The World's Strongest Faker

Bathroom

What just happened?

Even Ernest was puzzled at what happened. His first kiss to a girl. Ernest doesn’t know how long it took to butt she separates her body quickly.

“...There? Do you now have an idea of how badly I need you?”

Blushing bashfully, Christine looks down.

“...But you’re my first. I’ve never done that with anyone else.”

Now he understands how badly she needs him in her guild. Is a princess kissing a commoner? It sure takes a lot. If one were to see them doing that, it will greatly affect her dignity as the royal princess of the nation.

Ernest touched his lips, “Hmm...I didn’t understand. Let’s do it again…”

Christine throws a slap but Ernest smoothly blocks it by grabbing her hand. He leaned closer, “I don’t know what you’re thinking, but I won’t shame you on doing that. I got something precious from you so thank you.”

Ernest said sincerely. Christine blinks in surprise and mutters “strange mongrel.”

“Did you just call me mongrel?”

“Forget about that...let’s return home. The air is getting chilly now.”

Ernest nodded in agreement, he walked towards the bench where Sophia was laid, her light breathing told Ernest that she was soundly sleeping.

He picked her up carefully as to not want to wake her up and returned home.

…

As soon as they returned home, Christine suddenly asked a weird question.

“Ernest, do you think I’m beautiful?”

Ernest, who was carrying Sophia, turned his head and faced her.

“Huh, where’s that coming from?”

Looking bashful, Ernest smiles and says, “Well to be honest, in my objective point of view. You’re beautiful, so beautiful that any man in this world would want you to become their woman.”

“I see...thank you for the response.”

“Anytime.”

…

Entering the house, Ernest hurriedly set Sophia down on her bed and raised the quilt to protect her from chilly air streaming through her open windows.

He closed the windows ajar, letting the night breeze stream through the bedroom.

With that matter solved, Ernest left Sophia’s room and prepared his bath. He filled the wooden tub with warm water and…

“Haaa…”

Ernest sank deeper into the bathtub after remembering Christine’s words.

“Am I beautiful?”

The answer is already obvious, why is she asking such a question? Anyways, he still doesn't trust the hooded man who appeared in the park earlier. How can he be so sure that he’s not telling anyone about his skill earlier? The galatine sword. If the palace were to know that, he’ll be in great trouble.

“Ahh...he could use it as a blackmail if I were to not join the Red Dragon.”

Just as Ernest muttered his thoughts, Christine―wearing a bikini―charged into a cramped bathroom.

“I-I’m coming in.”

What could this be? For some reason, Ernest felt he had made some great mistake, like thinking he just saw a whale in a pond. Ah, of course. It was strange for Christine to wear a swimsuit in the bathroom. Strange, and improper, and even impractical. A towel, even if it seemed embarrassing, made more sense―

"―No no no no no!"

Ernest almost flipped upside down at this suddenly nonsensical development.

"That's not the issue but it's weird by itself! First of all, why would you even

come in here!? I don't get the situation!"

"W-What!? You don't have to be that shocked, right?"

"I'm shocked anyway! Of course, I'd be! Seriously, what's going on!? Why

would you put on a bikini and enter the bathroom that I was already in!?"

"You… can't tell?"

"I can't guess at all!"

"That… I-I was thinking of washing Ernest's body…."

Dizziness struck him. His head was spinning. His body boiled. He must be

Hallucinating.

‘Christine wants to wash my body? Hahaha, yeah right. What romance novel did I fall into’

"Sorry Christine, it seems I'm not quite myself right now. I think I heard

something absurd. Could you repeat that?"

"I mean… that… you know? I'm your slave, right? Then washing my

master's body is my duty as a maid, yeah."

"Oh-ho, so that's all it was. Being a maid sure is tough."

…What!?

"N-No, w-wait a minute! I never asked for that!"

"I'd do it even without you asking! Aren’t the maid supposed to do that to their master? even though they didn't ask!? It's like that!"

"What are you even talking about!?"

"Anyhow! This is my duty as your slave! So hurry up and sit!"

"There's no way I can do that! There's no way I can have you do that! All this stuff about masters and slaves is definitely wrong! First you asking me if you’re beautiful, and now you want to wash my body? What the heck happened to a girl's sense of virtue!?"

"It's fine if I say it is! Just do as I tell you! If you don't―"

Christine paused for a moment, and a fire started to scatter from her hair.

"I'll boil you!"

*Rub rub rub*

Christine, princess of the Cryoliniese Kingdom, was currently wearing a swimsuit and kneeling before Ernest, washing his body that only had a towel around his hips.

W-What was going on…? Ernest’s head was about to go haywire. Or maybe it went bad a long while ago. If not, he wished it had.

"Be sure to keep your promise. I'll play along with this prank for today, but

I'll definitely not do so from tomorrow on."

"I-I get it already. I'm not going through with this because I want to, you

know. I lost, and became your slave, so that's why it has to happen."

…Why can't you just not do it?

But asking her would do no good, not after his last few requests. According to Christine, washing was supposed to be a slave's duty, so she wouldn't settle down without carrying it out at least once. Ernest didn't understand, but with her royal pride fired up, he couldn't easily argue her reasoning.

‘Anyway, just today. I'll bear with it just for today and then forget it all…!’

