengaged him from the meeting.
"Dr. Cofer Kingston the III, please say hello to my new second chair", the director said. He was snapped out of his daydream by the wispy voice.
"He will be working in the office next to yours, please be courteous", the director requested then cleared his throat.
"This meeting is to make sure I do not scare off the new guy. Gotcha! ", Cofer scoffed.
"I'm not some crude vagabond." He stared intensely at the director.
"I understand Dr. Kingston. I just don't want a repeat of the previous misunderstanding", The director's voice seemed to plead with him this time.
"I will be more considerate", Cofer swiftly assured him.
When the meeting let out, there were only a few hours of low light left in the day.
He took a moment to put away his notes in his office then headed back to the door. "I should run over to the cafeteria before they close." He whispered to himself.