Prelude 2

2317
We suddenly halted in front of a royal blue, with a touch of gold, door. Tumingala ako para makita ang buong kaanyuan noon. There's a tag that says "Private Room" in cursive font. Madaming private room dito but I can definitely say that this one is the best door among them all. "Wait mo lang ako, bebe girl. Hintayin mo ako dito, ha? Don't go anywhere." Lumapit pa si JC sa akin at bumulong sa tainga ko, with his creepy look. "My monsters... Awuuuuuuh~" Lumayo na ito sa akin at humawak na sa seradura at sumulyap ulit sa akin. Parang nabuhusan ako ng isang toneladang yelo noon nang narinig ang sinabi noong bakla. There's no way that he or she or whatever, would leave me without any companion here! "No! You're leaving with me!" matigas na sinabi ko noon habang hinihila ang laylayan ng kanyang damit. "Huh? No, bebe girl. You cannot," nakangisi nitong sinabi at mukhang plano talaga akong takutin. "Your grammar is so eeeww. But, anyway, just don't leave me here!" pagmamaktol ko pa at hindi ko na maiwasang ipadyak ang mga paa ko. I didn't care kung pinagtitinginan na kami ng ibang customers dahil it's much better na rin para mapilitan si JC na isama na ako sa loob. Ang duwag kong puso noon ay walang katapang-tapang, taliwas sa ipinapakita ko tuwing pakiramdam ko'y naaapi ako. I managed to put up a dauntless facade but behind it was a very timid me before. Sa isip-isip ko noon, walang lugar ang mga lalampa-lampa sa lugar at sa mundong ito. Walang maidudulot ang takot at pangamba. Dapat kailangan na matapang dahil kapag nakita nila ang kahinaan mo, gagamitin nila iyon laban sayo. Iyon ang isang bagay na tinatak sa akin ng isang malapit na kaibigan dati. Pero kung iisipin ngayon, natanto ko na... sadyang mas matapang akong mag-isip noong bata pa ako. Thinking of all the obstacles and epiphanies I'd suffer before because of my silly antics and cowardice combined, people might bet that I'd chose to bury those six feet under the ground, but no. Rather, I'd bargain anything just to reminisce it every now and then. Because after all, those memories and past experiences served as the lessons and warning sings of what to do and what not to do, respectively. Pumasok na kami sa loob ng pribadong silid habang buhat-buhat pa rin ng bakla kaya iginala ko ang paningin sa kabuuan nito. As I thought, maganda rito. Ang ilang salamin ay pinalilibutan ng maliliit na bumbilya, iyong parang madalas na ginagamit ng mga professional artists! Mga vanity mirros and tables. At syempre, kompleto rin sa accesories at mga gamit ang bawat tukador. Nakita ko pa nga ang ibang magagarbong damit na nakasabit sa isang open-cabinet, e. Sa hindi kalayuan, may narinig kaming mga taong nag-uusap. Doon ata iyon sa loob ng curtain divider kaya naglakad kami (I mean, si JC) upang makapasok doon. At may narinig kaming dalawang tao na abala sa pag-uusap. The moment we entered that smaller room, napanganga ako sa nakita ko! Isang babaeng nasa mid-20 ang edad. At si. Oh my gosh! It's Colt, atlast! He looked so cool especially when he's serious, as if he's very determined to do something and kill it. "Uyy." Sabay kiliti sa tagiliran ko. "Kinikilig ang puwet ni Bebe Girl sa kanyang prince charming. 'Wag umihi. Baka nakakalimutan mong kalong pa kita," panunukso sa akin ni GayC. Umirap ako. "Like duh?" "Ay, grabe itong paslit na 'to. Mas matanda ka sa'kin? Mas matanda ka?" Hindi ko na lang inimikan ang patutsada nito at ni-signal na ibaba na ako mula sa kalong. Baka kung ano pang isipin ni Colt kapag nakita niya pa iyon. Like, wala ba akong paa kaya ako nagpapakalong? Back then, I would always thought... I was already nine years old. A matured woman. And I could apply makeups on if I wanted to. Besides, I could handle those already because as I've said, I was a fine lady. A matured one. Screw those spoiled brats. Wala silang dulot sa akin. Ayos sana kung ganoon pa rin ang prinsipyo mo sa buhay habambuhay. Pero bata pa lang ako noon kaya nasasabi ko ang mga ganoong bagay. But as I grew older, most of the time, things are easier said than done even if sky's the only limit you have. "And then, ganito naman. Gets mo ba?" "Yeah." "Good. Try it naman." Napukaw ang pansin ko nila Colt. Hindi pa yata napansin na may pumasok which insulted my nine-year-old version. Hindi ba ako kapansin-pansin? I thought then frowned. Lumakad siya papalapit sa isang artificial head at pinag-eksperimentuhan ang buhok noon, which was obviously a wig. Hinawakan niya ang ilang hibla noong wig sa tuktok na part and then bundled it. Ang