In Dreams: One Soul

A Long Story

Harlee POV (POV stands for Point of View and will be abbreviated throughout the rest of this story)

I searched through Zeev's memories as I toweled off my hair, and the best explanation I could come up with was power

"So it's like a battery, that has to be recharged?"  I asked.  Zeev sighed.

"It's more complicated than that.  Look, I don't know how to explain this to a human because it doesn't really have any correlation to any experience you have.  When we're created we are given power from the Divine-God, if you will.  When we Fall, we are cut off from that power, but the essence remains, it's just that it's slowly sapped of its goodness, light, virtue, strength, I don't know if there's an adequate word for it.  We can still use our power, but it becomes corrupted, the results..are not always stable, or as anticipated.  For someone like me, that can be dangerous.  Imagine driving your car down the road and all the buttons, pedals and even the steering wheel start doing things they weren't intended to do.  Worse, there's an accident up ahead, but if you push the brake pedal, you might accelerate or simply turn on the radio, who knows?"  Zeev waved a hand.

"Human souls, no matter how wicked are touched by the Divine-created by the Divine.  Consuming them helps re-stabilize.  Keeps all the car buttons and things doing what they're supposed to."  He explained.

"But it can also increase your power.  I saw that in your head too."  I pointed out and he grimaced.

"Some use them for that too.  Yes.  A soul willingly given is much more powerful."  Zeev answered.  I nodded.

"Why me?"  I asked quietly for the hundredth time.  Zeev flinched.

"You were the closest one."  He told me again for the hundredth time.  I knew it was true.  I had seen the incident from his viewpoint and mine, but still, it never stopped hurting.  I clutched my chest.  Zeev moved across the room and pulled my chest to his, as if trying to unite the two pieces of soul.

"I guess I really do have to call it our soul now."  I said running a finger down his sternum where I could almost feel the beat of his Demon Heart, fused to the other half of my soul.

"I'm still going to try to find a way to separate it."  Zeev said with an anguished voice.  I shook my head.

"You can't.  Look what it's doing.  You know as well as I do that those two pieces are becoming more tightly bound.  Your Demon Heart was seeking Divinity.  It found it in a living human soul.  My soul won't be consumed because the other half is here."  I laid a hand on my chest.  "It's sustaining you, but it's trapping us both.  But hey-at least you won't have to eat any more humans for a while."  I joked and then choked back a sob.  Zeev hugged me tightly.

"There's one other option.  I could give you my Heart."  He said softly.  I jerked back to look at him.

"What is that supposed to mean?"  I asked him incredulously.

"If I gave up my life, and gave you my Heart, you would have your soul back, but you would become a Demon in turn and the Heart would eventually consume your soul.  Then I'm afraid you'd be stuck in the same position again-devouring one human after another to maintain yourself, fighting constantly for your life.  But, you would be whole."  Zeev told me.  I pulled away from him.

"No.  No!  I'd rather you keep your half than go through all that."  I clutched at my chest as it began to ache.  Zeev smiled lightly.

"You may one day change your mind."  He said softly, but pulled me back to his chest, the ache in mine quieted.

Zeev POV

I stared at the sleeping human in my arms, watching her dreams scatter across my vision.  What on Earth had made me offer her my Heart?  Had I really grown tired of living?  I suppose I had.  I was tired of being hunted, chased.  If I could give up my life so another could live peacefully, well I think I might actually be ok with that now.  The soul light began glowing where our bodies touched.  I shook my head.  What the Hell was wrong with me?  I clutched at the new ache in my chest where the Divine was warring with the Demonic.  It's not that I didn't care for others, it's just that I had learned to care more for myself, and now...the throb in my chest reminded me that some part of my Grace remained.  But I would not go back to that senseless killing!  I clenched my fist.  'But did you ever really stop?'  Something whispered to me in the dark.  I gritted my teeth.  If only Demons needed sleep.

