I'd Rather Be In Love With . . .

My last day? Ha. That was no different than any other day here in this shithole. I was just another laughing stock except for today, everyone felt the urge to stand there laughing as the freak was pushing into the swimming pool. A drowning girl hitting all their funny buttons until the janitor came by jumping in to drag me to the surface. My throat ached from coughing up water and my arms were shaky from the constant attempts at swimming. My jeans clung to my skin wet, but my shirt was foating in the water with the blindfold that Kate had somehow used when her lackeys jumped me right before I could escape. My sister? She stood there chuckling, finding the whole thing a joke. When she could finally see the tears behind my eyes I got the usual speech. "Maybe if you changed, you wouldn't be left feeling so shitty." I know. Sister of the year award goes too. . . Zara. Pff. At least I'm out of here in two months. Just two more months When we finally arrived home, I jumped out the car and slammed the door shut making it clear to hell that I was pissed off at her. I also made the point of not talking to her on the way home; but then again, she didn't even try and talk to me. Well, at least she can tell I'm not letting this one go. I did not make myself a freak! I never chose it either! UGH! But the thing that gets me the most is that she can stop it...well not fully, the thoughts would still be there...BUT STILL!! Her whole screwed up motto is 'You can make it change...If you try hard enough.' Hard enough my ass! "Come on Fay! Stop being such a baby! You know what I said is true, look at me. I worked hard to get to where I am now." She said the last part proudly as she leaned over the hood of the car. I stopped stomping away as I reached the top of the stairs, facing the front door and turned to face her. I could feel all the anger rising to the surface. "Yeah, You're a popular girl, you're also a b***h, stuck up, two-faced cow who I have to call sister!" I know that was a bit over the top, but if you were me right now you'd know about it. I quickly turned on my heel and banged my fist against the door. I could already imagine my sister standing there, her mouth wide open and her hands on her hips thinking of something smart to say back. Not that she needs to think about it...she never does, another thing I WISH I had! But this time she didn't, ok fine she didn't get the chance cause my mum decided to come out right then. "Hi, hon..." She cut off as I stormed in and ran straight up the stairs. "Ok...bad day!?!" She screamed up at me. Duh! What does she think?! I mean even on the last day I can't get away from those...those...FREAK KILLERS!!! "No! Just like any other heavenly day!" I screamed back down sarcastically. I took a left and then slammed my bedroom door shut. Just as I walked forward to my bed I thought better of it and decided to run back and fully depose of my anger. "And no! A BAD, FAKE SISTER!" Once I was fully done I slammed the door shut. I dropped my bag down on the floor and flopped down on my bed face flat. Ok, that worked a bunch! NOT!! Why does my sister have to be like that? Why can't she just hang out with me AT school for just ONE day? At least it would tone down most of those arrogant pricks! Well, at least we're going to different colleges...AWAY from everyone! Ah damn. That means I'll have to stay away from mums pasta and chocolate cake. NO. Yeah, yeah, yeah I'm moving to the furthest away college I possibly can, and yes I will be living at college. Well, only one thing was achieved by this...Did I get my mind off my sister and freak killers? (Even though they're not killing me...on the outside.) I need to think of something constructive to do with my two whole months. Hmm, sleeping in sounds GREAT!... Nah I'll get bored. Sunday: Family dinner. Tuesday: Another half of family dinner. (We have a big family!) Wednesday: Dinner with....NO ONE!! Monday: Mum and dad start to visit aunt and uncle. Friday: Dinner with neighbors and crazy son. Saturday: Go see football match with dad. Tuesday: HAVE NO CLUE! Thursday: Another dinner but with friends, (My parent's friends...I don't have any.) Sunday: HAVE NO CLUE! Ok well, that's awhile to decide what I have to do. For now, though I think I'll just sit and do any homework which I wasn't bothered to do during the year, at least it's something to do for now anyway. ~~~~~~~A few hours later of unsuccessful math work ~~~~~~~~ I sat there, my head resting in my palm as my pen flicked against the table over and over. Why the hell don't I still get this?! We went through it last year for god's sake! Yes I know, I don't need to bother with this cause schools over, but damn does it get on my nerves that I can't do this anymore! Oh well, maths always was my weak point. Hmm...That's it! I'll burn all my maths books! Nah not worth the movement of going downstairs to get the matches. I wonder if I can just live up here in my room forever? Nothing to worry about and nothing to hurt me. My head snapped up to the side as three knocks accrued on the door. I sighed heavily as I knew who it was already. Great! She's back for another round! I don't have time for this s**t; I mean I still worry that I'll still be a freak in college! She'll just end up making it worse. I mean isn't that what sisters do? I let my head bang down on the desk with my hands flat on either side of my never-gonna-finish pile of maths overdue homework. I groaned and eventually muttered a 'come in' how she heard I will never know. "Look, Zara, I'm not in the mood, so if you've come to start then just....." she cut me off as she leaned against the door frame with her arms folded. "Fay all I'm trying to say is that....if acting like you isn't working then...change, just a little. I mean look at your clothes, baggy stuff not good! And that geek! The one next door, please Fay!?! What happened to when you were younger, you weren't all...boyish," "Yeah, but I grew up, I found my style and the things I like doing, I'm not gonna change for anyone. They either like me for me...or...." "So your gonna go on like this, just being the freak?" I sighed not wanting to admit that I'm harder to break than that. "You're going to college, it's a new start....don't mess it up like high school," "What would you know?! You don't get what it's like to be me; you don't get called a freak every day and then get....beaten up for not liking the same typical s**t as everyone else." "Yeah but why doesn't it happen to me? Because I changed, you know what? Stay the same Fay and see where it gets you," "I will! And I'll find someone who likes me for me." I screamed back at her as she walked out and closed her door shut.