gwapo niya tingnan lalo na nang maging focused siya habang nakalabas nang konti ang dila para basain ang pang-ibabang labi tuwing nanunuyo iyon sa pagiging abala. Pero... Nagulat ako sa ginagawa niya kasi naka-focus lang talaga ako sa kanya! OMG! Was it real? Was it for real? Tama ba ako kung nakikita kong nagpapaturo siyang magtali ng mga basic hair braids? Ghad! Bakit? Dahil ba iyon sa akin? Dahil ba nahiya siya kahapon? Paano, nalaman kong hindi siya marunong magtali! Was he doing this for me? I assumed before. That's when I began creating my selfish world around us. That I neglected to notice something or someone else. That was more deserving of my attention. "Hi, bessy!" Lahat kami napalingon kay GayC nang tumili ito para tawagin iyong dalagang babaeng nagtuturo. Pati si Colt ay na-distract sa concentration niya pero nagawa pa ring mapalingon sa katabi ko nang may bahid na iritasyon sa mukha. His lips parted when his gaze drifted towards me. Gulat siya nang makitang nasa tabi pala ako ng sumigaw. Bigla siyang napabitaw sa pagkakahawak sa wig at ni-compose ang sarili. Okay. Medyo amazed ako sa pagkataranta niya noon! "JC! Bibigyan mo ba ako ng atake sa puso?!" Sabay hawak sa dibdib at buga ng hangin na sigaw ng babae kay GayC. "Atake talaga?" Tumawa siya. "Pwede bang ako nalang ang umatake dyan sa puso mo? Uh... Chos." Nameke ng ubo si JC at pinamulahan ng pisngi. Humarap ulit ako kay Colt. Nakatiklop ang mga braso sa harap ng dibdib at nakataas ang isang kilay while looking down at my... knees? Oh! May sugat nga pala ako! Pasimple kong binaba ang laylayan ng palda ko at nag-aalinlangang ngumiti sa kanya. Medyo napaatras ako nang konti dahil unti-unti na pala siyang naglalakad patungo sa akin. Nananatiling nakatiklop pa rin ang mga braso at nakataas ang isang kilay. "Why are you here, Kuring?" tanong niya, mahina lang. May pagkairita iyon kaya nataranta na naman ako sa pwesto. "I-I was about to... uh... cut my hair?" Napahawak ako sa dulo ng buhok ko. "I-I want it short." And then suddenly, I was startled when he slapped my hand on my hair. "What?! You want it shorter? Cut?! No!" tuloy-tuloy na sabi ni Colt. Galit na galit siya nang marinig ang sinabi kong rason kung bakit ako nasa parlor. Napatikom ako ng bibig at yumuko. Seeing him that mad made me so emotional. Especially when he'd gone mad because of me. I just couldn't accept that. Little did I know, Colt had become my refuge. My world. Masyado akong nalulong sa pagpukaw ng kanyang atensiyon. Para sa akin, siya lang ang kailangan ko at hindi na mahalaga pa ang maraming kaibigan. He'd make a world for me. Kaya naman hindi ko namamalayan, habang nagtatagal... nagiging toxic na rin. Kaonting galit niya lang ay mababahala na ako, matatakot. Takot ako masyadong maiwan niya. That's why I was willing to do my best to change what made him angry with me. Lagi iyon. Ganoon lagi. "Hey..." Biglang lumambot ang boses niya. He even tried to remove my hands on my face. He lifted up my chin to look straightly at my eyes. I remained silent. Pero hindi ko mapigilan. Napasinghot ako at napalabi. Ayaw ko kasi tumulo 'yung luha ko. Lalo lang tumubo ang aking nguso. "You know what?" he said then heaved a deep sigh. "I'm sorry. I-I just don't want your hair... short. Your hair's better when it's... l-long. You know." Napakamot siya sa batok niya at iniwas ang tingin sa akin. He frowned and released his hand on my chin. I didn't know but my tears were already gone that time. What happened?! I thought I just had a heart attack! I couldn't breath properly! Was it highblood?! Yaya Jupiter used to feel this way! I bit my lower lip and glanced at the opposite side, too. "O-Okay," I inhaled. "Then I won't." "Tss." He looked at me sharply. Bigla niya akong pinaupo at napasinghap ako nang lumuhod siya sa harapan ko. This scene is so familiar! I always saw this on television! Was he going to... uh... to... what do you call that? Ah! To propose?! "Ahhh!" Suddenly, I shrieked. He pressed my wounds for Rainbow's sake! It hurts! "Tss." Tumayo siya at hinila ako para makatayo tulad niya. "We're going. Thanks," suplado niyang paalam sa kanila GayC na parang hindi na naman kami napansin dahil abala na sa pakikipaglampungan kasama iyong babae. "Hey!" I shrilled again. Pagkalabas kasi namin ng parlor ay bigla siyang umupo sa semento at hindi ko inaasahang bubuhatin niya ako sa kanyang likod. Naglakad na si Colt papunta sa bahay siguro namin or sa bahay nila. I didn't know. All I knew that time was he's carrying me because... he cared. I