1 - Things Changed
After a long week at work I finished earlier than normal so I can head home and cook dinner for my fiance. It’s his 25th birthday today and its Friday so we can have a nice dinner to celebrate. As I stop of at the supermarket to grab the ingredients to make his favourite beef stir fry and pick up a few beers for him. I head home to start cooking.
Martin and I have been together a little over 4 years, he proposed after 2 and a half years but we have yet to set a date for the wedding. I try not to bring it up as it always ends in an argument. I can’t wait to be Mrs Alice Thomson, but the way things are going I’ll have to keep waiting.
As dinner is simmering on the cooker I head to get a quick shower and change my clothes, I change into a nice long flowy dress quite casual but pretty for tonight’s dinner. I had message Martin earlier to tell him to come straight home from work so we could celebrate, and he said he would be back by 6:30pm. It’s a little after 7pm and there’s still no sign off him.
As I sit and sip my wine waiting for him, then his mum calls my mobile asking to speak to him. After I tell her that he’s not here, yet she mentioned that they got cut off when she called his phone, thinking it was his battery that’s why she called mine. I begin to wonder where he is, so once I finish the call with his mum and I call his mobile and it’s turned off, going straight to voicemail.
It’s nearly 9pm and I’ve finished the bottle of wine already, feeling tipsy I decide I need to eat to soak up the alcohol, I quickly reheat the stir fry and plate it up and sit at the table alone to eat. It tastes good even if I do say so myself and I’m soon finished. Once I’ve cleaned up the dishes and put the remainder in the fridge I head to the lounge to watch some TV. I quickly check my social media to try take my mind of the fact Martin is still not home, I know he is a grown man, but I haven’t heard from him since he messaged earlier, I’m beginning to worry.
Something catches my eye on my f*******:, Martin has been tagged in a post at a nightclub in town by one of his friends, a video? Pressing play I hear them all sing happy birthday to him, several females hanging around him, work colleagues I presume. I’ve met most of them at previous functions. Martin is manager at the local bank and they are always hosting charity events. Well at least I know where he is, no point staying up for him, seeing as it’s late and I’ve got to work tomorrow morning. Heading to bed, I leave the hall light on so Martin can see when he comes in, I quickly change and climb into bed.
Wakening up with my alarm, I quickly switch it off not wanting to wake Martin up. I never heard or felt him coming into bed last night but as I stretch and turn over the bed is empty. Did he not come home last night? I quickly get out of bed going to check the house to see if he slept in the spare room but it’s empty. I head to the lounge to find him curled up on the sofa, suit jacket over the back of the chair and his tie hanging out its pocket. I take a closer look to see his face covered in lipstick several different shades of it. Clearly someone bad fun, I snap a picture to show him later. I try shake him awake, pissed off at the sight of him.
“Martin wake up" I whisper loudly. He groans and slaps my hands away from his chest.
“Martin get your ass up now" I yell right in his face
“Alice stop yelling. I only got home at 5am. Let me sleep" he whines as he turns over. Pissed off with him, I storm to the bathroom take a quick shower and change into my ripped skinny jeans with a top slipping on my gazelles, I then head through to the kitchen to see Martin hunched over the sink trying to drink water from the tap. A pathetic sight if I’ve ever saw one.
I walk past him shaking my head at the state he’s in. “you could of at least have washed the lipstick off your face before you came home Martin" I say disappointed as I sit with my bowl of cereal and iced tea at the breakfast bar behind him.
“s**t. You going to work?” he says as he knocks his knee on the cabinet, dragging his hand down his face.
“Yes, will be finished around lunch. I made dinner last night for you it’s in the fridge if you want it later.” I say as I grab my bag and storm out the house. “Alice" he shouts after me, but I slam the door behind me and head to my car.
On my way to work I think about how many times this has happened. He says he’ll be home at a time but never comes home and I wake to find him passed out somewhere in the house or wake up to a message saying he’s staying at Tom’s house, one of his bank colleagues. It’s been going on for a few months now, at least twice a month on a Friday night. I’ve never really questioned him about it, but it makes me question his commitment to our relationship. Things are changing between us and I’ve tried to talk to him to fix it, but he always makes excuses up and I don’t know how to fix it on my own.