Harlee POV

When I woke up on the morning Zeev looked like the one who'd had a hard night.  There were dark circles under his eyes and his hair was sticking up everywhere like he'd been tossing and turning all night long.  I ran through his night memories, but he pulled them back behind his barrier.

"You look awful."  I observed.

"Thanks-I can see that through your eyes.  No need to remind me."  Zeev stated dryly.

"You want some breakfast?"  I asked him.

"You know Demons don't need to eat-like that."  Zeev said tiredly.

"I know-but you like to-sometimes."  I responded then tried again to reach out through our connection.  He slammed the barrier down hard.  Our soul pieces cringed respectively, I could feel the ache on both sides, so he let up a little to relieve the pain.

"Don't do that again please."  I panted, holding my chest like I'd just run a mile.  Zeev grimaced.

"Sorry, instinct."  He replied, turning his head.  I frowned.  After our fights over the soul fragments, we were usually closer.  Why had he suddenly drawn away?  My chest ached and I rubbed it.  Plus-hadn't we, somehow?  My head snapped up.

"Zeev-what happened last night, exactly?"  I opened my mind to him fully, showing him the images I meant-the creature ringed in fire looking at me-us in the mirror.  He flinched

"I uh...I'm not really sure."  He laughed nervously.  "I would normally have said that was a possession, but that was unlike any possession I've ever been a part of.  It was almost like you possessed me for a bit, or somehow we managed to recreate a weaker, no not weaker-different-version of my Angelic form in the possessed state-but our consciousnesses even fused and that's not normal.  Usually the possessing entity takes over the body and retains all of the host's memories, etc.  Yes, they can let he host go about their business and 'sleep' in the background, but this was more like..."

"We became one."  I said.  Zeev swallowed and nodded.

"I don't think that's safe.  I think it might have happened because of the split soul and the fusion with my Heart, but...it's not natural, and it could be dangerous for you, for us."  Zeev continue.

"I don't know he, she, we, they, felt pretty powerful, and right, for the first time in months."  I responded, rubbing at my chest.  He pulled me onto his lap and dropped the barrier a little more, helping to ease the ache.

"Angels don't have a gender-they can be whatever they want.  Their True Forms often incorporate parts of animals, much like Demons.  We just try to look like you so we don't scare you.  You couldn't actually bear the sight of one of us normally."  Zeev said, his chin resting on top of my head.

"That's comforting."  I grumbled.  I leaned my head on his chest.  I could almost feel our soul trying to connect itself.  If I just let go a little...

"Harlee!"  Zeev had transported across the room.  "What did I just say?!"  I blinked drowsily at him.

"What did I do?"  I asked, confused.  I felt him searching my mind for intent.

"You didn't do that on purpose?"  It was a statement and a question.

"Do what?"  I yawned and got up, my stomach growling.  I reached back through the connection he had established, hunting for clues.  Shocked, he shut me down.  I grinned evilly.

"A door, once opened, may be stepped through in either direction."  I smirked walking past Zeev, patting him on the shoulder.  He stared at me dumbfounded.

"That was badly quoted."  He remarked, pulling the memory up for me.  I pounced the link again, turning in my steps to grab his arms.  I gasped as I saw the memory from his viewpoint, the white light enveloping us both-what he called 'soul light', our bodies melting down until he stepped out of the space.  It happened so quickly.

"What the Hell is that?"  I whispered.

"Whenever that happens, I feel your soul trying to unite with you, and my Grace and.."  Zeev clenched his jaw and sank against the door frame, clutching his heart.

"You are one whiny Demon today."  I remarked, walking up to him and grabbing his hand.  "Come on, I'm starved."

Zeev POV

Harlee was right.  How long since emotion had ruled me like this?  Not since my Fall, when I was tormented by my decision.  Not since the first time I had to shred apart a human for their soul to save my life after vowing never to kill again.  Not since ripping into that first Angel, one I had fought beside for so long...

"Zeev!"  Harlee slapped me.  "Stop.  Please."  She was gasping, one hand gripping her shirt, her face running with tears.  "It hurts."  She whispered.

"I know."  I replied.