remained silent, feeling every moment of that time. "You're wounded." "Hmm?" I tried to move my head to him but he evaded it by turning his head on the other side. I blushed again. If ever, I might've kissed him in case he didn't do that! Hala! After that, hindi na siya nagsalita. Sa bahay nila kami pumunta. Like the usual, his parents were nowhere to be found that moment. Binaba na niya ako and then umuna ulit siya maglakad. "Just wait me here." I looked at his back. "Where are you going?" "Just up there. You wait!" Then he continued going upstairs and stomped his feet. I thought I just got him pissed again. Kahit kailan talaga, napakabugnutin! Umupo ako sa sofa nila and then hugged their throw pillow like I was always doing every time I visit here. And then there, I saw Colt. Pababa na siya. He was holding something on his right hand. Was it a toolbox? Was he freaking kidding me? Nang makapunta na siya sa harapan ko, umupo siya sa aking tabi at hinila ang binti ko para tignan ang sugat. Ganoon lagi. Aawayin niya ako pero hindi kalaunan, siya rin ang mag-aasikaso sa akin kapag napahamak. "Are you going to pukpok my knees?" I asked nervously. "Stupid!" He gave me a deadly look before staring at my knees again. He opened the toolbox and there I saw it. It's a first-aid kit pala. I'm so stupid nga talaga. He put some dark liquid on the cotton and dumped it on my wounds. His hands were so gentle that I could take a sleep now. "Ahh!" Napasigaw ako nang lakasan niya ng diin ang bulak sa mismong sugat ko! Dinampot ko ang throw pillow na nakatakip sa hita ko at binato sa kanya iyon! "Ano ba, Kuring!" daing niya. Diniinan niya ulit ang cotton sa sugat ko pagkatapos niyang ihagis sa malayo ang unan na inihagis ko sa kanya. What! "You stop! It hurts!" I wiped a bead of tear on my eye. Seriously, it really was painful, alright! "F-Fine." He panicked a fraction and exhaled. "Stop crying..." Nagpatuloy lang sa pagdaloy ang mga luha ko. Colt! Isusumbong ko siya kay Mommy! Then I felt something weird. Inangat niya pala ang tuhod ko patungo sa kaniya. I removed my hands on my face to look at him. To know what he was going to do next when I saw and felt that he's blowing gently on my wounds. Eventually, the pain pacified a little bit when he did that. Tanging hikbi na lang ang nagagawa ko ngunit wala nang luha. When he's finished, tumayo na siya at umalis without an adieu. I felt guilty when I thought I made him feel guilty. Well, he should be guilty because he did something to be guilt for. Sometimes, his jokes were not funny anymore. Gusto niya laging sinasaktan ako. Unti-unti nang humuhupa ang hikbi ko. Sinandal ko ang katawan sa sofa at niyakap ang panibagong throw pillow. It was nice to be a kid. Having little shallow problems and just by throwing a tantrum, you'd get what you wanted. I closed my eyes. Hanggang sa marinig ko ang ilang yabag ng paa sa staircase nila Colt. Alam ko naman na siya iyon at gusto ko lang ipakita sa kanya na nagtatampo ako. Totoong minsan ay sumusobra na siya. Ever since, he always wanted to make fun of me. Or to play with my feelings. Hindi ko alam kung may ideya ba siya na simula pa man noong mga bata pa kami, nang mga siyam na gulang pa lang kami, ay siya na ang hinahanap-hanap at tinitibok ng puso ko. Or so I thought? It took my years for it to dawn onto me. Was it really love? Or a freaking romance without progress? We've been living beside each other for years. Baka naman... nasanay lang? O dahil ba iyon sa napupunan niyang pangungulila sa akin... dulot ng kung ano sa misteryong nakaraan? Palapit nang palapit ang mga hakbang ng paa sa puwesto ko. Then I felt that the spot beside me on the couch moved so I assumed that he sat down there. I heared him sighed and paused... "I'm sorry for being mean to you." His voice was so serious that I almost couldn't figure out it was him. It was a serious matter now. He's apologizing to me... now. What happened to the earth? I felt something fuzzy inside my tummy and I couldn't figure out what it was. Pero kahit na ganon, I did my best not to move even a single inch. I didn't want to interrupt him- *kiss* Unexpectedly, he left a kiss on my forehead. And I knew that that moment, I wasn't dreaming. It wasn't a dream... Mga bata pa lang at wala pang muwang sa realidad ng mundo kaya naman, pinili ko na lang na magpakasaya muna habang bata pa, walang ideya na sa pagdating ng panahon... Ang pagiging masaya ay siya pang magdudulot ng matinding pangamba sa akin.
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