I arrived at work earlier than planned and make a head start, keeping my mind busy and away from the subject of Martin. I’m a designer for a bridal shop and have been doing the job for 3 years since I finished my college course. The company I work for also do alterations of bridal and bridesmaids’ gowns and that’s what I’m working on today. I have a bridal party of 5 coming in at 9am to get fitted for alterations for the wedding in 2 weeks’ time. 1 bride and 4 bridesmaids arrive bang on time. Sophie and I, my colleague and college buddy quickly get the girls in their dresses, we all chat amongst ourselves and are done with pinning the dresses to fit perfectly.
Just after noon, the bridal party leave, and the store is now quiet. As we take a little break I check my phone and see a few missed calls from Martin, I quickly call him back.
“Hey baby, when will you be home?" Martin asks as he picks up my call on the second ring, which is very unusual for him.
“About an hour and half. Why?” I ask still pissed off with him.
“I’ll make lunch for us, then we can go out to the movies or something" he says as he moves around the kitchen.
“Lunch is fine. But I’ll not be going out, I’m not in the mood. I need to go, I’ll see you when I’m home" I quickly end the call not waiting for his response.
This happens every time he comes home late or drunk like last night, he knows I work most Saturday mornings so I don’t go out on the Friday night, and when I get home he’ll have made lunch or he will take me out for the day shopping then for dinner. It’s like he is making up for what he did the night before.
It never used to be like that, we would be out on Saturday nights with friends clubbing or having meals and drinks. Our s*x life used to be amazing, but now, well it’s been nearly 3 months since we had any s****l contact. We’ve kissed and made out but every time it gets heated he’ll stop and make up an excuse. I’m really beginning to wonder what has changed.
“Was he out again last night?” Sophie asks as I throw my phone into my bag and start to bag up the dresses to work on them Monday.
“Yep. I made dinner for his birthday last night, but he didn’t get home until 5am. From the state of him this morning he had a good night and plenty female company" I tell her.
“What do you mean female company? I saw that video that Tom posted with all his work colleagues” she says
“Who won’t have seen that video, even his mum will see that video. I’m talking about the fact his face was covered in 3 or 4 different shades of lipstick.” I show her the picture I took when I first saw him this morning.
“what are you thinking?” she asks sympathetically
“Exactly what you said the last time he stayed out to stupid o’clock. He’s getting attention elsewhere. It’s the only explanation I can come up with Sophie. It’s been like this for months now. I just don’t want to believe it you know" I say as I slump on the couch in the show room.
“Alice. I don’t know what else to say. You have to approach him about it. Tell him what you’re feeling and thinking, if he can’t see what he’s ruining then he’s not worth it.” She says as she comforts me. I nod in response. She’s right, I need to speak to him about it, I’m fed up of thinking he’s cheating on me, if there is something wrong with our relationship we need to either try fix it or split up. Four years together is too long to throw away though. He’s the only guy I’ve ever been with. I never had boyfriends at high school, four years is a long time to throw away without talking about it. Right?
After locking up the shop and heading home I get back just before 2pm, noticing Martin’s car is not on the drive, he must still be at home as he would have left his car at the bank last night or the club wherever he was. I head inside to hear his mum and dads’ voices, laughing and joking with Martin.
“hey guys" I say as I enter the lounge, Martins parents have always been lovely. They are an amazing couple and were so happy when Martin proposed.
“Alice sweetie how are you?” Dianna says as she stands to hug me. “I’m good, just finished work" I tell her as his dad hugs me also.
“Martin was just telling us about last night at the club he went to" she says all excited. I just nod my head and head to the kitchen to make a coffee for myself. Seeing that the other cups are still fresh. They must have just arrived then.
“When you collecting your car?” I ask Martin when I return to the lounge.
“where is your car? I thought you went out after your birthday dinner Alice made for you?” Dianna asks him directly, clearly not happy now she knows I wasted my efforts of cooking for him.
“I went straight out from the office, mum. It’s at the bank, I’ll go get it later" he says fiddling with his fingers. Dianna tuts and shakes her head at him. The conversation soon changes, and they are all joking about again. From the outside looking in, we look like a normal couple but deep down I know things have changed he can’t even look me in the eye anymore, he is clearly avoiding the subject of last night. I can’t wait for the day to end.