Ernest swore that to himself while Christine washed his body. However―

"…Uh."

His eyes were drawn to Ernest's bikini-clad body. Reason was telling him not to stare, but his instincts wouldn't listen. He pretended to look away, but his emotions forced him to peek.

Right now, he was looking at the flawless figure of this charming princess

he couldn't understand. Christine was far more exposed than when he saw her half-naked that day where her clothes got burnt from his skills, exposing the pale shadows of the collarbone at the

bottom of her long but thin neck, her tightly straightened shoulders, and her

hips that drew a sweet line to the edges of her long and tender white legs.

And among her striking features, the most outrageous was… her breasts.

White and massive breasts, colossal enough to bulge tightly from her bikini.

Fully ripe and peachy fruit that couldn't be hidden by her uniform. Bulges

that swayed left and right while squishing every time Christine moved her body even slightly. Seeing them, Ernest felt his brain empty of blood, and his throat burned with thirst.

This is… impossible to take….

There was no way he could turn away or shut his eyes. Ernest was more

temperate than most boys, maybe even too serious, but he was still a healthy seventeen-year-old lad. He wasn't adult enough to remove his attention from the bewitching body of a younger girl right in front of him. He couldn't help but stare furtively at every nook and cranny of her alluring, seductive limbs.

Thank goodness Christine hadn't noticed it.

…Still, Christine really is beautiful.

Of course, Christine was beautiful as a woman, but her body was also beautiful as a warrior. Ernest could see how Christine tormented herself to get that far. She had an unyielding will despite possessing so much talent. Her body could be a sculpture of her soul.

Really beautiful.

It was the first time Ernest realized her figure was this lovely. It was also the first time he wanted to touch it so badly. Of course, he knew that touching would be unforgivable, but―

At the same time, from Christine's perspective….

He's been staring so hard for a while now….

Christine had noticed Ernest's peeks long ago since a woman was sensitive to a man's eyes, especially those of a man on her mind. It was probably that thing called "a woman's intuition", a sense that men didn't have, and hers immediately felt Ernest's feverish gaze and told Christine, ``Oh no! He's looking! He's looking!

"…Uu…fu…uu.”

She was aware of that intense gaze, and her body started to heat up feverishly. His line of sight crept from her nape to her collarbone, breasts, navel, and thighs―as if he was brushing her whole body gently.

So embarrassing… I'm gonna faint….

But Christine didn't mind. No, she was relieved, because this was proof that Ernest didn't dislike her figure, or at least he wasn't indifferent to it. Seeing Ernest’s body had unsettled her, and seeing hers had sent Ernest's heart thumping the same way. Christine was reassured by this and was very happy.

"Then, next… your back. I'll wash it…."

Christine turned towards Ernest's back after finishing his torso. Of course, she wasn't going to wash his bottom half. It was still too soon for that. Right. Not just yet.

"Y-Yeah, I'll leave it to you."

Ernest took care not to mention Christine ignoring his waist. If the situation called for him to take off his towel, he was prepared to escape even if he had to smash through a wall.

Only the back left. It'll all be over after that….

As long as he didn't look at Christine's body, controlling himself was quite

simple. Having his back washed made him a little uneasy, but he didn't need to move his chest or abdomen. He could endure. He could pass this

mysterious ordeal. And then he'd forget it entirely, never recalling what

happened here today or speaking a word of it to anyone. May it lie buried and abandoned in the deepest corner of his memories.

As Ernest resolved himself, Christine suddenly spoke behind him, her voice as soft as a butterfly's wings beating.

"Hey, Ernest."

"What is it?"

"Um. You, see… erm, I mean, there's something… I'd like to… ask you…."

"Sure, that's fine. What is it?"

"Ernest… you… do you like… girls with breasts?

Ernest felt a hammer hitting the back of his head.

"Wha! Ah, you―! W-W-What are you…!"

"I mean… weren't you staring… a while ago?"

Waaaaaaah!

He'd been caught! She caught him stealing glances!

Ernest wanted to die. Disappear. Let him turn to wind this instant.

"I'm sorry! I knew it wasn't good to stare like that! But you have to understand―!"

"Y-You don't have to apologize. Just answer my question."

The question? He'd rather cast himself face-first onto the ground before her

than answer that. To be asked about his preferences by a girl right behind

him, what kind of crazy penalty game was this? Terrible, it was just too

terrible. Had he called down some god's wrath?

He was mortified, but―Ernest had no escape, so he resigned himself and

squeezed out a tiny reply.

"I… do."

"…Hmph."

S-Say something!

"H-Hey, Christine―"

Ernest nearly died from the silence, but the moment he spoke up―

*Squish!*

―two-round things, springier than a sponge and far softer than one's palms, pressed against his back. Numbness bolted up his spine and into his brain, short-circuiting Ernest's consciousness instantly.

Incomprehensible. Everything had happened behind him in his blind spot. No matter how excellent his vision, Ernest couldn't see somewhere he couldn't look. But even if he were fully blind, he'd still know what had happened.

"Ch-Christine… just now… you…!"

Before he could demand an explanation, Christine dashed from the bathroom with lightning speed, her face red to her ears.

"Why!?"

Ernest couldn't comprehend a single thing that had happened since waking up this day. But one thing he could say for sure: he'd never forget that sensation.