I hate him

2309 Words
Carina The car comes to a screeching halt in front of the hospital, and I am jumping out the door before Carter can even switch off the engine. I ran to the reception area, almost pushing an old lady out of the way. I apologize as I run past her, but I don’t stop until I am almost jumping over the counter. “We are here for Gwen Cullen. She is in labor.” I add as a last thought. The receptionist quickly gives me the room and floor and I sprint off again, taking the stairs two at a time. I have never been more thankful that my best friend is married to a billionaire, I would’ve never gotten this quick service otherwise. “Will you slow the f**k down.” Carter grumbles, not far behind me. “I am trying to get away from you!” I shout as I keep running. “What the hell did I do?” He asks, sounding offended. “You nearly f*****g killed me like ten times on the way here. I think I lost my stomach and my heart halfway between my house and the hospital.” I tell him, slowing down to give him time to catch up, or so I tell myself. I exercise more than the average person but running up stairs has never been my strong point. Carter passes me and then opens the door leading to the hallway Gwen is currently lying in and I step past him, giving him a grateful smile as I try not to show how tired I am from running up three flights of stairs. “If you wanted to get away from me that badly, you should’ve taken the lifts. I f*****g hate getting in that death trap.” He says. “Ha! If I wasn’t so scared of that box of doom, I would’ve laughed at finding a weakness in the big bad alpha male, but alas, I am scared shitless by them and will keep your secret safe with me.” I tell him and he shakes his head at me. Just then, I look up to find Jaxon standing just a few feet away from us. I quickly look past him, refusing to give him even a second of my attention. Three months ago, I didn’t hear a word from him, now I get a call from him and find him standing just a few feet away all in one day and that while I look like s**t after cooking and drinking a bottle of wine. Great, that’s just f*****g peachy. A hand on my back nearly makes me jump out of my skin, but I force myself to stay calm as I clutch the gift tightly in my hand. The song from Frozen starts to play in my head. Don’t judge me, I am allowed to love Disney movies and who doesn’t like a sassy powerful female lead? One that for the first time in the history of Disney princess movies, doesn’t need a man to hold her hand to save her. I sing along to the lyrics of ‘Let it go” in my head and it helps calm down my racing heart as I take a step forward and lift my chin a bit as I paste a smile on my face. I walk right past Jaxon, not looking at him as I go to greet Clarisa, Archer’s mother and the coolest old lady I know, though I wouldn’t call her old out loud if I want to stay in her good graces. “Darling, you look absolutely terrible.” Clarisa says as she hugs me tightly. “And you smell like a wine cellar.” She says, pushing me away and scrounging up her nose. “Thanks’, now I feel so much better about myself.” I say in a sarcastic tone as I roll my eyes. “I am glad, Carter was able to get to you before you passed out.” She says with a laugh, and I shake my head at her. She is always busy trying to hook me up with one of her ‘boys’. She knows something happened between me and Jaxon, but the woman knows better than to mix into that bowl of worms and luckily started trying to hook me up with Carter. Lucky for me, Carter isn’t interested in me whatsoever and only seems to have eyes for Alison who works with the finances for Gwen. She is one hell of a sexy redhead with a rocking body so I really can’t blame him for not being able to keep his eyes off her and honestly, I don’t know if I would ever be able to handle that much of a man. Unfortunately for him, Alison has no interest in ever being with anyone long term or short term. I thought she might be a lesbian, even thought I might give it a shot and flirt with her a bit, you know, see if I can swing that way, but she told me straight away that she is only interested in men, but she just doesn’t have the time or the energy for one. Needless to say, I realized that I really love d**k and therein lies the problem. At least if I swing both ways, I would have more options. I greet everyone standing around, waiting for the news on the baby. I make a point of greeting everyone but Jaxon and I refuse to even look at him. I can see everyone looking between us, trying to see what will happen, but I don’t comment on it. I can feel his eyes on me, feel it burning a hole in my back, but I will not give in. I am a strong ass woman and if I can survive him walking out on me, I can survive his constant stares. I focus on keeping my body relaxed, singing song after song in my head, anything and everything to do with strong women or the power of women. From the song, ‘You don’t own me’ by Lesley Gore, to ‘This girl is on fire’ by Alicia Keys, plays through my head as we all stand there. Just as I get ready to start pacing the floor, the door to the delivery room opens and Archer steps out, a little bundle of blankets in his arms. None of us knew what the gender of the baby would be as Archer and Gwen refused to find out, wanting to keep it as a surprise and all of us had been waiting, not so patiently for the reveal and now here it is. “We have a little baby girl.” He says as his eyes shine with pride and unshed tears. He holds his girl close