After his parents leave, I head to do the laundry picking up Martin’s shirt from last night that he left on the bathroom floor, I instantly smell a woman’s perfume, very strong smell. Sickly sweet. Plenty female company last night then. I shake my head as I head to the washing machine throwing in the clothes slamming the door shut.
“Alice honey, I’m sorry about last night. It was only supposed to be one drink with them for my birthday.” He goes on to tell me, I just nod my head, not really listening to his excuses anymore. I’ve heard them all before, far too many times. I don’t know how I can keep this going, I feel like a foul thinking he is the one for me.
“Do you fancy going out for dinner, we could grab a cab go for food then I’ll collect my car?” he asks as he walks up behind me and wraps his arms around my waist. “yeah, sound like a plan. I’m in no mood to cook again. I’ll go get changed then we can head out” he nods, placing a kiss on my forehead and letting me go. Is he making an effort or making up for his guilty conscience? Let’s see how this goes then.
We head out about 45 minutes later and do what Martin suggested. It was good, no awkwardness at all. Just like old times when we first started dating. I tried to find out more about last night, but he clams up and changes the subject. Which I knew would happen but I thought I would try my luck. We didn’t stay out too late, Martin starting to feel more hungover as the night went on. So, we decided to head home and chill in front if the TV. When we got back, we both changed into our pyjamas and sat in front of the TV watching a movie.
Cuddled up on the sofa everything was nice and relaxed. I was getting a little horny, so I started kissing his neck while running my fingers up and down his chest, he soon put a stop to it saying he wasn’t feeling well. Typical. Around 1030pm we called it a night and headed to bed, Martin was really suffering but I wasn’t giving him any sympathy. It is his fault for drinking for nearly 10 hours last night and hardly getting any sleep and doing god only knows what else, with god knows who.
I woke up on Sunday morning with Martin’s arms wrapped around me. I smiled at that. Since we’ve not had s*x in a few months any contact I do get I welcome it with open arms. As I snuggle closer to him I realise he is still sound asleep, checking the clock on the side table I see it is just after 8am, a bit early for a Sunday but we did go to bed earlier than normal for a Saturday. Martin starts to mumble a little in his sleep the words not making any sense until he says “Sammy” as he grinds his erection into my back.
I lie there frozen, my brain working overtime ‘who the hell is Sammy?’ He soon stops mumbling and soft snores are coming from him. His erection still poking my back, but he’s not erect for me. Sammy is the name he said not Alice. I quickly but quietly pull away from him and head to the bathroom. I look in the mirror as tears flow down my face, I’m not trying to stop them either, I need to let this all out. Maybe I’m over thinking it, but it hurts he mumbled another woman’s name in our bed with me in his arms. Does he even realise how much he is hurting me? His actions are killing me inside.
Pushing the thoughts to the back of my mind, I quickly wash and change and head through to make some breakfast. When I’m feeling down, pancakes always make me feel better. Following my mum’s recipe, I quickly start flipping them in the pan while sipping my coffee.
“Mmm pancakes yum. Morning baby" Martin says as he comes into the kitchen, freshly showered, and kisses my cheek. I slightly cringe, I don’t know why, I feel uncomfortable after this morning.
“Morning, sleep ok?” I ask as I instantly remember his mumbled words earlier.
“Yeah. Perfect sleep" he says as he pours his coffee. Perfect sleep thinking of another woman I say to myself.
Sunday is soon over with, and to be honest I’m thankful. As I’m climbing into bed Martin getting his clothes ready for work in the morning. I silently study him as I think back to all the times he’s been out with his colleagues or friends, his behaviour changing, suddenly. He very rarely invites me anymore unless it’s a special occasion like a birthday or anniversary. I really don’t want to believe he’s cheating but the signs all point to it being true. He just isn’t the same man I fell in love with. As I roll over a tears flow from my eye, again, quickly wiping them away, Martin climbing in shortly after, our backs to each other, not talking or saying a word. I fall asleep knowing this can’t go on much longer, I can’t do this to myself anymore.
The working week has gone quickly, Thursdays are normally our busiest day which means leaving later than normal. Today it’s not as bad, the bridal parties expected have collected their gowns early and I am on my way home, hoping to get a chance to speak to Martin when he comes in from work. We need to talk about where we are heading. Pulling up in the drive I notice a strange car sitting on the street and Martins on the drive, not thinking much of it. I head into our house, soon stopping when I hear noises from further in the house.
As I walk further into the house, my stomach twists, and my heart stops as I hear the noises clearer and louder. A females giggling and laughing coming from somewhere, maybe the lounge? As I stand in the hallway trying to figure out where the noise is coming from, yeah, you guessed it my bedroom.
I walk up to my room push the door open and I nearly vomit at the sight in front of me. Martin’s head in between some woman’s legs, his naked ass in the air. She moans and groans his name as she orgasms in my bed with my fiancée. In my shocked state I just stand there and watch for I do not know how long. It’s not until I hear a slap sound that I shake myself from this state and notice that they are now actually f*****g, doggy style at that. My face wet with tears.
“You enjoying that Martin??” I say as I walk to the closet and grabbing my bags from the back corner. All I can think about is getting out of there, I grab my clothes and shove them in my case, I quickly go to the bathroom gather my toiletries. Tears still falling and I don’t bother wiping them. It is then I realise that they haven’t actually stopped, he’s still pounding into her. He never heard me at the door. He hasn’t even noticed my presence. I stand at the bathroom door watching his facial expression as he slams into her, a smile on his face, biting his bottom lip, eyes closed. He used to do that with me. I can’t watch it anymore. Tears running down my face, my heart breaking, and he is smiling. I go back to the closet grab my fully packed cases, well rammed with clothes not neatly or anything, and leave them beside the door, go to my beside table grabbing my stuff from there, I take off my engagement ring slam it down hard and that’s when he notices me. He snaps his head in my direction.
“Alice" he whispers shocked to see me. But he still slowly thrusts into the slut “baby why did you stop?" the slut lying under him asks as she follows his line of sight and sees me standing there. Not even bothering to cover herself up, lying naked on my bed sheets, yeah I bought those not two weeks ago.
“Sorry to interrupt, I’m just collecting my things and then I will be leaving.” I say as I stare into his eyes as tears stream down my cheeks. He looks from me to the girl underneath him, the girl he still has his c**k buried in, then back to me.
“Alice. Wait. Please I can explain" he shouts after me as I hear him stumbling about. Leaving more of my stuff by the front door, the pile of bags getting bigger, I head back into the spare room to collect some paperwork, passport and bits and bobs I have in there, just as Martin is frantically shouting “Sammy just get dressed and go I need to sort this". Sort this. This. What a joke. Heading to the lounge, I’m a woman on a mission, there is no stopping me now, no way in hell will I walk back into this place, I need to make sure I have all the important things, I quickly grab my bluetooth speaker, power bank and laptop, packing them away in my laptop case. Having a quick glance around not seeing anything I want to take, everything in here I bought with Martin, or for Martin, nothing matters now. I head to the hall picking up the only picture I have in this house that means anything, the picture of my parents before they left for holiday.
“Alice please, stop. Let’s talk about it, I’m sorry" I don’t listen. I swing the door open and head to my car, leaving my laptop bag on the front seat, I head back to collect my cases. Pulling them out and putting them in the boot of my car. All the while Martin stands trying to get himself dressed, as the slut Sammy slips out behind him and jumps into her car.
“How long? How long have you been f*****g Sammy?” I shout as I head back to get the last bag of clothes and the bag with my paperwork.
“I’m sorry. Alice please come back inside so we can talk about this.” He grabs my elbow. I push him back with all my strength as I yell
“How f*****g long?” I stare at him, nose flaring my heart beating so fast in my chest it hurts. As I put a hand on my chest, to try ease the pain. The pain that he has caused. It doesn’t work though. I’m struggling to breath and all he can do is stare at the ground.
“A month" he whispers as he drops his shoulders and runs his hands over his head.
“A month. I f*****g knew it. That’s why you never touched me. You were getting it elsewhere. Do I really mean that little to you. In our bed Martin. I hope she was worth it. Four years Martin. You really are something else. I gave you four years of my life and you throw it away just like that. For her. Were there others? In fact, don’t answer that I don’t want to hear it. I don’t want to ever see your face again" I say as I walk to my car slamming the door shut. As I pull out of the drive I roll down the window and throw my house key at his feet.