to his chest as the first tear slips and then he is full on crying as the biggest smile I have ever seen on a man stretches over his face. My arms ache with the need to reach out and take the baby from him, to cuddle her to my own chest and make silly baby noises at her. “How is baby momma doing?” I ask as I pat him on the back. “She did great. She is a f*****g super woman. Oh, s**t I should probably stop swearing.” He says as he finally looks up at me with red eyes. “You have time. Don’t be too hard on yourself.” I tell him before I step away from him and towards the room where my best friend is currently resting. “You gave f*****g life! And you did a good job at it. I feel like I should be handing you a medal or something.” I say as I make my way towards her. She is lying on the bed, still looking like a goddess even though she is covered in sweat. “I didn’t even hear you scream once, how is that possible? The women in the movies always make it look so damn painful to push out another living being.” I keep teasing. Gwen smiles at me and then she suddenly bursts out crying. What the hell did I just say? “I take it back, whatever I said to make the waterworks start, I take it back.” I say as I rush to her side, grabbing her hand and rubbing her hair back from her face. “No no no, I am just, holy s**t that hurts. I didn’t want Archer to know in how much pain I really was because he would freak out even more than he already was, but the movies aren’t kidding. Sure, I didn’t scream, but f**k, I wanted to. I am never ever doing that s**t again. It felt like a pineapple was being pulled out of my..” I hold up my hand for her to stop and she starts laughing before she groans in pain. “Alright queen, you have done your duty for mankind, but I can guarantee you that your man will want another and with how the two of you screw like bunnies, it is bound to happen that you end up knocked up with another.” I tell her, trying to keep my face straight, but her face goes white, and I start laughing. “That’s not very nice of you. I want to see you pushing out a body the size of a watermelon and then make jokes afterwards.” She says with a scowl, but I can see the amusement in her tired eyes. “Ah, but that won’t be happening to me. I am never getting married or sleeping with someone without that thing being wrapped up and then I will still make him pull out.” I say and my heart squeezes. Three months ago, I was dreaming about this. I wanted the big wedding and the two point five children. Three months ago, I thought I had found the man of my dreams, but that’s the thing I guess, dreams were meant for when you were asleep or lost in your own head. Not all of us can find a genie the way Gwen did. Not everyone get’s that happy true love ending. “You will find him, Carina. I know you wished that it was Jaxon, but he is messed up in the head with his own s**t and who knows, maybe he will get his s**t together, but if not him, it will be someone else.” She says and I force myself to smile even when all I want to do is cry. “You are one hell of a lucky bitch.” I tell her with a small laugh even though I know she is anything but lucky after everything she had to live through. Gwen looks over my shoulder and I turn to look with her, only to find Archer standing there, looking at her with such a deep love that my heart aches. Has anyone ever looked at me like that? Gwen stretches out her arms and I stand up to allow Archer space to hand over his daughter. I am about to walk out the room when I hear her say, “Yeah, I am a very lucky bitch.” She says and I look back at the happy family. God, I wish I had that. Just as I step out of the room, I bump into a hard chest, I look up slowly, nearly bending my head all the way up and I find a pair of beautiful soft green eyes that stole my breath and my heart right with it. I hate him, I f*****g hate him! I quickly push past him with my shoulder and make my way to where everyone else is getting ready to leave and give the couple their space. I pick up my handbag and leave the gift with the rest of them and then I start to walk away, holding onto my tears as my heart breaks all over again. Why the f**k do I let him get to me? “Carina, wait.” I hear him say behind me as I reach the stairs. “Carina, please.” He begs when I don’t stop walking. I spin on my heel and find him right behind me, his hand outstretched as if he was about to grab my arms to stop me. “Don’t you f*****g tell me to wait. I will never ever f*****g wait for you again. You have wasted enough of my time, and I refuse to waste another second of it on you. Now, I am going to turn around and get the f**k out of here and if you think for a second to follow me, you will end up with my fist in your throat and my knee kicking your balls so hard that the only way you will be able to scratch an itch is when you brush your f*****g teeth. Do you understand me?” I say, my heart beating fast as I look up at him. Before he can get past the shock of my words, I turn around and leave him standing there with his mouth hanging open. I don’t look behind him to see who heard what I said or to see their reactions. I need to get the hell out of here before I follow through on my threat. It is only when I step out of the hospital that I realize I didn’t come here in my own car, and I don’t have a phone to call an uber. Did I mention that I hate Jaxon Lopez? If I did, it is worth mentioning it again, and again.  
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